• Pinkie's Saucy Chocolate Chaos Crisis

    Pinkie's Saucy Chocolate Chaos Crisis
    By: Blueshift

    When a pony reaches a certain age,
    a switch goes off, we turn the page.
    No more longing for foalish things,
    But taxes and jobs and apron strings.

    Pinkie was not like that, of course,
    Age just developed her love of sauce.
    On cheese and cranberry she'd go to town,
    But best of all was chocolate brown.
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    Chocolate sauce she'd guzzle all day long,
    Letting it slip and slide down her tongue.
    The older Pinkie Pie did get,
    The more developed this gluttonous threat.

    "Oh Pinkie, Pinkie, don't be greedy,"
    Her friend did cry as she ate quite speedy.
    Gulping down a big warm vat,
    Not caring if it made her fat.

    "Silly Twilight, I'm quite fine,"
    Pinkie would say all of the time.
    But oh reader, was she right?
    Her clothes were becoming a bit too tight!

    Disaster struck - oh day of dread!
    Ponyville was out of chocolate spread.
    No more syrup or chocolate powder,
    Pinkie had run out of chowder!

    "A spell! A spell!" she cried to Twilight,
    "Magic me chocolate, solve my plight!
    Twilight's will was broken, she did the deed,
    Casting sorcery so Pinkie could feed.

    It went wrong of course (doesn't it always?),
    Though lifted Pinkie from her malaise.
    Chocolate sprung up around the mare's feet,
    All she touched turned brown and sweet.

    "This is great," Pinkie cried eating a mouthful of goo,
    "I'll never run out, it's all thanks to you!"
    She leaned forwards to hug her dear friend,
    But alas - her chocolate touch saw Twilight's end!

    Pinkie stared in horror at the chocolate statue
    "Twilight, I'm sorry, I turned you to fondue!"
    Maybe with this magic I was too hasty,
    But... om nom nom, You ares quite tasty!"

    Pinkie ran out into the town,
    Very soon the streets ran with brown.
    "My friends, my friends, I'm sorry you perish!"
    Pinkie snacked on their bodies, the taste she did cherish.

    A desolate wasteland was Ponyville left,
    Of life and fun and joy was bereft
    Chocolate ponies and houses, in no way nutritious
    It was pretty bad - but it was also delicious!

    Celestia flew down from the skies up above,
    Fixing the mess with magic and love!
    "Pinkie, you fool! I don't want to quarrel,
    Don't do it again - did you learn a moral?"

    Pinkie sighed, covered in sauce
    "I feel like I am a troublesome horse!
    Thank you for fixing this terrible curse,
    But as problems go... it could be worse!"

    Gentle reader take heed of this harrowing tale,
    Don't be like Pinkie and do a food fail.
    I hope this story caused you disquiet
    You can't live on chocolate - vary your diet!