Listen, music is no laughing matter. There are notes and beats and rhythms, and if you're not careful one or all of them could come screaming right out of the dark at you and snap your neck clean off. Arpeggios have long been likened to voracious predators. This is why. That cuddly little scale you brought home from the pet shop is going to grow up someday, and what will the neighbors think when you've let that Diminuendo sneak away onto the streets again? Somepony could get hurt!
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why you need me. Give me your wild, untamed musics and I shall make order out of chaos. Just... remember to fill out the proper paperwork, first. You don't want Mrs. Rivers going public with your little secret, do you? I thought not.