[Shipping]
Author: The Grey Potter
Description: Princess Celestia’s rule outlived her ability to care for it. She was frozen in place and endlessly repeating her duties and tasks for a world she no longer cared for nor actively participated in. But when she finds Twilight Sparkle, Celestia becomes aware of her life's struggles. And like it or not, these struggles have a time limit.Sunset Looms Part 1
Sunset Looms Part 2
Sunset Looms Part 3 (New!)
Sunset Looms Part 4 (New!)
Additional Tags: First Person Intropection, Tyrant Celestia, Twilestia, Mortality
82 comments:
Bookmarked to read.
ReplyDelete@RWC ^
ReplyDelete"Sunset" is becoming a trend, isn't it? :P
ReplyDeleteIf there is a god then I think you summed up how he/she might actually feel
ReplyDeleteAfter enough time watching everyone you've known Live and Die you just stop caring
Just finished the chapter. I will defiantly be keeping my eye on this story. Its hard to find such well thought out narratives.
ReplyDeleteI took a quick glance of it, to see what i'll be reading when I get back from my shenanigans tonight. So far it seems like it will be a good story. A story about an immortal Ruler that wishes to feel again, it might be cliche, but what I read the writing seems appropriate and it seems like it might turn out to be a good story
ReplyDeleteAnd now i feel forever sad for Celestia...again T.T
ReplyDeleteI have nothing better to do, so I guess I'll give it a read.
ReplyDelete@A Material Central I realized that there was another "sunset" titled story only after I had sent this in XD Ah well, tis life.
ReplyDeleteThis was a very nice break from all the other "tyrant Celestia" fics. It was also a very nice story in general. Will wait for further chapters to rate, but consider it a 4, close to 5 star for me.
ReplyDeleteUm, I posted a first here, now Its gone. It was a legit first.
ReplyDelete> Twilestia
ReplyDelete> Picture has Filly Twilight on Celestia's back.
I'm scared...
@Royal Guard Tictac
ReplyDeleteThis aspect struck a chord with me in a strange way.
This is actually how I'm beginning to feel about most fics.
I still like them but it's just so many variations on the same theme over and over that it's hard to feel like each story "matters" anymore.
I mean when there are 100 different good, evil and strange versions of each character you either need to pick one or let them all go.
Awesome. Very good story.
ReplyDeleteWhile the entire "Immortal bored with life" has been done to death, I liked this portrayal of Princess Celestia and een the pacing, while fast doesn't break flow.
So, I guess in this story there is no Luna/Nightmare Moon?. Huh
-Twilestia
ReplyDeleteoh god..
@Steve Jobs
ReplyDeleteStill rolling in your grave I see.
But yes. It's a worthwhile read.
Interesting. Good. Different. Will watch for more.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteCould do with some editing.
ReplyDeleteI am the slightest bit tired of "Tyrant Celestia" character reinterpretations that look at the show and deduce that she must be secretly completely different from the image of the benevolent ruler she projects. To me, it has never failed to feel forced.
Nevertheless, I did like the read. Slightly rambly, but I suppose it fits. I did find it strange that there was no mention of Luna - the one pony in Celestia's life whose sun never set. Is she intended to not be in the story at all, or are we going to get to that in chapter two?
I just realized Luna was mentioned, among the many beings that rival Celestia's lifespan who are imprisoned in some manner. It would make sense that she'd have put her out of her mind over the last thousand years.
ReplyDeleteThis is really quite good.
ReplyDeleteI'm liking this take, and I look forward to seeing where you take it. Celestia doing the research! Them Friendship reports are gonna be the salvation of Equestria I suspect.
ReplyDeleteAnd the Twilestia Renaissance continues! Huzzah!
ReplyDeleteNot sure why it's 4 thus far - this is an excellent interpretation of the character, and manages to pull off a tricky 1st person tone very well.
ReplyDeleteVoted 5 because it made me feel emotions.
Bookmarked. Twilight-Celestia shipping? Do want.
ReplyDeleteIt could use a little more editing, but otherwise this is actually a pretty good take. I'll be keeping an eye on this.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful piece and interpretation of Celestia. Reminds me of a poem by Gwendolyn Brooks . . .
ReplyDeleteI Think it must be lonely to be God.
Nobody loves a master. No. Despite
The bright hosannas, bright dear-Lords, and bright
Determined reverence of Sunday eyes.
Picture Jehovah striding through the hall
Of His importance, creatures running out
From servant-corners to acclaim, to shout
Appreciation of His merit’s glare.
But who walks with Him?––dares to take His arm,
To slap Him on the shoulder, tweak His ear,
Buy Him and Coca-Cola or a beer,
Pooh-pooh His politics, call Him a fool?
Perhaps––who knows––He tires of looking down.
Those eyes are never lifted. Never straight.
Perhaps sometimes He tires of being great
In solitude. Without a hand to hold.
