• Story: Mines of Dragon Mountain (Update Complete!)

    [Crossover] More Doctor Whooves!

    Author: Hephestus
    Description: After being dropped off by The Doctor Twilight and her fellow TARDIS travelers are made an offer they can't refuse by rich and powerful CEO Zeitgeist Stardust. With benefits for everypony they set off for Dragon Mountain Resort for a weekend of rest and relaxation. But all is not well in Dragon Valley, as Zeitgeist's mines are rumored to be plagued with disasters and mysterious deaths. Talk of strange noises at night and rumors of sightings of strange creatures circulates the resort. As always The Doctor appears in the thick of things and before long he and his pony companions find themselves in a race against time, with not only the lives of tens of thousands hanging in the balance, but the future of Equestria as well!
    Mines of Dragon Mountain Chapter 1
    Mines of Dragon Mountain Chapter 2
    Mines of Dragon Mountain Chapter 3
    Mines of Dragon Mountain Chapter 4
    Mines of Dragon Mountain Chapter 5
    Mines of Dragon Mountain Chapter 6
    Mines of Dragon Mountain Chapter 7
    Mines of Dragon Mountain Epilogue (New!) 

    Mines of Dragon Mountain Complete! (New!) 

    Additional Tags: Doctor Whoof!

    127 comments:

    1. oh my goodness yaaaaay~
      I am so glad you are doing another one, I know you said you were but I wasn't sure, this is the best and you are my favorite Doctor Who/Pony writer!

      ReplyDelete
    2. also I'm sure your last story qualifies for 6 stars by now, how many 5 stars does it need again?

      ReplyDelete
    3. Hephestus doing another Dr.Whoof fanfiction at last?

      This day is perfect.

      ReplyDelete
    4. What's this '6-star' thing I keep hearing about?
      Anyway, expect a change in title cards for both this and Time Lords and Terror at some point in the near future

      ReplyDelete
    5. oh it's a tag change for only the coolest of stories, once it gets so many good votes it gets categorized as such
      I think it's like 60?
      I don't know

      ReplyDelete
    6. by the way you should ask to get your last story your author tag on it
      http://www.equestriadaily.com/2011/03/story-timelords-and-terror.html

      ReplyDelete
    7. @BB
      Really? Awesome! I'm flattered! Well, I'll be sure to try my best to earn such a score!

      ReplyDelete
    8. @BB

      It's 50 votes with a 4.9 average or higher.

      Which Timelords and Terror has, so yeah, it should be a six star story now.

      ReplyDelete
    9. >50 votes

      haha awesome
      get on Seth's ass about that Hephestus!
      your last story has a straight 5.0

      ReplyDelete
    10. Instantly added to my "To read" list upon seeing the author.

      ReplyDelete
    11. Holy Jesus Christ monkey balls its the sequel. I'm going to read the crap out of this.

      ReplyDelete
    12. You ACTUALLY made that sequel? I thought you just put that in for fun. This is going to be good.

      ReplyDelete
    13. @Hephestus

      Hephestus, I'm so happy to see this story up. Timelords and Terror was the first FiM fic I read, and to this date it's still in my holy trinity of FiM Fanfiction awesomeness, right up there with Fallout: Equestria and Better Living Through Science and Ponies.

      I'm really looking forward to this story, and I admit it'll be interesting to see if the gang will have to face some of the chaos of this trip before the Doctor shows up.

      ReplyDelete
    14. haha Hephestus you do not disappoint
      that was spectacular

      god-berry~
      can't wait for the rest

      ReplyDelete
    15. Correct Doctor Who pacing and nearly perfect characterisation. I don't think that Rarity would say "Hey Doctor", but I'm nit picking. Great work.

      ReplyDelete
    16. Wow! There's already a TVTropes page for this one! It's a little bear, but hey it's only the first chapter out

      ReplyDelete
    17. @Anonymous
      Whoops! Link didn't take! O well, here's the adress!

      http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Fanfic/MinesOfDragonMountain

      ReplyDelete
    18. Hephestus failing to disappoint.

      Like Timelords and Terror, this story shines in the characterizations. Not just in their personalities and thought processes either but you managed to perfectly adapt them to the mindset of Doctor companions (Once you're in the Tardis, life is never the same). Especially digging The Doctor himself, being in a new universe means he's a little less all knowing.

      Extra kudos to expanding the workings of Equestria beyond Ponyville. I'm starting to get a bit of an "Oddworld" kind of vibe from it.

      Timelords and Terror was one of only 5 Fanfictions I have ever archived in my life. It would appear I'll be making room for a number 6 in the near future.

      ReplyDelete
    19. Genius, my brony, genius.

      One of the best works of crossover I have read. Magnificent both in plot, in characterization and in humor/horror.

      I hope you update pronto,

      Have a nice day.

      ReplyDelete
    20. I just wanted to say I love the way the relationship between Rainbow Dash and the Doctor is turning out.
      She really isn't the type of person, er, pony that would would normally impress him, is she?

      I'm actually feeling her frustration and hoping she gets a chance to prove herself to him soon. That right there, that's good writing.

