• Story: Blueblood Returns (Update Story 3!)


    Author: Geldon
    Description: Despite her best efforts to the contrary, Prince Blueblood has returned for Rarity! It's up the other mane five and Spike to bring about a happy ending to this fairy tale. This fanfic endeavors to capture a fairly standard episodic feel to it.
    All Chapters + Story 3 After the break! 

    Google Documents
    Blueblood Returns

    Deviant Art
    Blueblood Returns Part 1
    Blueblood Returns Part 2

    Additional Tags: The mane six, Spike, Prince Blueblood, and a few surprises.


    Author: Geldon
    Description: At the end of the fanfic, Blueblood Returns, it seemed to be a happy ending. The villain's scheme was undermined, he was disgraced, and the heroes prevailed. However, from some readers, there was a cry for a sequel: where was the sympathy for Prince Blueblood? Where's his happy ending?

    Blueblood's Redemption is the result. As it deviates heavily from the happenings in Ponyville, it is somewhat less episodic-feeling, but there was still enough to say that it is slightly longer than the original story.

    It surprised even the writer by turning out to be a story that may make you laugh, cry, and everything in between. Oh, and it also includes a vital role for a certain mare magician!
    Google Documents
    Blueblood's Redemption

    Deviant Art
    Blueblood's Redemption Part 1
    Blueblood's Redemption Part 2
    Blueblood's Redemption Part 3

    Additional Tags: Prince Blueblood, The Great And Powerful Trixie, Princess Celestia, and two supporting OC: Blueblood's Guards (Hans and Fritz), Blueblood, Trixie, Celestia, Sequel, Epilogue

    Description: This stand-alone novel builds on the events in Blueblood Returns and Blueblood's Redemption. Twilight Sparkle and her friends are summoned to Castle Canterlot for an urgent mission involving Prince Blueblood and The Great And Powerful Trixie. There, they soon find themselves entangled in a maddening conspiracy.
    Google Documents
    The Blueblood Conspiracy

    Deviant Art
    The Blueblood Conspiracy Part 1
    The Blueblood Conspiracy Part 2
    The Blueblood Conspiracy Part 3
    The Blueblood Conspiracy Part 4
    The Blueblood Conspiracy Part 5

    Additional Tags: Prince Blueblood, The Great And Powerful Trixie, Twilight Sparkle, Spike, Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, OC Comedy, Drama, Friendship, Magic, Long


    1. Link leads to the Google Docs homepage. This has happened to me a couple times today with other fics, such as Tabluna Rasa.

    2. That was a wonderful story that really did read as a good, single episode. And the final few scenes were priceless.

      Excellent Work.

    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

    4. @Pen Stroke
      Thanks! I really hope everybody enjoys it.

    5. This was probably the best story I've ever read, if only because of the sudden twist towards the end (which I won't spoil for obvious reasons).

    6. This was really cute.
      And unlike some other fics involving cursing and references to sexuality (not that I mind those, because I don't) this one actually feels like it could be a real episode.

    7. I dunno why, but I felt like Luna should have been in there somewhere. It just would have fit.
      Still a great story. Really feels like an episode.
      But ouch, the iron cake platter?

    8. [Psychoshy]]WHY DOESN'T THIS STORY HAVE A SIX STAR RATING YET???[/Psychoshy]

    9. Yet again another great fic. :3

      And another reason among many to hate Blueblood.

    10. SPOILERS

      Loved when that little son of a bitch Blueblood got his cummupins from Celestia. I always wondered why she completely ignored his impudence at the gala, seeing as he's probably always like that. It's off to Krastos the Glue Maker with you, Blueblood!

    11. Ok, THAT was a really good read. I enjoyed it and loved the twist at the end. It is exactly why I kill off Blueblood in the fic I have stirring around in my head.

    12. Your fic is well written, has good pacing and very well working jokes. Clearly one of the better works featured on ED.


      I must confess though that I really REALLY hoped for a different twist at the end, but... Ah. That's life.

      We have numerous storied of Gilda's tragic past and inner turmoil, Trixie runs the full spectrum of Villain to lost little girl, and we have stories featuring a heroic Nightmare Moon. Nightmare Moon, of all ponies.

      So how come this guy can't catch a break? Whenever people write him into a story, it's either to make him suffer or to make him downright evil so he can suffer even more.
      I just don't get it...

    13. Just a random thought, but I don't think Applejack wheres a 10 gallon hat, but it's just a minor detail.

      So far it's been good, can't wait for the prince's plan to backfire!

    14. Prince Blueblood: The living embodiment of the phrase "bourgeois buttmunch."

    15. Absolutely beautiful! This has to be one of the best fan fiction stories so far. Highly recommended, it has the feel of a real episode of the show.

