[Sad][Normal]
(Note: Story No Longer on Hiatus!)
-Note: Apparently the wrong link went up, so reposting with the good one!
Author: Big Mackintosh
Description: After being adopted by Derpy, Sparkler can't help but feel unloved and unspecial in her new home, but Derpy is determined to show her just how special she really is.
All links below the break!
My Sweetie Part 1
My Sweetie Part 2
My Sweetie Part 3
My Sweetie Part 4
My Sweetie Part 5
My Sweetie Part 6
My Sweetie Part 7
My Sweetie Part 8
My Sweetie: Magic Isn't My Thing Part 1
My Sweetie: Magic Isn't My Thing Part 2
My Sweetie: Magic Isn't My Thing Part 3
My Sweetie: Magic Isn't My Thing Part 4
My Sweetie: Magic Isn't My Thing Part 5 (New!)
Additional Tags: depressed filly adopted for love
Author Apology (New!)
"BigMackintosh here, presenting the end of the story at last! I'd like to apologise for the length of time this has taken. It has been an incredibly long time coming and I have admittedly had plentiful opportunity to make it so. But like many, life has got in the way. The fandom has presented me multiple opportunities to take to new forms of works such as art and media which have equally taken my time. I have found many friends through the fandom and even the love of my life. So while this may the last you hear of me as an author, it will never be the last you see of me as a member among you all. Thank you all for your patience, please enjoy the story as much as I have enjoyed writing it!"
Fan Art
277 comments:
@GaruuSpike Thanks so much ^^ I know some things might seem a bit off in terms of the writing style, but I'm from northern Ireland, I'm still having trouble writing outside of the norm at times so please bear with me :P
ReplyDeleteOh, I also want to say that I absolutely ADORE the premise that Derpy is an incredibly intelligent mare, and is fully capable of, if even surpassing, the thought processes of a normal pony, but verbal communication is hindered by a speech impediment caused by irreversible brain damage from a near-fatal childhood injury.
ReplyDeleteIt is now in my head canon that Derpy is an absolute genius, but she's trapped in a body where she can't speak her mind. The Derpy that was talking to Sparkler after she read that letter, and the Derpy who WROTE the letter, almost seem like two different ponies. But they're not; Derpy can WRITE whatever she wants, and in any format she wants, it's just that her brain won't allow her to speak it. It's.... an awesome concept. Bravo, my friend.
Just read your second story, brilliant! I confess it was exciting to find out you decided to expand on your story. It looks like Sparkler's magic lies in cosmetics. A rather interesting direction for you to take it. I can't wait to see where else you take her little adventure. I know something has to start building for the story.
ReplyDeleteYou wrote my headcanon.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure if you have an editor, but by the looks of the story, apparently you still don't. An editor's job is to look over the story and fix spelling/grammar errors. They don't change the plot or anything. xD
ReplyDeleteIf you need one, I'm open. I'm very good at sentence structure & grammar. What I'm NOT good at is plotwriting. But hey, I'm not writing the story here; you are.
If you need an editor, drop me a line at crysal1010@gmail.com.
OMG YESH!!!
ReplyDeleteAnother chapter?..... I've only recorded up to part 4.....
ReplyDeleteThis story is amazing. I just read all of it (ALL OF IT!) in one go, and it's brilliant. I feel compelled to say what I liked about it so much, but in all honesty I can't narrow it down. And now there's another story? -_-
ReplyDeleteLet's see, that makes, what, fifteen stories I'm following now? Man, I need a hobby.
@GaruuSpike that would be fantastic! I have another proof reader at the minute but the more second opinions i can get the better! I'll send part 2 when its finished, but that might be a week or so, im backed up with tumblr answers, including your own :S
ReplyDeleteYohohohohoho! Such an explosion of comments. Author: Big Mackintosh, I am going to read every bit of this story from the beginning again. But what I'm going to do this time (that I should have done the first time) is write my thoughts down and use them to post my next comment. I will more then likely do this every so often once these stories reach a certain point, continuing to read this story over and over again. And I fully agree with those who have said it, this is now my headcanon (if that was the correct term). I may even treat some of my thoughts as if they're letters to Derpy herself, or perhaps even to Dinky or Sparkler, but as of right now that's just a thought in and of itself.