As has been said already, this could use some editing. And maybe a break between paragraphs so it looks less like an imposing Wall o' Text.
ReplyDeleteI still loved it, though, and look forward to future chapters. I hope it's not just going to recap the events of the show with this perspective. It's tagged [Shipping] though, so I doubt it will be. Unless it is... then oh well. I'd still look forward to it, lol. This perspective is just so interesting.
I'm keeping my eye out for this one, as said above the wall of text is a little daunting, but a good read
ReplyDeleteInteresting first chapter,cant wait for more.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it will be a one sided "shipping" but i hope not, love the idea of Twilestia since its so painfully obvious that Twilight adores celestia almost fanatically.
A little tough to get through at the beginning, nothing a touch of editing and some word-tweaks can't solve.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure how Tyrant this Celestia really is. You carry the tired immortal presentation well, and I'm looking forward to seeing how the shipping angle will be taken. As Cedric said, I hope the story goes beyond merely recapping the show so far.
Can't wait for the next one!
This story makes ALOT of sense and fills in gaps which i never really got.
ReplyDeleteThis story describes very well how a 1000-years old inmortal ruler feel... But, apart from Twilight, she will have Luna, or not?
ReplyDeleteNot bad at all, though I worry the tone of this story will be difficult to maintain without breaking canon. Immortality is a very, very lofty subject to play this straight, especially in a shipping story.
ReplyDeleteInterested to see how things pan out, in any case.
I especially like how you handled Luna here, and how it affected Celestia. Looking forward to reading chapter three and seeing how Twilight's letters affect her problems. I'm kind of expecting her to be disappointed in the first letter not being a magic cure-all.
ReplyDeleteStill interesting. Still good. Still different. Still will watch for more.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very different and fascinating interpretation of Celestia. Looking forward to more!
ReplyDelete"The roof of this room had been intestinally removed, to allow access to the night sky"
ReplyDeletewow, that's... quite an interesting typo?
I think the author should have waited for the second chapter before submitting. I can see how the first, alone, would only get four stars, but with the addition of chapter two this is definitely 5-star material. Needs more kissy-face, though.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to start to tackle this soon.
ReplyDeleteOh author, Thank you for submitting to DOCS. I really am still having trouble getting over the annoyances of FIMFICTION and FANFICTION.
Thank you n.n
amazing read, I cannot wait for more.
ReplyDelete@rhiiazami
ReplyDeleteWow, crap, that is XD I wonder how that got past my editor.
Imma fix that.
An amazing story. The way you express Celestia's feelings it's fantastic! I can't wait for more. :D
ReplyDeletegreat work potter
ReplyDeleteI can't hit the 5 star button enough times.
ReplyDeleteAlso, is it over?
Parts 1-4 - incredible. This is a fresh take on Celestia, one I hadn't imagined possible. But here it is. You've captured something beautiful, Grey.
ReplyDeleteI found myself with hope in my heart. Love should be so fresh, always on the edge of loss, yet secure. (What do I know of romance? but this is beside the point.)
Oh wow, this is turning into a rather interesting interpretation of Celestia. o.o
ReplyDeleteThis is truly amazing. Please, continue soon.
ReplyDeleteIs it over? It feels like it...
ReplyDeletejust finished chapter 3 and I gotta say, why was I expecting the ending from this story http://www.fimfiction.net/story/3216/1/Army-of-the-sun/A-song-for-the-princess
ReplyDeleteto happen?
I read chapter 3 and I freaked out but someway I kept reading and ended chapter 4. It all went better than expected.
ReplyDeleteIs this over? Was that the last chapter? It's not labeled as complete, but the end of chapter four seemed very definitive. I hope that's not the end...
ReplyDeleteExcellent. I like this interpretation of the all-powerful Alicorn goddess. Any immortal being would succumb to this, and you do a good job portraying it.
ReplyDeleteI doubt this is over. I'm surprised (somewhat) that Luna didn't catch, if Celestia did indeed tell her everything in that break between CH3 and CH4, that Celestia's feelings towards Twilight seem more like a Mother / Daughter relationship, and thus it is fair for Tia to love Twi as if she was her mother..
ReplyDeleteCourse, that wouldn't work for shipping, but that was the distinct impression I got of Tia's feelings over the first two chapters.
and here come the tears
ReplyDeleteAnother update! Finally!
ReplyDelete@DarkRaven22 Honestly, the way that I see it was that the idea of love didnt occur to Celestia until Luna brought it up. So in the setup of the first two chapters, the interest was definitely platonic. Or... less, in some ways. Celestia is weird fun to write 8I
ReplyDeleteAnyway, this was supposed be listed as complete, but I think a mixup occurred. I sent an email about it, soooooo yeah =D
@The Grey Potter Hm.. it feels sorta like.. this chapter is complete, but the grand story is still ongoing. Like you could easily write another 4+ chapter story about what happens next. Dunno if you plan to do more or not with this version of the MLPverse. Will be interesting to find out.