    16. @Anonymous

      All the other characters leave us wondering why they are like they are. They are fun to explore motives and backgrounds. Prince Royal Pain has nothing to make him interesting, he's like silver spoon and diamond tiara, just a spoiled brat born to privilege that has never known work or being useful.

    17. SPOILERS

      I didn't like the ending, it was really a confusing downer. The author built up all of Blueblood's chivalry and redemption in the eyes of Rarity...just to throw it all away just by randomly saying the prince was lying the entire time.

      As an earlier anon put it, "So how come this guy can't catch a break?" I mean, the end makes me feel like I wasted my time reading by expecting any reformations on Blueblood's part (which is what I expected, a redemption fic), and I've seen more reform for EVERY OTHER ANTAGONIST (that was a pony or griffon, anyway) in other fanfics.

      I just don't understand this. Even the description says, AND I QUOTE: "It's up the [other] mane five and Spike to bring about a happy ending to this fairy tale".

      Apparently the author's definition of 'happy' is an angry rejection, blaming others (how can we know Spike didn't put HIMSELF in the barrel to gain sympathy? and Rarity herself was the one who hit Spike with the cake, not Blueblood), and everything generally going back to Square 1.

    18. (Contains spoilers. Original writer, here.)

      Ah, poor Blueblood, I'd like to see him catch a break as well, but he wasn't so fortunate this time around.

      For what it's worth, he did everything in his power to be conniving snake worthy enough of his just desserts this time around.

      I do like to think that he may actually have a shot at turning over a new leaf after having a very stern conversation involving Princess Celestia and his mother (probably about getting his inheritance cut off).

      Apologies about the misleading, "happy ending to this fairy tale" description. It's a bit of a bonus joke: the implied meaning would be seeing a happy royal couple living happily ever after, but the actuality of it is that the happy ending is seeing the villain's plan fall to ruin.

    19. While it's plausible that Trixie could be redeemed (Gilda, I doubt), I don't see Prince Blueblood being like that, so I was okay with how this story came out, especially the ending (the image of Celestia dragging her nephew by the ears is very hilarious to me).

      And it's nice to see Spike being the clever one for once.

    20. You know, stories like this always make me sad.

      Oh it was an excellent story, don't get me wrong. Five stars. But what always makes me sad is how stories like this that are so great and would make such excellent episodes will never BE episodes and will likely never be animated in any way shape or form. :(

      But my personal unattainable wants aside, excellent job!! :D

    21. @Anonymous (2 above this post):

      Apparently Gilda (in some fanfics) had a bad childhood, leading to a Freudian excuse for her behavior. Also, in (our world's) mythology, in which gryphons were know to EAT horses (thus ponies too, assuming similar biologies). Apparently this means Gilda shows quite a bit of restraint (or Celestia is a tyrant who intimidates visiting gryphons). Combining these two (or with an author just liking her), there is potential for Gilda to be redeemed in fanfics.

      Or you could just see Gilda as being Dashie's possessive (lesbian) girlfriend instead of evil.

    22. @Geldon Yetichsky

      I find it ironic that you say you'd like to see Blueblood catch a break, and then in the next paragraph say he deserved it this time.

      I am not contesting his behavior in the episode, but your comment confused me.

      Since YOU'RE the author (if I did not misinterpret the first line of your comment), YOU have the all-mighty power of deciding his personality and intentions (since we know little from canon, and this is not a canon situation as of before season 2) 'this time around' (in this fanfic). Thus, YOU are the one deciding whether he is a 'conniving snake' or not.

      If you DID want Blueblood to catch a break, then why did you write him as not getting one and still being a jerk?

    23. Well, for what its worth, I saw the whole trick coming from the foreshadowing in the first couple paragraphs of the story. And really, this story was as much about Rarity taking Spike for granted as anything with Blueblood: Rarity learned her lesson, which I think was a pretty happy ending.

    24. @Anonymous
      (Contains spoilers, original author speaking.)

      It's because, even though I wanted to see Blueblood catch a break, I didn't feel I could reasonably do that until he learned his lesson.

      Oh my, did he ever get schooled this fanfic. However, in order for that to work, I had to decide on which side he fell: simply ignorant fop, or genuinely malignant jerk?

      Moreover, though, there was another villain of the story who received just desserts:

      Rarity herself.

      She learned firsthand that what she was doing to Spike was not all that different than what Blueblood was doing to her back at the gala, and felt terrible about it when she realized it. (The cake was the parallel there.) Enough so to drag her out of her boutique for a week to deal with soiled bandages in order to clear her consciousness.