      ReplyDelete
    21. @Treble
      Don't worry, she will. But not in the way she thinks she will ;)

      Sorry for the late update guys, it's just that summer suddenly happened after a *lot* of rain and I just had to go camping. The need to camp was so strong it was nearly involuntary! But it's good to be back and writing again!

      ReplyDelete
    22. Oh *crap*.

      I know Tirac.

      No good will come of this.

      ReplyDelete
    23. @HephestusAh, now that is cryptic. Love it.

      ReplyDelete
    24. Part 1 was brilliant, I'm very excited to read Part 2 *yawn* right after I get some sleep...

      ReplyDelete
    25. This is INCREDIBLE! This is better written than the official Doctor Who novels, the author has done research into what he's writing about (at least with the airships, because I'm like Apple Bloom there), AND THERES PONIES!

      ReplyDelete
    26. Scootaloo looked back and forth between them. “It was the green mushrooms right? I’ve always wanted to try those!”

      *snarf*

      ReplyDelete
    27. >the centauri republic
      >my face when
      >the doctor accidentally setting up a centauri invasion of equestria

      If Luna starts asking everybody "What do you want?" I'm not sure what I'll do.

      Also in before the lawyer pony turns out to have been on loan from a certain blond-maned stallion with an hourglass cutie mark.

      ReplyDelete
    28. >The Doctor smiled broadly. “Ponies…you have it so easy! No fuss, no muss, just one day ‘boom’ and you have a little tattoo on your arse telling you what you like. Built to be happy, you lot! Brilliant design by the way, all I got is a boring old hourglass!”

      HAHAHAHAHA

      ReplyDelete
    29. Babylon 5 references yesssssssss

      ReplyDelete
    30. I am kinda new here, how long does it usually take Hephaestus to update?

      Not saying he should rush or anything...

      Just wondering.

      ReplyDelete
    31. @Anonymous
      Sorry it's taking so long everyone! I've got a summer course that will be eating up my time and concentration for the next week. But don't worry, chapter 3 will be out by wednesday-ish. I hope you'll find it worth the wait!

      ReplyDelete
    32. Hmmmm.. B5 + Doctor Who + ponies = AWESOME!!!!!

      Is it just me or are the Grendal Ponyvers versions of the Silurians?

      ReplyDelete
    33. Even more Bowie references! Nice.

      Things are really starting to heat up now. What to do until the next chapter? Maybe it's time to reread everything.

      The first meeting of Ziggy and The Doctor was great, by the way. I've never though I'd find a conversation about office decor so compelling.

      ReplyDelete
    34. I caught the Eau de Méchant loup...

      Or, as we say in English... Water of the Bad Wolf...

      ...Oh my >:) I like where this is going...

      ReplyDelete
    35. I really like how you're reintroducing some of the G1 villains, and Ziggy especially is a much better character than I thought he would be. My favorite bit is that it seems like so far he's taking the threat of Tirac entirely seriously, with what little slivers of information he's been given.

      Wouldn't that be a bite if all the Thinkers had to do was tell the Duke what he was doing.

      ReplyDelete
    36. This may be out of place, but as an aspiring writer, I have to ask: where does one go to Do the Research? Specifically, what resources did you use to make all that firework "geekspeak"? Wikipedia? Lots of Google? A friend who happens to be a professional pyrotechnician? Was any of it pure conjecture/made-up? What method would you recommend another writer use to do this kind of research on other topics?

      Sorry for the crapload of questions, but the urge to ask suddenly jumped me as I was re-reading the second chapter. In fact, the question of how to do research in general has been plaguing me for a while.

      ReplyDelete
    37. @ 2%

      Wikipedia has pretty much all you need (in a none academic sense). Google also helps, but my advice regarding that is use Wikipedia first to refine your search. Sometimes Wikipedia doesn't have the info you're looking for or doesn't have it in the detail you're looking for, but what it usually does have is the scientific names and more specific stuff that makes using it in a Google search all the easier. It that makes any kind of sense.
      For instance, all that fireworks mumbo jumbo came from wiki-ing pyrotechnics, flash powers, and other such stuff. The illegal stuff Fire Dazzler was using is typically used in military-grade decoy flares used to redirect heat seeking missiles. I figured that something that burns that hot and that bright would probably make for an interesting (if absurdly dangerous) light show.

      I hope that helps.

      ReplyDelete
    38. @Hephestus,

      I really enjoyed your fanfic. You managed to get Dr. Who (and the other sci-fi elements) to merge nicely into the MLP verse. Keep it up, and am looking forward to the next chapter!

      ReplyDelete
    39. Hephestus, Wow!

      Your work is incredible!! You have perfectly (PERFECTLY!) captured the 10th Doctor and all his subtleties! I can just imagine Tennant saying every single line you wrote. It all fits perfectly!

      Keep churning out good work! Can't wait for part 4!

      ReplyDelete
    40. Hey Hephestus, this is that same Anon that left you the really long critique on timelords and terror. I wish I could get my blogger account to work so you could identify me.
      But anyways, I love this so far. I don't have anything to say about the story component of your work so far besides that it’s awesome.
      Anyways, I mentioned spelling and grammar errors in your last story and you asked for examples, so I decided to keep a notepad file handy while I was reading this one, and I wrote down everything I caught. I could just post it here if you want, but if you would rather me send it to you by email or something so that nopony else sees it then I’ll do that. Waiting for your response.