ReplyDeleteAwwww so there is no 5th chapter? It's complete for reals? I suppose that works, though it feels like it could keep going.
ReplyDeleteWhat the hell is an "Intropection"?
ReplyDeleteNo 5th chapter.
ReplyDeleteTwi's final sunset comes before Celly is ready for it.
Well, that was just fucking beautiful.
ReplyDeleteBut jeez, I feel sorry for all of those poor fools who wish they could live forever. Immortality is a horrific curse.
Celestia and Twilight shipping.
ReplyDeleteWat. I'll have to read this later.
@DarkRaven22
ReplyDeleteRepost from my blog:
Honestly, several people (including some of my friends) say that this only sounds like a beginning, and there's way more to this. And there is. I still have ideas. But what I don't have right now is a story. I thought these four chapters could form a complete arc, a whole story, a good stopping place.
I might someday write a continuation of this, a sequel under a different title. But when I do that, the theme, the feel of the work would be a bit different, its own thing. A few more characters, a bit more rooted in actual events than an exploration of mindsets.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete@The Grey Potter
ReplyDeleteWhy you had to finish it like that? I mean, it's bucking awesome, but it's one of the saddest endings I've never read. Please, if that "someday" is within the next month, it would be nice. :(
No 5th chapter, and it is perfect this way, you sir know when to stop.
ReplyDeleteThis was the finest piece of narration I'd red in a while, you pretty much summed up what would an immortal ruler feel lile, think like.
I laughed at her awkwardness with TS, it was both cute and scary.
Anyway, excellent job, awesome story, all has been said.
No 5th chapter, and it is perfect this way, you sir know when to stop.
ReplyDeleteThis was the finest piece of narration I'd red in a while, you pretty much summed up what would an immortal ruler feel lile, think like.
I laughed at her awkwardness with TS, it was both cute and scary.
Anyway, excellent job, awesome story, all has been said.
AAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!! Twilight! Why you no love Celestia??
ReplyDeleteNo, Really I loved the end so beautifully soul crushing. But then again I love tragedy, and rusty razor-blade endings. It is a genre sadly lacking in most fics. There are several good grim and dark and war fics but so few that are true stories of mental and emotional suffering that makes tragedies like this one so very appealing.
On a side note, I'm so glad you're not one of those that automatically thinks that tragedy=death. No Celestia hanging herself or going on a killing spree. 9 5 stars from me.
@IbeforeEexceptafterC
ReplyDeletesorry just me again. Just wanted to say I don't know where the 9 came from. Meant to type 5 stars.
Cue Celestia pmv "I want to know what love is"
ReplyDeleteI was kind of reluctant at the beginning, but it turned out very well !
ReplyDeleteIt was a really nice portrait of Celestia. I'm a little sad that you made her "false" inside. I like to think she's really kind and caring, but that's not too important.
And it improves the way of how Twilight changes her, greatly. So that's nice. (Have you, by any chances, read the one shot Flow ? In a way, it's kind of similar to your story)
I especially love the dialogue between Celestia and Luna and Twilight Sparkle wallowing in whatever is that ponies wallow in; that was really funny !
Anyway, I wanted to thank you for your story. I did have a very nice moment reading it, thank you !
That was a beautifully written story...it was certainly a different take on Princess Celestia and how she viewed her relationship with Twilight.
ReplyDeleteI'm not the least bit surprised Twilight didn't return her feelings. That makes far more sense to me than any fic where Twilight does return such feelings.
On a side note, I noticed a turn of phrase in the last chapter, fall of my fetlock...do you mind if I use this phrase? It's such a perfect replacement for back of my hand that I can't help but want to use it myself.
You, sir, you have just made a perfect piece of a fanfic, it deserves all the 6 stars and more.
ReplyDeleteI loved Celestia's characterization and the way you kept Twilight in character with awkwardness and all. Even the narrative was brillant. This is the best fanfic under the Shipping label in all the archive no matter what they say. I would love to see more from you in the future.
An incredibly heartwarming story. Excelent. 4/5 stars,
ReplyDeletethis needs the sad tag *sniff* Q.Q
ReplyDeleteWow, out of the norm story, loved it, u should make a final chapter
ReplyDeletegreat story but it feels like maybe an epilog or something should be included
ReplyDeleteThat was a great story.
ReplyDeleteA romance with a realistic ending. Perfect fic.
ReplyDeleteVery enjoyable!
ReplyDeleteJust finished the last chapter, rated it a five after reading the second, and my rating still stands. Excellent story. The gaps in cannon are explained in a plausible way that fits cannon.
ReplyDeletethe first two chapters cover one event, in good detail to help us understand where the characters stand in relation to the story, to establish the setting, I was expecting a little more to be honest for the story part. It seamed a little rushed to shove everything down in two short chapters. Resolving the issues with Luna, herself, and finally with Twilight.
TL:DR the story was excellent as written and five stars from me ^^