    25. @Geldon Yetichsky
      I don't think I really established Rarity's moment of realization very much. Which is sort of embarrassing considering that was a large part of what I wanted to do from the start.

      I made a little fix after "the true gravity of Rarity's inadvertent crimes."

    26. Photo finish's accent came off reading as a mixture of french and scottish to me.

    27. @Geldon Yetichsky
      Good thing that you did that. When I first read your story, the part about Rarity recognising her behaviour went completely over my head (perhaps that happened with other readers as well).

    28. @Geldon Yetichsky"It's because, even though I wanted to see Blueblood catch a break, I didn't feel I could reasonably do that until he learned his lesson"

      Sooo... sequel? Pretty please?

    29. > Good thing that you did that. When I first read your story, the part about Rarity recognizing her behavior went completely over my head (perhaps that happened with other readers as well).

      Good! That was a point I really to make and before I made that change it was there but not underscored heavily enough for my liking.

      > Sooo... sequel? Pretty please?

      I'm definitely kicking around some ideas along those lines, but making it have as much punch as this story will take a bit of thought.

    30. @Anonymous

      "...we have stories featuring a heroic Nightmare Moon. Nightmare Moon, of all ponies."

      Seriously? When did that happen? I have to read those!

    31. I dare say Rarity leant a lesson the hard way. As for Prince Charmless (yes, that's a trope), I feel like he got off easy, at least as far as what we saw is concerned.

      Oh, and the guards' reaction to Fluttershy: priceless! It was by far the funniest thing I've read all month, and I can easily see it being used in an actual episode.

      Great work. Five stars.

    32. @AnonymousRead "The Stars Above Know". Mind you, that story has only begun...

    33. This comment has been removed by the author.

    34. I like the ending to Returns much more than Redemption itself, but eh; to each his own.

    35. Both stories had me reeling. Both flowed well, and both delivered competant, funny, and sometimes sad plots that had me enamored for a good hour and a half. 5/5 stars.

    36. Hey, Seth? It may be just me, but the first for Blueblood's Redemption(DeviantArt) leads to blogger.com.

    37. @Asgard314
      After all the effort, I'm glad to hear it. Thank you!

      Well spotted. I sent him an email about that first link getting dropped. Meanwhile, here it is:


    38. Trixie x Blueblood? It makes more sense than you'd think!

    39. Probably makes more sense then most pony shipping...

    40. one word ... EPIC .. i loved it :D... truly a masterpiece :D ...well done.

      i don't think i was ever proud to be a brony as i am now :))

    41. Wonder if the sequel fanfics will be called 'Blueblood Forever' followed by 'Blueblood & Robin'

    42. @Anonymous

      >Wonder if the sequel fanfics will be called 'Blueblood Forever' followed by 'Blueblood & Robin'

      ...which will be so terrible that then he'll have to reboot the franchise by writing the 'The Dark Prince' trilogy.

      Also, I enjoyed the second story a lot, as I mentioned over on ponychan. Thanks for continuing the story!

    43. I'm maybe 1/4 done with the second part, and it is even better than the first. Humanizing villains with plausible back story is always an entertaining read.

    44. Spoilers, kinda.

      Redemption started out really strong in the first two chapters. You got me laughing out loud several times. It seems to loose steam a little bit towards the end. Perhaps the love between Blueblood and Trixie, though it was rather obvious it was going to happen, still is a bit to quick and easy. However, there is over a week of time we don't see, so that has to be taken into account. And the mirror argument is very compelling indeed. Makes a lot of sense.

      All in all, this is heaps better then Blueblood's Return (which wasn't bad, but a not mind blowing either) and I did enjoy reading it.

      But those poor guards :P

    45. "It seems that I have even outsmarted myself"
      And then Trollestia trolled herself.

      Part 2 was even better than the first story, I think. Redemption-through-backstory fics are obviously nothing new, but this is one of the very rare ones I've seen that manages to pull off a plausible explanation for their personalities (for two characters, even, though I don't really agree with that interpretation of Trixie I feel must be said) without using the explanations as excuses for or reasons to justify their behavior.

    46. Blueblood's Redemption was really great. Going to far as to make Blueblood appear sympathetic and replace Twilight as the pony I'd most like to see hook up with Trixie is a pretty impressive feat.

      Attributing all of his bad behavior to one of Celestia's schemes is going a bit far in terms of trying to redeem his character, imo. Though, I suppose with all the crying coming from this very comment section you probably felt pressured to do so. It doesn't exactly paint Celestia in a good light. Particularly the part where she shames him in front of the entire nation when he was only doing what she programmed him to do.