      ReplyDelete
    41. You can post them in the comments, it's okay, it's all part of the learning experience.

      ReplyDelete
    42. @Hephestus

      You probably get this a lot, but any word on part 4? I don't want to seem like impatient, since rushing would likely diminish your wonderful work, I'm merely curious about how long a wait I have ahead.

      ReplyDelete
    43. Yes I was also going to ask about the update.

      Anyways, here it is, I copied the sentence that each error was in and then wrote the error I found (though I’m sure you could find them yourself if they’re all correct.)
      If any are mistakes then I apologize, I just put in everything I interpreted to be an error.

      chapter 1:
      'Sonic’d the reactor alloys, they’ll melt the second the get over 1% capacity!'
      third "the" should probably be "they"

      'A someone will probably get canned, though…'
      it looks like the "A" isn't supposed to be there

      'Ah know Professor. Sweet Apple Aches supplied the spirits, remember?'
      I'm guessing "Aches" is supposed to be "Acres"

      'what was once a bed, now a small mountain of blankets of pillows.'
      second "of" should probably be "and", unless you were making a weird metaphor or something

      'gravity and skill where on her side.'
      pretty sure "where" should be "were"

      '“Well, I’m bored. I wonder what Pinkie’s up to?'
      not sure why you used a question mark, but you do need a second quotation mark at the end


      chapter 2:
      'someone had written something to the affect of ‘neener-neener-neener’ in legalese.'
      'affect' should be 'effect', commonly confused words

      'Needless to say there was enough accusations and scandal to discredit the military into political obscurity for the next few centuries.'
      'was' should be 'were'

      'Fire Dazzler opened his mouth to retort before he was silence and was blown off his hooves by an explosive blast of energized air.'
      'he was silence' needs to be revised, you could replace 'silence' with 'silent' or 'silenced' or something like that

      'the mining had completely ceased its relentless pace for the fist time in fifteen years.'
      'fist' should be 'first'


      chapter 3:
      'Zeitgeist patted the soldier on the shoulder and sent him a way before turning back to The Doctor.'
      'a way' should be 'away'

      'I will see to it that no diamond dog breaths air within a hundred kilometers of this valley!'
      'breaths' should be 'breathes'

      'How is it that an industrious bunch like you diamond dogs haven’t spread father than you have?'
      'father' should probably be 'farther'

      ReplyDelete
    44. Just so everypony knows, I uploaded chapter 4 on thursday, but it's taking days to get on EqD, lots of traffic to sort through you see. From now on, if you want to get a look at the new chapters, I'll be posting them on Ponychan first, usually sending them to seth at the same time. But yeah, 4 is up, check it out and bump the thread!

      ReplyDelete
    45. Damn, didn't see the thread on ponychan, you should put a link in the comments when you post it.

      Yeah so I'm using a name url for now, here are the errors I got for this chapter:

      'Shock let out and exclamation of surprise as he trod over it, his legs tangling sending him tumbling in the dirt.'
      'and' should be 'an'
      also, there should be a comma or something between 'tangling' and 'sending'

      'Shock shook his head as soon as he got his bearings and looked up, the small purple dragon as he sat up rubbing his head.'
      I'm not sure what to make of this sentence, it needs to be revised

      'The was a hiss from behind as the little dragon shot up from the ground and landed on Shock’s back.'
      'The' should be 'There'

      'Hye Zecora! Yeah, well, something came up…'
      is 'Hye' supposed to be 'Hey'?

      ReplyDelete
    46. http://www.ponychan.net/chan/fic/res/15740.html
      Link to the Ponychan thread :)

      ReplyDelete
    47. In addition to Geekmuffin's post:

      In the scene where Gabbro is addressing the other Grundels, every instance of the word "purpose" was probably supposed to be "propose".

      '“What do you purpose? It was your policy..."'

      'I purpose we combat...'

      'The courtroom died down as Gabbro leaned forward to the amplifier. “I purpose that we see the diamond dogs..."'

      'I purpose this as our new target...'

      ReplyDelete
    48. @Geekmuffin

      'Shock shook his head as soon as he got his bearings and looked up, the small purple dragon as he sat up rubbing his head.'
      I'm not sure what to make of this sentence, it needs to be revised


      I think Hephestus was going for an absolute phrase there and omitted the participle by mistake.

      ReplyDelete
    49. Don't feel bad about all this grammar critique, Hephestus. Most fanfics I've read had way more mistakes in them.

      ReplyDelete
    50. @Geekmuffin
      Not at all, really it helps to make it as good as it can be. I'm grateful that you took the time!

      ReplyDelete
    51. So, Part 5 coming soon? Is it going to be the last chapter?

      ReplyDelete
    52. @Pony1Kenobi
      Soon and no. I'll try and get a rough draft posted late tonight or early tomorrow. Be sure to check the ponychan thread on Mines of Dragon Mountain for immediate updates because it usually takes a day or two to get up on EqD. So be sure to keep an eye out!