ReplyDeleteSparkler's magic/special talent being related to cosmetics? (despite future disasters that it might cause)
ReplyDeleteI'm totally okay with this.
*headcanon'd*
When is Part 2 of "Magic Isn't My Thing" coming out?
ReplyDelete@N.1.S. its almost done, when it is just got to have it proof read :D
ReplyDelete@Big mackintosh
ReplyDeleteI'm very curious to know what you think of the Derpy's screen time in the episode "The Last Roundup"? Personally I'm rather upset about the way they portrayed her. As far as I'm conserned, Derpy is the way she is in "My Sweetie" and that's it. That's the way she needs to be.
Btw, still waiting for part 2 of "Magic Isn't My Thing". It's driving me nuts waiting.
@N.1.S. im working on the final touches right now. it will be up today for sure! and as for her depiction the way i see it is this: my work is a fanon. if i could have it my way i would love it but all in all this is a kid's cartoon and the fact they even went as far into the fanbase for us as they have shows they care for us big time. i liked her depiction because from a kids point of view she looks like a silly character so a silly persona was a good way to go. im kind of pleased with it but am adamant that derpy in 'my sweetie' will NOT change at all :D
ReplyDeletenice update!
ReplyDeleteyay now derpy is a filly and im guessing she is going to go to school with dinky like in the cutie pox episode. I'm right aren't I?
ReplyDeleteand then derpy was a filly, and everyone's heart exploded thrice.
ReplyDelete@Big mackintosh frankly I don't see your depiction completely unsupported by the show. Derpy is clumsy but thats due to her eyes. She speaks slow which indicates to my mind a former speech impediment not any real slowness of thought. Dinky was shown in the bottom window just below derpy on the train, the only detail that is fanon that does not seem to pursue your story is if I interpreted right... Dinky seemed to have a dad in the audience with her. That does not preclude Derpy from being her mom but it does change the family dynamic.
ReplyDeleteI blacked out a bit until the smoke cleared, and then a filly Ditzy (I'm sticking to the 'Derpy is her nickname' theory). I blacked out again.
ReplyDeleteWell, Derpy did want to look a bit younger. I just don't think she wanted a couple decades taken off. This one looks like it might be able to go for at least one or two more parts.
ReplyDeleteThat being said I just started rereading "My Sweetie" from the very beginning and I started typing down my thoughts to go along with each part. I'll have them posted all in succession once I've gone all the way through "My Sweetie" and I'll do the same thing for "Magic Isn't My Thing". It should take me about a week to get all of "My Sweetie" done.
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ReplyDeleteThat was beautiful. Truly heartwarming. Also the best Derpy origin-story I've ever read :D
ReplyDeleteOk, I can finally begin typing down my thoughts on this story/series of events. Before I get started I need to let everypony know that I'm not a professional writer, but I'm going to at least try to stick with the whole five sentences per paragraph thing. On a serperate note, I have read this story once before, and by the time I'm posting this I would have read all eight parts for a second time. You might wanna pack a lunch, because this is gonna be a long one.
ReplyDeletePart 1: The first thing I'm going to talk about here is the group of bullies that always push Sparkler around. First of all, anyone/pony that has to travel around with a group others and bully another individual just for the sake of doing it is a coward and deserves nothing less then death. Knowing about these bullies really makes me wish that I could find them and kick there little asses myself and make an example out of them. And I don't mean the hit them once and send them on there way ass kicking no, I mean a beat them with interest kind of ass kicking that makes them wish they were dead! On top of that, anypony around that knew something like this was going on and didn't even look in the direction it's taking place in, deserves the same thing. Also, I love how Derpy just swoops in and bulldozes over the bully that had Sparkler pinned to the ground.