      I don't really see what everyone likes about Hans and Fritz either. They just seem like faceless pawns with no personalities of their own. I do like that they seem to symbolize the feeling of domination that lingers with Blueblood even after he leaves Canterlot. When they disappear it's like he's finally free to be his own self.

      Blueblood Returns is episode material, plain and simple. I don't see why nobody seems to agree that he most definitely got what he deserved. Perhaps if the Spike abuse had been more descriptive...

    47. @Stephen Cawking
      Good observations all. I knew that when I wrote this that there would be some room for interpretation because of the depth of what I was going for, and I decided that rather than let that bother me I was going to say that having different interpretations of it is a good thing.

      Those particular things did hit me while I was writing it. You might be interested in knowing why I went in this direction anyway:

      In the case of Celestia making Blueblood what he was, the idea I had there was that there would need to be a good reason this immortal who is so good at guiding her ponies would allow Blueblood to turn into this villain. It hit me that being a figurehead would be good use for such a character, and the potential harm of Nightmare Moon's return would provide adequate motivation to even turn on her own kin to do it (putting the needs of the many ahead of the few and such).

      Hans and Fritz I underplayed deliberately because I respect that a lot of fanfic readers like to have little to no OC influence, as OC deviate from the show they know and love. What they ultimately were was standard Equestrian Guardsmen who we've already seen, but with the comedic misfortune to be assigned to be Blueblood's personal guard. I gave them names and a slight appearance difference because I knew their increased role in this story would require they do a little more than just tag along.

      I had decided that Blueblood Returns was going to be a lot more "episodic feeling," I even mentioned that right up there in the description of both stories. I decided that I had to write Blueblood's Redemption somewhat differently because the subject of a villains motives and redemption would have to go a bit deeper than the fun surface impression that episodes are written to project. The cartoons are primarily a visual medium. I did, however, focus heavily on implementing humor and characterization because, in my interpretation/opinion, these are the two greatest appeals of MLP:FIM.

      Indeed, I also felt that loss of steam towards the end, but I had a reason: I was trying to communicate this message of how Blueblood's insufferable attitude made sense, and why Trixie turned out to be the perfect ship to pull him out of it, so I had to underscore it pretty heavily. Earlier drafts didn't have as much heavy exposition, but the proofreaders missed why Trixie was there and why Celestia was involved.

    48. One more thing to mention. What I could have done is where you start a second story with the idea of redemption and suddenly the villain isn't villainous at all, just misunderstood. I'm sure we've seen more than a few "redemption" fanfics like that.

      I didn't want to do that, because I wanted to establish that Blueblood was indeed nothing less than a villain. Throughout the story he's still inclined to behave as one. What we learn by the end is that his tragic life is what made him one.

      But I didn't want to stop there, I wanted to see our villain be reformed enough that he can get a happy ending. By the end of the story he gets a glimpse of the light at the end of the tunnel, and Celestia explains how she intends to rescue him from being the villain. (Not to mention how she - and anyone else who was looking out for the good of Equestria - was responsible for putting them there in the first place.) Also, you know, getting the love of a beautiful significant other is a bit of happy ending in and of itself.

    49. OMFG... Please write a funfic about Blueblood and Trixie's foals!

      For once we have a non-lesbian ship, I want to see this through.

    50. If I did continue this story, I think it might be fun to start with Blueblood and Trixie raising havoc inside of Castle Canterlot and see where it goes from there. There'd also be the potential to pull back in the mane 6 and Spike and see their take on Trixie x Blueblood.

    51. Very good way not compromise BB's personality. I can't believe this is the first Trixie/BB, it works so well

    52. I... I absofricken' love Redemption.

      I'm the Anon above (5, If I count correctly) who decried Bluebloods' usual role as handy boogypony, by the way. And I have to say, you managed a truly impressive feat: Make both Trixie and Blueblood into a character that can be related to, without absolving them from their responsibility for their actions. They're both still egotistic jerks, but they have the chance to get beyond that; As the title suggests, redemption.

      I can also see Celestia acting like she did. After all, her response to her top students (legitimate!) concerns about the return of an ancient eldritch evil was, to put it bluntly, 'get a life'; She's clearly used to shaking others form their confort zones. Not to mention, he had it coming. Boy did he have it coming.

      Lastly, as surprising as it may be, this is actually the second story I've read that proposed this pairing, although in the other one it was more of a looming threat XD.
      Clearly, this ship appears to be working for some. Myself included: These two deserve each other. Either to heal each other... or drive each other crazy. (as Sartre wrote: Hell is other people)

      PS: Now I'm curious what the Ponyvillians might think of this pair. The best revenge is a life well-lived, eh?