      ReplyDelete
    53. P.S. Does anyone know how to post functioning links over this messaging system? I posted an address for the ponychan MoDM but I would rather have a link up here. If anyone knows how, tell me how/post it. Thanks!

      ReplyDelete
    54. http://www.ponychan.net/chan/fic/res/15740.html
      chapter 5 up on the ponychan thread!

      ReplyDelete
    55. Hey, Hephestus!

      I must say that your fanfiction, both this and the previous one, are quite marvelous!

      I've been a fan of Doctor Who for some years now, and it's only been a week or two since I actually sat down and watched MLP:FM (Or however you shorten it.) and I must say I'm amazed at how well your stories adhere to both canons, while at the same time developing it further.

      The Doctor for the most part do sound like Tennant, the way of speaking is quite well translated into text, even if it seems a bit forced at some points.
      Likewise, you managed to expand on the MLP casts various abilities in a way that makes them feel Real. Generally no nonsense about how things just "are", but rather fleshing out the abilities and what makes it so special. All this only seem to work to make it more believable in a way I hadn't thought possible.

      It's been a long time since I got this thoroughly engrossed in a fanfic of any kind, so I'll be eagerly looking forward to the next instalment, because now I know that it'll definitively be worth reading!

      //Zanzibar

      ReplyDelete
    56. @Hephestus

      Alright, I've been stalking this story too long without talking about it, and that just wont do.

      I'm not gonna lie, at first I skimmed right over the first Doctor Whooves story you wrote. I just didnt think it was possible for a person to capter the true essence of what is 'The Doctor' Nobody can do that. Not in a million years.

      He's too random. Too charming. To... mad, to be captured. Or so, I thought. Your clever dialogue and amazing descriptive skills have captured the manic workings of the doctors mind perfectly! The stories you are writing about him are original and entertaining! You arent just throwing him into the MLP universe to see what happens, but you're throwing him into their universe and setting it up as if it were an actual episode of doctor who. (And you execute it perfectly, if I may add)

      I now find myself needing more of the stories you write. Please, tell me something:

      Do you plan on making more than just these two? or will there be many more?

      ReplyDelete
    57. @RenegadeProtagonist
      Thank you for the kind words! It really means a lot to me when someone tells me that they enjoyed my work! For the record there will probably be another episode after this one, and another after that, etc. I won't make any commitments, but I figure that if I've written two stories already, why not continue until as long as possible?
      Anyway, don't expect an update for 2 weeks or more, as I've recently had eye surgery, and extended periods of focus are not advised.

      Thanks for the support!

      ReplyDelete
    58. I think this story is capturing the spirit of the multi-part Doctor Who serials quite nicely.

      ReplyDelete
    59. @Hephestus
      Ouch, here's to a speedy recovery.

      Also, there's the Dash/Doctor moment I was waiting for. Huzzah!

      ReplyDelete
    60. Man I hate reading really good stories that aren't finished yet. I know trying to restrain myself until you finish the whole thing would be a lost cause though.

      Anyways, here's the stuff I caught in this chapter. It seems like either most of the errors are compacted into the final third of the story or I just don't watch as closely during the first part...


      'Rarity telekinetically tripped on and leapt onto his back'
      'on' should be 'one'

      'Y’know, if I didn’t know any better I’d say that the Duke has taken and interest in…er…‘equestrianism’.'
      'and' should be 'an'

      “Right then! There’ll time for mouth to mouth later-”
      unless he's just talking lazily it sounds like there should be a 'be' between 'There'll' and 'time'

      'The Grundel who spared me, Slag, came into my cell and told me some other ponies were here and if I would like to see them.'
      I avoid correcting grammar in dialogue, but you should probably put an 'asked' between the 'and' and 'if', or something like that so it makes more sense

      ‘Aah! Please! Don’t hurt me! It’s not my fault!”
      you used different quotation marks on either side of this dialogue

      ReplyDelete
    61. Hrm. I gotta say this chapter ends a little abruptly.

      ReplyDelete
    62. @Anonymous
      Yeah, couldn't be helped. I had an upcoming surgery, and I really wanted to get it done and uploaded ASAP. I'll add to it later, or streamline it.

      ReplyDelete
    63. FYI
      I added a bit onto the end of chapter five that should make it seem more like a concluded story and not an abrupt stop. Enjoy!

      ReplyDelete
    64. No new errors, and a much better ending. You are absolutely brilliant my friend, you should really look into professional writing.

      ReplyDelete
    65. Hephestus,
      I must say that you've done a remarkable job at capturing the feel of Doctor Who, and of characterizing the Tenth Doctor, complete with his personality quirks. Both this and "Time Lords and Terror" flow like the episodes of the serial, with very similar pacing, suspense, and humor. Although I'm not really a fan of MLP (heretical thing to say here, I know), this has been a thoroughly enjoyable pair of stories to read through. I'm looking forward to seeing how this one shakes out.
      A little out of place here, but: in TL&T, the Doctor's triple "What?!" in Part 1 brought to my mind his reaction to the Titanic smashing through the TARDIS at the conclusion of "Last of the Time Lords". I could see him giving exactly the same kind of reaction there.

