Author: Vanner
Description: When Fluttershy asked Rarity where she learned to sew, she learns that remembering where you came from isn't always easy.Carousel
Additional Tags: Family, Rarity's sewing, generosity, history
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Story: Carousel
Author: Vanner
Additional Tags: Family, Rarity's sewing, generosity, history
36 comments:
Hey, a story about somebody's parents that doesn't have them being abusive jackasses! Who'd a thunk.
here's a quote for you :D
it's very appropriate for father's day weekend
Watery eyes on my end. 5/5
How many Pre-Readers do you have?
And damn i remember that episode...
I think i might actually read the theories from the fans about the mane six's origins
Twilight is the Main,MAIN character so people can't make up theories about her origins
Rarity, Pinkie And Rainbow Dash on the other hand...
Rarity is a Unicorn in Ponyville which is kinda rare
I Still think Pinkie is adopted, due to her colors, and saying about her (real)granny in episode 1 to face her fears
Rainbow Dash? Looks like your typical rebel, running/leaving from home to aim for her dreams.
Kinda like AppleJack with her story in Cutie Mark Chronicles
Goddamnit! I knew the basis of the story from the third page, but my god, this story is amazing, it brought tears to my eyes more than once. Excellent writing in general 5/5
I caught a mistake or two, but over it was a very well written story. Not quite fitting of the sad tag though.
Hmm...a Family Business story?
I agree on the tag. If Rarity had ended up devastated or worse off at the end then I could see it marked sad, but this read more normal to me than anything. Rarity's a tough pony to work with for me, but you seem to be doing admirably with her.
The only problem I had was that if all this was a flashback she should have been younger and treated as such. You generally wouldn't ask a thirteen year old if they were sleeping around. I know Rarity is often considered the most mature of the mane six, but she was younger when all this was taking place. I'm curious how you envisioned her age when this took place.
Still, I liked the overall arc of how Rarity came to take over her father's business and make it her own. I would have liked the mother to be a little more sympathetic, particularly given that she seemed to care for Carousel and he was dying as well, but it wasn't critical. All in all, very enjoyable.
Sad is pretty loose here, as already stated; it's a normal/sad combination, in my opinion. Sad mostly because of the mood and atmosphere through the whole fic and Rarity attempting to... well, get laid, was very distressing for her.
Overall, I really liked it. It was a mostly tell-and-show-less fic, but I think that worked to it's advantage; what mattered to Rarity is her father, the shop, and what they did and what she did. You slowed down parts that were necessary and dialog/thoughts supported emotions very well. I do prefer to see more vibrant descriptions or dialog descriptions but it worked very well for what it was. Five stars easy.
That was beautiful. That's all I can say. :')
That was very well written. I could feel tears swelling up toward the end, but that's beside the point.
My only gripe is the Sweetie Belle situation. I'm very positive that in the show, they have Sweetie living at Rarity's shop with her. Rarity was basically raising Sweetie by her self, from what I gathered.
Regardless, it was exceptionally well written. Five Stars.
@Somber
Well, I'm not sure if the author intended it that way, but horse aging does work different than with us.
If I am not mistaken, horses reach sexual maturity quite soon, so technically it'd be possbile for Rarity to sleep around at what we consider a young age.
Of course, this is the first thing that popped into my head.
Anyway, this story was quite touching. That Rarity.... :')
Must... Not.. Tear up...
This is the best story concept I've seen here in a while, and the writing is solid. Rarity's dad is exactly what you'd expect, given how his daughter turned out. Excellent work!
My only complaint is that it's pretty easy to see the shape of the entire story from early on. The only potential surprise is the disaster at the celebration, but Rarity outright spoils that in the framing story.
Amazing fic. Carousel is now canon, at least for me.
5/5
Would make sense on why she named her store "Carousel Boutique".
About Sweetie Belle, she doesn't live with her sister. Rarity just has her over a lot of the time.
Thanks for the feedback. This is my first piece of fan-fiction, and I'm glad you all like it.
Sad but wonderful story here.
For some reason some stories won't let me give them star ratings... it.s weird, I'm not sure what's wrong.
5 years. If the target demographic for this show was just 5 years higher, this would have made the perfect plot for an episode of the show. Its quite a shame. Fantastic little story.
My only real problem with it is that Rarity seems to be acting a touch older than she supposedly is supposed to be. I'm not talking just about the bit with Figaro after Rarity liquored up, but her general thought processes and emotions.
This took place before the events depicted in the flashback in CMC, but with Rarity's maturity level and her actions it seems like it would fit better if it took place in between the flashback and the show proper.
Manly tears were shed. Well done.
@ Pinkemon
I suppose so. I could see rarity doing this now or in the future with no problems, but as it's happening in the past it arched my brow. Call me a prude. :P
@TenchiFreak5
The events of the story, except for the first flashback, are supposed to take place a few years after the CMC flashbacks, and a few years before the show starts. Basically, a high school aged Rarity.
I probably should have made that clearer, which is what I'll do if I write further stories.
Beautiful...*sniff*...Beautiful
I... loved this story.
It's sad. In a good way. I seriously wanna give Rarity a big hug now. :<
This was an amazing story. I cried, I love Rarity, and this was just beautiful.
Another one of those fics so well written, that with edits by the staff, would make a great episode in the show. 5 stars from me, bravo!
A little frayed around the edge, but still oh so very sad. ;(
Absolutely fantastic. Perfect read for Father's Day. Going to go appreciate my pops now.
@Vanner
*rereads second flashback*
Oh. Well, never mind then. My mistake.
That was a wonderful bittersweet fanfiction. I love bittersweet.
I cannot remember ever crying at fiction, but this made my eyes watery a the end. Very well written.
So very lovely, and a delight to read. I enjoyed seeing someone with a past that had some tears without turning it all into a nightmare. Five stars.
~Ardashir
Oh! her father's name was Carouse... oh...... yeah... like Atnas said.
Saw the dying father bit coming from really early on, but I suspect the author was intending for us to figure that out long before the younger Rarity did.
Naming the shop after her father seems a very in-character action for Rarity to take.
There may not be many authors trying to write about Rarity, but the few who are are doing a damn good job.
@Roxor
Totally agreed. I really thought the story was very touching and everything was kept quite canon. Excellent!
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