    53. If you do write another story, then I demand it be called 'Blueblood Forever'

      the batman reference is too good to be allowed to go to waste

    54. @Stephen Cawking
      That Batman reference was great, and took me completely by surprise. The actual link I had there was "re-turns" versus "re-demption."

      If I were to call the next one Blueblood Forever, would I call the one after that Blueblood Forever After?

      Hah, four potential titles in and I've yet to come up with good enough idea to be the core revelation of the third story.

    55. I feel like I shouldn't pity Blueblood, but this story makes it impossible not to.

    56. You've got a great mastery of the episodic style (the continued repetition of the final line as the first line of the following scene was great), and this story made me laugh quite a few times. The writing needs some tightening -- I saw at least one typo, but moreso the lack of starting capitals in dialogue -- and I was particularly thrown by the continued unnecessary descriptions of the mane cast. We know who they are and what they look like, you don't have to tell us! I did feel like my enjoyment of the story outweighed the structural issues, at least.

      So there's a sequel, eh? I'll need to read that at some point.

    57. @Present Perfect

      I should probably go back and fix that story's quotations. Though I've a pretty good grip on grammar, one rule that escaped my notice was the idea that you need to capitalize the first letter of dialogue in quotations (unless it is a continuation of dialogue from earlier in that sentence). An editor pointed it out to me in Blueblood's Redemption and I learned my lesson.

      As for why I took the time to describe the characters, it was a combination of wanting people not familiar with the show to have some understanding of what the characters look like and those who were familiar with the show getting a little fan buzz out of recognizing their favorite characters before they were confirmed.

    58. Very impressive work. I confess I'm avoiding the second story because i dislike sad, but i'd love to read more funfics if yer writing them. this was a true gem.

    59. @The Ferret
      Funny enough, for a writer who can pull off sad by many reader's opinions, I'm not wild about applying sad to pony. I like these characters, I hate to see them meet a bad end! So whenever I write that, you can be sure it's going to be less grimdark and more grimlight.

    60. Just for the sake of getting people to read the undeniably satisfying (people will be calling it that, eventually) sequel, I'd like to point out that the [Sad] elements pales in comparison to the other categories.

      Take it from somepony who's read it firsthand: it won't disappoint.

    61. Just for the sake of getting people to read the undeniably satisfying (people will be calling it that, eventually) sequel, I'd like to point out that the [Sad] elements pales in comparison to the other categories.

      Take it from somepony who's read it firsthand: it won't disappoint.

    62. Well, this second story has changed my opinion of Blueblood. After the first one, I didn't think the author had been hard enough on him. After reading the second one, I still think he's a jerk (as is Trixie), but at least he's now an interesting jerk, and I hope the author has plans to continue this timeline.

    63. All I get for "The Blueblood Conspiracy" is an "Internal Server Error" message. How about putting it up on GoogleDocs?

    64. This comment has been removed by the author.

    65. As always it was an enjoyable read from an author who dares to think differently when it comes to a near universally despised character.

    66. Best ending.

      I particularly like how you reminded everyone of how they overlooked Rarity's selfish GOLD DIGGING and focused on Blueblood's lack of social graces.

      The former is a far worse character flaw than the latter.

    67. Well. That was much better redemption than any Gilda or Trixie fanfic I've seen before, congratulations for completely saving the character for me. Now we only need somebody to fix DIAMOND TIARA!

    68. Wow. You just made one of the most pompous pricks in fiction a genuinely interesting character with actual depth. I applaud you, good sir/madam (damn Internet).

    69. XD Read the first story... The best line (so far) HAS to be Photo Finish! XD

      XD No, one takes it back. That one scene is the best. You know the one... Though Spike's parting comment is good as well!

    70. Just finished Story #3. ...Wow. I never thought I'd ever say this, but way to go, Blueblood.

    71. O.O

      HOW?! The GREAT and POWERFUL Trevor tips his hat to you, author... It took a lot of thought to be able to figure out how to make even somepony like Blueblood likable like that... That was INDEED a redemption story, almost as good as Past Sins! One will now rush onto the third story! The G&P Trevor gives the second story 7/5 stars!

    72. I can't hear "yellow demon of the gala" without thinking of Mega Man.

    73. Still disappointed that there are only 75(76 now.) comments here.

      Hope people aren't avoiding this because of their unnecessary Blueblood hate.