      With the way things went down in Part 5, Tirac seems awfully familiar. Given his behavior and especially his comments, I'm starting to think that we may have seen him previously in The Impossible Planet and The Satan Pit. If that is true, then his unpleasant encounter with the black hole at the end of those episodes must have landed him in ancient Equestria, and that kind of visitor I wouldn't wish even on my enemies. I'm curious to see how the Doctor is going to manage to get through this one, given that he doesn't seem to have another black hole handy (though on the other hand, that might result in some other poor soul down the line having Tirac land on their doorstep).

      All in all, you, sir, are Brilliant!
      -Eric

      ReplyDelete
    66. Oh man Im jonesing for more!

      ReplyDelete
    67. Hephestus, what you've made here is simply awesome. I can't even to begin to describe the feelings I felt when I read through your first Doctor Who fanfic. It honestly felt like a real episode of Doctor Who, and near the end of chapter four, I felt like I was indeed watching an episode of the show. The technobabble and the characterization is great all around. If I ever write a Who fanfic I can only hope it ends nearly as well.

      Of which speaking, I was thinking about settling down and writing a crossover involving Eleven in Equestria. I was wondering if you had any pointers on Doctor Who fiction and writing in general.

      Response or no, this story is going to keep me busy for awhile.

      Thanks for the brilliant story,
      Blake

      ReplyDelete
    68. @Lennora
      Thank you for the kind words! It's comments like that that really get my writing mojo going! Keep checking EqD for chapter six, I uploaded partial chapter 6 a few days ago, so it should be up any day now!

      As for writing your own fic, I would say the easiest thing to do would be to re-watch all (and I do mean all) of the Eleventh Doctor's episodes to date. When you write lines for him, try to imagine Matt Smith saying the lines with all his breathless enthusiasm and nerdiness, that way you can more easily convince the reader that they're reading Eleven and not FanFic Eleven.
      The same goes for every other character you plan to write; watch their episodes, multiple times if need be, and try your best to write in their 'voice'.
      That's the best advice I can offer for convincing dialogue/interaction, I hope it helps!

      ReplyDelete
    69. @Hephestus
      Thank you very much. I only just started chapter three of Dragon Mountain when I decided to refresh the page and check to see if you commented. I'm glad that I was able to get some of the creative juices flowing, because I can't wait for more.

      As for the advice, that helped me a lot. Honestly, that's what I was afraid of the most, that I wouldn't get Eleven down right, that I would make him come out cheesy and just... wrong. I'm going to try and steer clear of the mane six, seeing as that many characters all at once might overwhelm me. What I plan on doing is rewatching episodes, then watching the first new episode that comes on this Saturday. After which, I'll try and write it up. I already have a few plot ideas, but unfortunately, they're just that, ideas.

      Again, thank you for writing such great stories, and thank you for the advice. I just don't want to make this story I'm planning a 'fic' but more of proper episodes of Doctor Who. Either way, I want it to turn out good. As a huge fan of the show I don't want to slightly ruin it with bad writing.

      I hope it's not forward to ask, but I was wondering if you had another way for me to contact you if I needed some more help. Also, I think I'd like you to be one of the pre-readers, considering your great stories.

      Anyways, that's my rambling done. Again, sorry if it sounded odd for me to ask for a way to contact you.

      Can't wait for part six,
      Blake

      ReplyDelete
    70. This comment has been removed by the author.

      ReplyDelete
    71. If commenting is sure to result in chapter 6 then you must comment! Sun Tsu said that, and I'd say he knows a little more about commenting than you do pal, because he invented it! And then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of meaningless internet debates.

      (I finally got my blogger account to work! *inhale* ..yay)

      ReplyDelete
    72. Okay, this is weird. I sent the chapter to Seth on the 13th! From now on, could everyone just check the ponychan thread for updates, seeing as how EqD seems to be a little overloaded/slow. I'll still post it here so that everyone can give it a score and comment, but if you want to read it now, go to the Mines of Dragon Mountain thread on Ponychan, because it's up (albeit slightly incomplete)
      It would be nice to have a way to get this word out to everyone, and not just people who check this page AND read the comments...

      ReplyDelete
    73. I'm a bit suprised that Litigia was willing to cook lamb. Wouldn't they be sentient in this setting?

      ReplyDelete
    74. @God
      Tartary Lamb is a mythical form of plant that grew it's own sheep which would then eat all the weeds around it. The lamb would be non-sentient/non-living in this case. I think it fits in with the whole Mythical-Things-R-Us feel of Equestria.

      ReplyDelete
    75. Dude...bad-a$$ Twilight is freakin' awesome.

      ReplyDelete
    76. It was all I could do not to squee in the middle of my US History class when I saw this updated.

      Reading now...

      ReplyDelete
    77. I squeed so hard at the reveal of Tirac. Seriously Hephestus, you are an awesome Doctor writer. My many hats are tipped in your favor.

      ReplyDelete
    78. I'm posting the new error corrections in the ponychan thread now btw.