Now to end my little rant fest off on a good note, I would very much like to thank Mrs. Carewell for taking such good care of Sparkler and showing her that no matter how dark and unfair life can be for some, that there is always going to be somepony that cares for her, that there will always be the slightest beam of light in all of that darkness to let her know that everything is going to be just fine. And of course I have have HAVE to thank Derpy, not only for being a hero to a little filly in need, but for doing the right thing because it was the right thing to do. Honestly, I really do wish that more people/ponies could learn from this example and become a beacon of shining light to everyone/pony who is facing dark times. And to Sparkler, I would simply say bravo to you for patiently waiting and enduring everything you've gone through. That alone shows a strength that some just don't have.
Part 2: Sparkler being as nervous as she was isn't really that much of a surprise, given that fact that she's now in uncharted territory, in fact it was very refreashing to practically see her face light up when she saw Ponyville for the first time, thus allowing all of her worries to be put to rest. Another nice little touch to the start off her new life was the fact that Depry and Dinky set up the party just for Sparkler, proving that they are ready and willing to accept her as a member of there family. All of the emotions that were going around from Sparkler being a happy sad, to Dinky's hyper excitment are almost a little confusing because I wasn't sure which emotion to feel myself, which is why Derpy's relaxed understanding and calm demeanor of the situation allowed me to really see what was going on which made me choose to look at the situation from her point of veiw. And I've got to say that I love how Derpy speaks! To me there's nothing wrong with her!
ReplyDeleteThe next morning for Sparkler must have been somewhat of a shake up, just in a good way. Given the fact that she was so used to waking up at the orphanage and having to follow that same old routine every morning, getting used to a new routine must still come as a shock to her, on top of what Dinky revealed to her which in my opinion was no more then the truth. To me Derpy was more causious then ambitious about adopting Sparkler and didn't want to take the chance of getting her hopes up. All of that tension seemed to die down a great deal after breakfast as all three Derpy, Dinky, and Sparkler carried on with the rest of the day, only to have it come back as Sparkler started to let her own mind wander. If she had known then just how special the name sweetie really is, then she would have no reason to ever doubt Derpy's love for her.
Part 3: It's almost impossible to actually hide something from your parents, unless you're really good at it. In Sparkler's case she made it to obvious and Derpy picked up on it before Sparkler had a chance to try and cover it up at all. Of course any good parent would try to get to the root of such a problem and let it be the end of it, but a great parent (Derpy) would persoanlly get involved in order to eliminate the problem once and for all. The day at the market seemed to be the perfect thing to boast Sparkler's confidence until Applejack's uncharacteristic outburst. Of course with Sparkler's past traumas it's no surprise that she reacted the way she did.
ReplyDeleteBut just like the turning of a page, her mood switched and she cheered right back up the second she entered the toy store. By the way, I love how Dinky can get almost anything she wants just by being so cute. As this part wraps up, Sparkler is once again thinking to much about something that she's clearly overexaggerating. I mean I understand how she can come to the conclusions that she's coming to, but to me it seems like she's wanting everything to be all about her, which wouldn't be fair to Dinky. I guess it could be said that she's still not used to any sort of kindness from anypony and that she might be jealous of the attention that Dinky is getting, but I don't think that's fair to assume given that Derpy, in my opinion isn't treating Sparkler any different from the way she's treating Dinky.
Part 4: We start off with Sparkler still down in the dumps about what happened only a short time ago, that is until Applejack comes over and apologizes for the misunderstanding earlier that day. Applejack also seems to offer a moment of clarity to Sparkler, as well as a truth that Sparkler was previously unaware of. While eatting, or trying to eat with Derpy and Dinky all of the emotional stress that has built up since being brought to her new home started to take a physical tole on her. Of course anyone/pony that knows anything about stress will know that once it reaches a certain level, it will basically mess with your mind in the worst possible way, to which the only thing that is left to do is vent all of your frustrations. Now, having delt with my own personal experiences, I can understand why Sparkler is having her break down, but what I understand that she doesn't is that most of the time things can never be seen very clearly and a simple misunderstanding can explode into something that it was never meant to be when mixed with ignorance.