    74. BB Returns: This is a bit scrappily-written, but humorous enough. Rating: Owl's Well That Ends Well

      BB Redemption: Significantly improved. Blueblood's past is well-written and sympathetic, yet changes none of his arrogance. It got even better towards the end; Princess Celestia was Magnificent. Rating: The Cutie Mark Chronicles

      The Blueblood Conspiracy: The very first fic I've read that felt completely in tune with the setting and characters. You understand the setting perfectly and you've got the sense to let it stand & not overwhelm it with what you wanted to see. On to the story!
      It is completely logical that it opens with a massive fight. It is right and proper that it be a proper Appleloosa-style slapstick war. :-D
      Spike getting some story love was a welcome break. Too many focus on the 'baby' part of 'baby dragon'.
      I've seen CMFIS before, but this was fucking hilarious (Faust would totally have done something like that) and deserves to be an episode. Rating: The Best Night Ever

    75. Someone needs to get to making teh fan art!

    76. Thanks very much for the comments so far. I'm trying to dissuade my normally verbose tendencies so as to not appear overwhelming and daunt any of the excellent feedback I'm getting here.

      In general, sounds like it's been well received! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

      Looks like practice is making perfect. :) Funny story about Blueblood Returns, when I created it for some reason another story I wrote, "The Centerpeice Of My Collection" fell through the cracks. I interpreted it as meaning that the bronies just didn't want anything so heavy! So I throttled that original story down to resemble a basic episode as much as possible. Suddenly, TCoMC got a lot of notice and I realized I can go ahead and add a bit more depth to it. So that explains why it went the way it did.

      It's true the series has not picked up a whole lot of notice, but I think that's because in general a lot of bronies are quite happy to let Blueblood remain the arrogant comic foil. That's fine, but it was good to be able to provide the flip side of that too.

      I would not turn down some cool fan art. :) I could totally imagine a Past Sins-esque montage of the happenings in The Blueblood Conspiracy. But I don't think that just fell in Penstroke's lap, he put some real work to having that done.

    77. Was mostly trying to get any talented fan to realize they could make fan art of this.

    78. @Corkscrew
      Sounds good to me. :) I know I would be flattered.

    79. *Eyetwitches* Firefox made one lose one's VERY long comment, and one can't even remember half of what one said at the beginning. One would just like to say that halfway through, you typed Appleback instead of buck, and hands instead of hooves for when she's about to break in. (Thank God for Ctrl+f! 8D

      Overall, another 6/5 star rating from the GREAT and POWERFUL Trevor! (Though you did SUCH an amazing job, I shall allow you the HONOR of calling me Magical Trevor.)

      (And just because One knows that ONE has these weird little dreams about unpublishable OCs, had you ever thought of what their filly or colt would look like, what their name is/was, ect? Just curious! :3 )

    80. Wow. Just...epic. That third story is quite possibly one of the greatest fics I have read. My favorite part was how you were able to tie CMFIS (cutie mark failure insanity syndrome, for those ill-informed bronies) with the respective elements of their bearers. Most excellent!

      I commend you for your work, Mr./Mrs. Geldon!

    81. I feel ambivalent about this Celestia.
      I can't fault her plan, but I feel like she gets off too easy for it if she really is sorry.
      "I helped him fall in love."
      Oh well, that excuses and erases years of brainwashing and emotional mismanagement.
      Oh wait, no it doesn't.

      If she was truly, truly sorry, she would TELL him.
      Honestly, she should have just set aside some time so she could explain to him what she told Hans and Fritz.
      Helping him fall in love may ease some of what was done to him, but it is in no way a substitute for an honest apology.

      But that's really my only beef with the story. Besides that it's pretty darn good.

    82. Oh, I almost forgot: Celestia not telling Twilight Sparkle that her life depends on remaining friends with five specific ponies.
      Maybe Celestia is afraid if she tells Twilight then somehow that will mess with the friendship chemistry.
      Still, it's probably kind of important that Twilight know. Because apparently, every time they have issues, Twilight's gonna start fainting and possibly even die if they're contentious enough.

    83. Another excellent story. Your concept of how the EoH can leave their bearers susceptible to madness does indeed seem to match what we see in the show. Trixie and Blueblood are both maddeningly arrogant yet (somewhat) relatable. All in all, well done.

      The one thing that's bugging me (and did to a lesser degree in Bluebood's Redemption) is Celestia. Maybe it's the libertarian in me speaking (no, not the Ron Paul-esque libertarian, the theological libertarian), but I find the fact that nopony ever calls her out on her manipulations unsatisfying. It seems like all involved, from Applejack (who's the element of HONESTY, for chrissake) to Blueblood (who, despite what he gained in terms of personal and romantic growth, has still indisputably been through hell and back because of Celestia's manipulations) are willing to sigh and agree that the ends justify the means. Maybe they do, or at least maybe they're supposed to--I personally might not think so, but I also think it's pretty shallow for a reader to get annoyed that a story doesn't reflect their own moral compass perfectly--yet it seems like Celestia is never really forced to defend her actions. Yes, she EXPLAINS elements of what she's doing to Spike and AJ in a few places, after being called out by them, but both seem willing to accept the wisdom/necessity of her decisions. I just feel like many ponies, not least several of the major players in this story, would not be so quick to accept the princess's explanations.