      ReplyDelete
    79. @Hephestus

      Your writing is simply astonishing, the sheer quality and quantity of intricate detail crammed into every paragraph makes my head spin! To even contemplate such a vast array of information, each piece so elegantly slipped into the narrative without once rippling its even flow. And then there are the multifarious pieces of Equestrian history and origin, exposing the streaks of darkness in the world, and as has often happened in the series, there's the Doctor, the one who accidentally caused it all... it's so brilliantly constructed it's beyond me. I am a struggling writer myself, a scientist by trade and rather intelligent. But this... this and the previous story are works of literary genius. I fear I can never hope to rise to this level! It's bordering on the fantastically rich qualities of Tolkien's worlds and possesses more than just inklings of the sardonic wit of Roald Dahl in just the right places. I have read other fanfics that were quite excellent, but here and there were weaknesses. I find none here. Perhaps there are, but I am so drawn into the story and characters that I don't even notice them. The only character that comes off singly one-dimensional is the Devil himself... and, well, he IS pure Evil after all! Speaking of which, I realized who Tirac was after the first mention of his meeting the Doctor before. I had long suspected that there existed several methods by which he could return. The one you chose was an elegant and perfect adaptation of one of them, blending both the scientific nuances and the mythical into an immensely pleasing explanation. And so many other little things excited me: Pinkie Pie's always inexplicable ability to know what shouldn't be known, Twilight's true power emerging once more, and the Doctor's duality of being, his brightness, goodness, and cheerfulness; his deep pain, age, and wisdom. Ah, if I had time to re-read it and make note of everything I should end up writing an entire book composed of praise! Of course there are a few grammar issues here and there, but for goodness sake, EVERY writer misses a few things. Even Tolkien, the master of language and storytelling, was editing his masterpiece until he died. Your stories DESERVE publication, for nothing less than the fact that they are phenomenal works of literature. Certainly far superior to another "Twilight", which I loath equally as much as I love our dear MLP Twilight.

      ReplyDelete
    80. I seriously lol'd so hard when Tirac told Spike to post his 'story' to ED and get 6 stars. Bravo.

      ReplyDelete
    81. Huh. I thought Tirec would have been destroyed at the end of part six. After all, it wasn't an attack made in anger, it was a move made to ensure the survival of thousands. Oh well.

      ReplyDelete
    82. Oops, I guess I didn't make it clear that he wasn't under the mountain. If anything the energy needed to open the tunnel should have killed him, but he's a wily one!

      ReplyDelete
    83. Heh, I've long wondered what would happen to the poor ponies if they encountered a, let us say, less gentle and innocent culture than their own (like Stirling's Draka). Most of these thoughts ended very badly for the people of Equestria.

      After seeing what Twilight and her friends were able to do here, I think some of my worries were very, very wrong.

      ReplyDelete
    84. @Hephestus

      Each chapter you've posted continues to be as enjoyable to read as the last. Bravo on keeping the Doctor (and the other Mane Cast) still very much in character. You've also continued to do well at capturing the Doctor's signature style of humor. When I was reading the parts in the last couple of chapters where the Doctor and Spike took advantage of Tirac's overpowering tendency to act like your stereotypical Vaudeville Villian (and other words that begin with V), it was hard not to bust out laughing out loud (a college study hall isn't the best place for rofl's, after all).

      On an aside, something that needs to be said. Much earlier in the comments section here (July 27th if you're curious), I said the following:
      Quote: "Although I'm not really a fan of MLP (heretical thing to say here, I know)..."
      Yeah, that needs to be amended. In the months since then, I've become an avid fan of MLP:FiM, and your Dr. Whooves fanfics were responsible for the initial exposure.
      Confound you, Hephestus, you've driven me to brony! ;)

      - Eric

      ReplyDelete
    85. @Unknown
      Glad to hear it! If I can generate interest for either show I know I've done my job!

      ReplyDelete
    86. @Alondro
      Thanks for the kind words, it really makes my day! I'm glad you've been enjoying my writing, believe me when I say it's been a pleasure writing it!

      ReplyDelete
    87. Link to chapter 8 is actually a copy of chapter 1... :/

      ReplyDelete
    88. Magnificent.

      Simply Magnificent.

      Best work on Equestria Daily by far. Keep the good work and AllONS-Y.

      ReplyDelete
    89. Chapter 8 y u no exist?

      Silly chapter 2, you're not chapter 8.

      ReplyDelete
    90. @linkkb
      It's actually the entire fic in one doc.

      ReplyDelete
    91. "Chapter 8" is really just all the chapters in one big document, for some reason.

      I loved the hell out of this story; the existing characters were perfectly in-character and the original characters integrated perfectly into the cast, the worldbuilding was interesting and believable, the plot was something I wanted to learn more about, and everything about Tirac, especially the flashback to his defeat, was awesome and totally metal.

      About the only parts I disliked were the fourth-wall breaking comments from Spike about cartoons and EqD, and that, while it was pretty metal, some of the stuff Tirac did was way too gory for Dr. Who, much less ponies. Still, that's a minor complaint.

      ReplyDelete
    92. Oh-ho! You've finished it! Fantastic, I've been looking forward to this ever since I read your last one...and thank you for posting the whole story in one doc (I read offline and this makes it so much easier).