ReplyDeleteYou know how most people say "it's a new day" with an optimistic tone? Well, that doesn't seem to be the case here. I'll say with every bit of truth that the first time I read this I almost couldn't finish it. I wasn't sure exactly what to feel about this situation, whether it be anger or sadness about Sparkler's inevitable loss of all control. And I have to admit that the amount of rage that Sparkler is showing is rather frightening. Also, it really did break my heart when Sparkler smashed the shell necklace that she bought at the market the day before. In fact, I'm fighting tears this very moment reading this again.
Part 5: With the aftermath and feelings of regret still lingering deep within Sparkler's mind, we find her once again in deep thought, just this time over the possible consequences she might face as a result of her actions. But to her surprise, there were no consequences, just a plate of pancakes with cold cocoa and muffins, as well as a couple of extra surprises for her. Now everything begins to unfold.
ReplyDeletePart 6: This letter is the single most, incredible, awe inspiring thing I've ever read. It also makes me feel beyond the realm of rage knowing that a worthless mare like Derpy's mother could have treated her the way she did. I actually hope she's still alive somewhere and suffering the most horrible fate imaginable knowing that her daughter is somepony greater then she could ever dream of becoming.
ReplyDeletePart 7: As the letter continues I still find myself awestruck by how couragous Derpy is for being able to move on with her life, and yet I find myself getting more and more pissed off that this Fire Strike runs away like a coward after he got her pregnent. I really hope he's dead somewhere in a ditch after failing to make anything of himself. Finally as this letter comes to an end, everything is put to rest. Sparkler finally comes to see that she truly is loved by Derpy and not just some tool to be used. But even if she's patched everything up with Derpy, she still has to worry about Dinky.
ReplyDeleteI honestly can't be surprised at all with Dinky's outburst towards Sparkler, though it was nowhere near as intense, it was justified given that Dinky was very worried and scared for herself and her mother. But, like with most kids her feelings changed very quickly once she saw that everything really was ok. With everything all patched up and all minunderstandings put to rest it now finally seems that Sparkler is at peace not only with herself, but her family. Good night Derpy, Dinky, Spakler, and Ms. Sweetie.
Part 8: Yay sammich! It seems that this time we have a very lighthearted part, instead of one filled with negative emotions. Wow, there weren't as many thoughts on this part as I thought there were gonna be. I guess if I had to finish this part by saying anything, it would be that I'm very glad that everypony is finally happy and Sparkler's dream finally came true.
ReplyDelete@N.1.S. Go to my deviantart: Bigmackintosh.deviantart.com to get some closure on the sea shell necklace :)
ReplyDelete@N.1.S Ehm... I'm a little confused to see how beating the bullies in part 1 to near death, will set a good example for anything. In fact, I think it would make it all a lot worse.
ReplyDeleteDon't get me wrong. The bullies do need some sort of "punishment" for what they did, but brutal violence? Doesn't that make you worse than them?
Regardless, how kind of you to give us your thoughts. ;)
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ReplyDelete@Big Mackintosh I will do that here shortly after I finish a few things. Now all I would like to know is, 1, what is you opinion on my basically full story "review"? As far as I know I'm the only one to have done this for all 8 parts. And 2, how many more parts will be in "Magic Isn't My Thing"? I plan on doing the same thing for that portion of the story as well.
ReplyDelete@MassEffective The reason I went that far with it, is kinda personal. Many years ago when I was a child I had bullies myself, but that's not important. I got way more upset then I probably should have reading this because (as crazy as I might sound) I care deeply for Sparkler (Derpy and Dinky as well), plus it pains me on so many levels just to see how weak and cowardice bullies really are. That's why my thoughts went in that direction.