      I would hasten to add that while this issue may have bothered me, it did not significantly detract from my enjoyment of the story. I don't know if you intend to follow Blueblood any further, but if you do I'll be looking forward to reading about it.

    84. The Princess Celestia thing is a good point, and the truth of the matter is, I did that deliberately. She's not 100% benevolent in one key way (and that ties into how it's wrong to be an unabashed Machiavellian):

      She's an immortal who has built an unwavering belief over the centuries that mortals are flighty creatures who can't handle the whole truth to her grand plans. Not right away, maybe even never. She misleads them because she cares, "For their own good," but what she's doing is not morally excusable on some levels.

      Spike had to call her out and force her to disclose what she did, because if he was thrown in the dungeon or otherwise predisposed, his friends would know something was up. Even then, she only cracked because she figured (rightly) that dragons have a genetic inclination to hold on to great secrets and he was in an ideal position to do something about it.

      She can't let the Mane Cast members know what she did to them because she figures she would lose their trust - and she'd probably be right! Once she lost their trust, she's lost control of the Elements of Harmony, who are probably the most powerful force of magic in Equestria.

      Nor did she tell them what the Elements of Harmony would do them because there was too much at stake. She feels bad about it, I'm sure, but she's probably done a lot of things over the century she's felt bad about.

      That said, should I go back and include that in the story? I'm inclined to believe that would be a bad idea. There's a few good reasons for that. One of them being that what Celestia does is a mystery that only she knows. Another is because I think that including that information would have given the reader too much to be concerned about at once. It really would have dragged down the story.

      But, thank you for making me think about this, because it definitely seems like something that should be expressed. It seems there's more to be said about this Blueblood story! I also have another big reveal that I'm considering.

    85. @Geldon Yetichsky
      Dude, this was a seriously good fic. All three really. In order, I rate them as follows. 5/5 for Blueblood returns, simply because it was funny, clever, and the bit with spike and rarity was cute and was pretty deep. Loved it.

      The sequel was pretty damn good too! However, 4/5, since regardless of your very impressive talent to flesh out the nature of emotion and the personalities of your characters and present them (your take on blueblood and why he was a arrogant gasbag was insightful: poor guy was groomed to be a jerk his whole life!) and his finding trixie was a nice touch, and I loved when he sacrificed himself for her with the cockatrice, that being the first time he ever felt noble.
      However, I felt like for all the progress he seemed to make, he didn't change that much. His whole running away from home bit, wanting freedom from the prison of royalty, I loved the idea! I thought, "wow, no he goes around with trixie and reforms himself! maybe he'll confront the mane 6 even, fix everything too!", but then it kinda abruptly ended with him returning to the castle, trixie in tow. Conspiracy gets a 3/5 though. I was kinda put off by the craziness of the mane 6. not that your idea about them going against their elements wasn't creative, it just seemed superfluous, since I was really expecting this to be the fic that saw blueblood and trixie truly reformed and them and the mane 6 to work out their little issues. Kinda took a odd turn, wasn't too my taste, still excellently written, but hey, its all IMHO.

      whatever, I hope this all too long review I'm giving shows how much I enjoyed your writing, despite my critiques. Anyway, there are really only 3 things I had issue with beyond those above in your fics that I thought would be a nice touch, for something like an epilogue if you cared to give one (which I would LOVE to read) and cared too listen to my suggestions. 1st, I really wanted to see Blueblood talk things out with Hans and Fritz, since their relationship could have done with some reconciling. woulda been nice to see them work it out, blueblood acknowledging he was a prick basically, apologizing or something, and Hans and Fritz responding however. Also, would have loved to see Blueblood and Rarity actually meet and talk out how they were both in the wrong. would have been nice. the zaniness of the throne room seen was cool and did basically that, but still, wasn't as personal i guess? finally, trixie didn't get any redemption time or time to call out the mane 6 (again, both the mane 6 and trixie were in the wrong over the whole Boast busters debacle).

      anyway, I'm done. (I wonder if he'll bother to read this...) also, I'm pretty sure yours is my personal favorite interpretation of Celestia and Luna. Excellant. I love the Machiavellian nature to them, and in general, it felt as close to show accurate as they could get (I hope... luna in less than a week!) keep writing. great stuff. (whew!)