      ReplyDelete
    93. You know, with the doctor staying put for a while, I think we're going to see this universes version of Discord.

      ReplyDelete
    94. @Hephestus
      I was wandering the science building on campus just before class, when a name in a case of rock specimens jumped out at me. I thought, "Wait a minute, that can't be... oh, yes it is! What?!" A quick Wikipedia later confirmed it:
      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabbro
      I saw what you did there! Nice touch! :D

      -Eric

      ReplyDelete
    95. Rule #1: the doctor lies. As soon as the tardis is empty, he should leave. Maybe come back in a while, but he doesn't stay in one place. As tempting as it sounds to him, he simply can't do it.

      ReplyDelete
    96. Hephestus, you have single-hoofedly turned me into a Dr. Who fan with your stories. You, sir or madam, are awesome.

      ReplyDelete
    97. I saw this story completed on the 25th and never read it, thinking "meh". Now, almost a month later I stumbled across "Timelords and Terror" and I found myself frantically struggling to find this quickly. And now...I read. ALLONS-Y!

      ReplyDelete
    98. @Hephestus
      I've absolutely loved both stories you've written, they way everything was handled was absolutely beautiful, the characterisation, the interactions between everyone, the villains...
      Just bravo across the board. I only have one small question: Is there a possibility for another sequel, or does the Doctor Whooves saga end here? I hope it will continue, as these are undoubtedly not only two of the finest DW/MLP fanfics ever written, but two of the finest stories I've ever read anywhere.

      ReplyDelete
    99. @Charlemagne2011
      I'll probably get to work on episode 3 when the school year starts to wind down, but until then don't expect too much noise from me. Trust me, if I intended to leave it off here I would have used a more climactic ending, so there will be more in the future!

      ReplyDelete
    100. Oh, wow! Just wow! Seriously, I could NOT have been more enthralled by this story! Every chapter had me on the edge of my seat! And for added effect, I played the Season 4 intro when the story told me to! PLEASE, Hephestus, write more, if the inspiration hits you! ALLONS-Y!!

      ReplyDelete
    101. hell yes its done and im almost on season 5 of doctor who

      ReplyDelete
    102. Oh god. Did Discord just put Tirac into SCREWBALL?!

      ReplyDelete
    103. OH HELL YES!! Cool opening for a possible continuation. Personally, I always thought that the 3rd story of this series would continue the tradition of remastered G1 pony movie villians by featuring either Catalina or Grogar.

      ReplyDelete
    104. "There would be no stoping him this time". Tirac's dumb, that's as bad as saying "it can't get any worse".

      ReplyDelete
    105. @FredFredNineNine

      Certainly! But know that it will probably be a while until I actually start writing. School and stuff. Rest assured I'm definitely going keep going, season two if giving me all kinds of ideas!

      ReplyDelete
    106. One of the links is mislabeled. The google doc you linked as Chapter 8 is the complete story, epilogue and all.

      Would of been nice to know the full one was there, I just went about downloading all the other chapters individually so I can compile them into one PDF for my iPhone, and then I notice chapter 8's title says 'Complete'.

      ReplyDelete
    107. @Kanzuke
      Yeah, not much I can do about that I'm afraid. I sent it to them saying it was the whole thing on one doc and they labeled it chapter eight *shrug*

      ReplyDelete
    108. So, are Terra and Radian still alive and active?

      They exist in another plane and decided to not act in the war so his daughters could live free or something?

      And if so, what was the danger of Tirac be free, I mean, why would the Planet be in danger, that even if it escaped it would have instantly to face the entire might of his old enemies when he was at his weakest?

      I don't know, but the Epilogue really steal a lot of the weight and drama from the mission of the Mane six and the Doctor, for having such an Eus Dex Equina at hoof.

      I liked the speculation that both Radian and Terra had died eons ago, not long after the fight with Tirac, just like the other gods and it was now only the new generations and their Gods who where the only thing standing in it's way. That make it more epic, specially after you showed what it was needed to stop Tirac in the past and how brutal the war was even when having such a might at their disposal.

      Also, by reading it would mean that both of their parents are far stronger than the pricesses, isn't?

      Finally, what was the Doctor doing during Discord rampage? Was he with the mane cast or was word by word like the series?

      ReplyDelete
    109. @Antiguo
      Alright!

      1. Yes, they still exist. But they're out and about in the universe, choosing instead to leave their own daughters as the overseers of the happiest place in the universe (no-one really knows about Tirac due to the threat even knowledge of his existence poses)

      2. If Tirac's first plan had worked he would have been restored to a point where he would once again have been a threat, also the whole imbuing Spike with Calcipher's heart thing would have made him even more powerful than before. However, due to the nature of the events at the end of the epilogue, Tirac is only now at a state where Radian and Terra could conclusively trounce him.

      3. It was always my intention to have Tirac escape. Makes for a great story, that. Having a character like Discord introduced into canon was simply my way of connecting my story to season two.

      4. The war with Tirac essentially was the gotterdammerung for the MLP universe, with all but the two most powerful surviving. Also, Radian and Terra have taken to sweetening up the rest of the MLP universe in order to prevent another Tirac from potentially emerging, so either way they would have been too late in stopping Tirac back on Equestria.

      5. In terms of traditional elemental god(desse)s, I always pictured Lulu and Tia being Gravity/Newtonian Avatars, what with the controlling the motion of planets and stars. This, of course, gives them the potential to be incredibly powerful, at least as powerful as their parents. However, keep in mind that they are a 'mere' half-a-million years old (in my stories anyway) as opposed to multiple billions of years of life and experience belonging to beings like their parents and Tirac. So it's kind of like saying a someone will always be weaker than someone else just because they're a toddler and the other person is an adult, it's just a matter of time.

      6. I was going to answer all these questions in episode (whatever episode I plan on picking this story up again. But I can see how these things may impact someone's enjoyment of the story, so I answered them now. This question however, well you'll just have to wait.

      Glad you enjoyed Mines of Dragon Mountain everyone, it was a pleasure writing it!

      ReplyDelete
    110. This comment has been removed by the author.

      ReplyDelete
    111. ok, now that I got the posting thing figured out...

      Just wanted to say I am LOVING these stories, JUST finished Time Lords and Terror, and looking forward to this one. (stupid morning shifts making me have to get to bed early) And really, I have just got to tell you how amazing you are. Everything just works so great in you story, all the characters pretty much felt just like they do on TV, granted it was a bit grimdark for MLP, but it fit's perfectly as a Doctor Who episode, which it really did feel like.

      Really REALLY hoping you keep this up and write several more episodes, least I still got this one to keep me occupied tomorrow.

      ReplyDelete
    112. 5 Stars for the story up to chapter 7, but I was no big fan of the epilogue. It seemed to make the victory a bit pointless, would have preferred if Discord really just came to mock Tirac but implying that Discord is now the villain to be afraid of. I guess you have more plans with Tirac though, so you did what you had to.

      I'm not sure why Zecora was in the story, she felt a bit like a fifth wheel at times and I often forgot she was there at all. Twilight and Spike however were well written and an angry Twilight scene is always nice :) The Doctor seemed a bit clueless too often though, while it gave chances for other characters like Fluttershy to bring their part, it diminished a bit too much of the Doctor's own abilities.

      ReplyDelete
    113. @Nyte_Crawler
      Not sure, this year of Uni has been pretty brutal and I fear I may not have the mojo to get another Doctor Whooves episode going. Trust me, no one's more disappointed at this development than me since I always had a hoot writing these.
      Never say die though! It could just be a rut. I hope it's just a rut...

      However, I have resumed work on a new Crossover fic called The Corridor. I'll be posting it on fanfiction.net and a couple SciFi forums. If you like how I've blended these two universes, you may like what I'm doing with Legend of the Galactic Heroes and Star Trek.

      ReplyDelete
    114. @Hephestus

      Aw, pony feathers.

      Well, I wish you luck. I honestly believe this is the best fanfic in the fandom. Not blowing smoke, the fact that Past Sins gets all the press and no on mentions this more is criminal, I think. I DESPERATELY want a new chapter, but this story is worth waiting for. Hope things clear up for you!

      ReplyDelete
    115. @JakeTheArmyGuy
      Thanks for the kind words! If this thing turns out to be just a rut, you'll all find out soon. I'm going to be doing quite a bit of writing this summer, but I have yet to decide what on. Maybe the last episodes of season 2 will be the inspiration I need?

      Anyway, thanks again for the support. I'm glad I could entertain.

      ReplyDelete
    116. @Hephestus

      First off, I really love the work you've done on your 'Whooves-verse' If I'm honest, I would say it would be the first piece of fanfiction that made me take the medium seriously.

      I was just wondering if it would be at all possible to make use of Stardust and your take on DD society in my own fic-verse. It would amount to little more than a shoutout and reference made to him but I feel you've done such an awesome bit of world building that it would be awesome to make use of 'The Thin White Duke'

      Here's my own bit of EQD featured fanfic to give you a sense of my style and the setting: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/42260/Britannia-and-the-Holy-Hoof-Grenade

      Thanks very much for putting your creative energy into this work. It was immensely fun to read, I loved the references and in-jokes and your melding of the whoniverse and Equestria really works.

      ReplyDelete
    117. @Philip Haslam
      Sure! I stake no claim to any of my Characters/Concepts, they are free for you and anyone else to use.
      Thanks for the kind words, I'm certain your work will be great. Just let me know if you want any pointers/constructive criticism, and I'll be happy to offer it!

      ReplyDelete
    118. @Hephestus

      If you wish to give I'd be more than happy to take on board.

      ReplyDelete
    119. @Philip Haslam
      I'll have to read it first, but yeah, I'll put together an account at Fimfiction and give you my two cents. Or did you have something else in mind?
      Also, feel free to use whatever you like however you like. As far as I'm concerned, anything I contribute to the MLP fanon/fandom belongs to the fandom.

      ReplyDelete
    120. @Hephestus

      A noble sentiment. After all the MLP universe isn't outs to begin with. Still, I felt it only polite to ask.

      The piece I linked is really my only stuff out there at the moment and as I have this grand narrative I'm working towards, critique from someone like yourself would be wonderful.

      ReplyDelete