    86. I'm losing my grip on curbing my verbosity. :P
      Thanks for the great feedback!

      I did hear from quite a few people that "Blueblood's still a jerk" at the end of Blueblood's Redemption. The thing is, I didn't want him to turn good overnight, I wanted it to take some time. A lot of redemption fics are built around the idea that "they were good all along, they just needed a chance to get out from under whatever's holding them back." I'm not assuming that here: Blueblood's a jerk! So recovery is going to take a bit longer.

      I agree that I had way too much fun with the Mane Six's big descent into madness (it's there in the writer's notes). It's a little too sharp. But I decided to look the other way for that very reason: it's fun to watch them go crazy. In the end, I hoped the journey would be worth going that way. He's still not completely redeemed completely in The Blueblood Conspiracy, but now he at least would seem to have half a clue that he had been on the wrong path.

      I could do a lot more with Hans, Fritz, Primrose, and Zinnia, but I'm a little afraid to do that because a lot of people like to keep their OC involvement to a minimum. So I've somewhat regulated them to a support role. They're definitely there, and sometimes their participation is needed, but I'm careful to avoid making them teh focus of the story.

    87. I really, really didn't like the third story; so I'll try (and most likely fail) to make this succinct so there is less to be torn apart over because it looks like I'm standing alone on this.

      I've already said that I don't like the way Trixie was written in the previous story, so I won't go any further with that. But Celestia, almost immediately after the story started, outright pissed me off.

      Several characters over the course of the story outright state that she's basically being a manipulative bitch, Applejack especially. They express outright worry about whether or not Celestia truly should be putting her hand in everything the way that she is, Applejack especially. Even Twilight starts having major doubts about Celestia's ability to control things as well as she things she can.

      And as the story went on she does nothing to assuage that image, in fact implying the opposite: That she knew about their concerns but simply didn't care to calm them. And things eventually do spiral far out of Celestia's control, exactly as Applejack was so worried that they would. But then the story ends like it never happened and no one is the worse for wear. Applejack was completely correct from the start and expressed legitimate personal concern about what would happen to her and her friends, to the extent that she had basically a complete nervous breakdown about it before she had even done anything; but Celestia gets off without even being chewed out for basically causing exactly what Applejack was so worried about.

      I'm not going to lie: I almost stopped reading several times over how she was portrayed, and only continued the story because I figured that, since everyone was learning something about themselves, the payoff for her would be similarly refreshing. Nope. Right up to the end she's pulling Blueblood and Trixie's strings and even the Mane Six are ultimately in on the act, like it was no big thing. This was particularly heinous when she practically gave Spike the definition of CMFIS, and then purposely sent the Mane Six to do tasks that would end up triggering it anyways; meaning she knew full well what could happen but didn't even care.

      Maybe I'm just missing something, but the above weighed on my mind far too much to gleam any enjoyment from the story. Sorry.

      I will say that I did enjoy Blueblood calling Rarity out, for as little as that may be worth coming from me.

    88. @TenchiFreak5
      You do have a good point, and some of the earlier posts brought this up as well: Princess Celestia is let off the hook way too easily.

      Part of the reason why is because she's the beloved ruler of their nation and essentially has their subjects wrapped around her little hoof from centuries of this kind of subtle manipulation.

      However, the more I hear about it, the more I can't help but think Princess Celestia should get some major comeuppance...

    89. @Geldon Yetichsky

      >I can't help but think Princess Celestia should get some major comeuppance...

      PLEASE yes. For me, that would go a long way toward addressing my major issue with this story. Heck, even if she doesn't get some sort of poetic justice served up to her, just having the characters around her to show some sort of reaction to her constant manipulations (anger, disgust, and a crushing sense of betrayal all come to mind--at least, that's how I'd feel, put in Blueblood's/the mane 6's places) would be nice.

      Anyway, maybe something to think about for a 4th story.

    90. I enjoyed the first two fics, though the romance was rushed in the second one, but Celestia ruined the third one for me, especially since there wasn't actually that much focus on Blueblood in the third one. I can't believe Pinkie Pie asked Blueblood to thank Celestia. Yes, auntie, thank you for manipulating my entire life. I spent countless nights crying myself to sleep over the years for the sake of your unnecessary, idiotic plan B that never would have worked anyway and I have no friends, but it's alright since you hooked me up with Trixie. Canon Celestia was a bit manipulative, but her manipulations were nowhere near this hurtful and she did it to protect Equestria, never for something as frivolous as meddling in others' romantic lives.