ReplyDelete@N.1.S. let me start by saying lets not get judgemental with each other :S I know what its like to be bullied, more so on Sparkler's level (although i did get my revenge in a way so it bittersweet). back on topic there will be at least two more parts to story 2. I will write them as soon as i feel ready but right now even with drawing my head is a mess: in short im epileptic and due to back order have been without any form of meds for 5 days and only just got them today so im taking it slow, but it will come in due time i'll be starting next week at the latest on part 3
ReplyDelete@Big Mackintosh I just went to your deviantart page and saw what happened to the shell necklace. That was beautiful.
ReplyDelete@Big Mackintosh
ReplyDeleteEver since I started reading your stories, my favorite pony has become a 3-way tie between sparkler, derpy, and dinky; with sparkler coming out in front. I happened to stumble onto this story while reading another story, but I'm glad that you're making something that I can enjoy! Please try to her the next part to the 2nd story out soon!
I really like this story plz continue it
ReplyDelete@DiamondTiara I am continuing it, dont worry about that :) ive just had a problem with writer's block recently and it i really annoying because the next part is over the halfway point finished :(
ReplyDeleteWhen will the next update be?
ReplyDelete@N.1.S. It's currently being proof read, I should have it edited quickly and have it up today or tomorrow at the latest ^^
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed this new chapter very much
ReplyDeleteDerpy at school? I can't see any problems showing up from that. Excellent chapter as always good sir!
ReplyDelete@Big Mackintosh
ReplyDeleteWhen will the final part of "Magic Isn't My Thing" come out? When it does I can re-read "Magic Isn't My Thing" and write down my toughts the same way I did for "My Sweetie".
A agree completely with GaruuSpike. Sums it up perfectly.
ReplyDeleteDerpy turned back into a filly. Best freakin' premise ever. Can't wait for chapter 4. :D
ReplyDeleteI saw the new update and suddenly I was like 'WOO HOO!'
ReplyDeleteso beautiful so friendly so wonderful and it make me feel like i'm living in a farm with warm feelings of being in my home it also almost made me wanna cry
ReplyDeleteStill loving it! Can't wait for the next chapter, to see what schoolfilly shenanigans she gets up to! Will she run afoal of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon? With her disabilities, it's almost guaranteed they'll try to pick on her. But how will she retaliate?
ReplyDeleteAnd is this taking place in The Cutie Pox? It would explain the filly Derpy hanging around the school house.
@Kroqgar why yes it i taking place during cutie pox :D I had made the decision earlier to write some side stories to my sweetie' in order to explain some happenings in the show. in this case the filly derpy!
ReplyDeletegotta read these books up!
ReplyDeleteawesome story you have to do the rest
ReplyDeleteawesome you have to do rest
ReplyDeleteAny idea when the next update will be?
ReplyDelete@N.1.S.
ReplyDeleteIt'll be ready in a week or so. Progress has been slow because my OC tumblr (originally intended to be a second fic) has come into a major storyline plot and I've been doing non stop drawing as a result.
You can find it here: http://ask-mack-ponyville-blacksmith.tumblr.com/
I love this. They have put this in a special episode of MLP :)
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone out there know what ever happened to Big Mackintosh? 2 months ago today he said that part 4 of "Magic Isn't My Thing" would be out and nothing has happened.
ReplyDelete@N.1.S. There are a few things that have prevented me from updating the story, the first being that for at lest a month and a half I have been very ill and still have no idea what it is wrong. It's has driven me to use the highest stabiliser in Paint tool SAI when drawing because my hand is so unsteady I can't use it any lower.
ReplyDeleteSecondly the laptop I use to write 'My sweetie' blue screen crashed on me 2 days ago. This means my progress on part 4 has been lost. I am now going to have to use Notepad to write it all out again and to continue the story.
@Big Mackintosh
ReplyDeleteCrap am I ever out of the loop. I just now caught up on your askderpyanddaughtersboth tumblr. That sucks man, I hope you get to feeling better soon. I mean I knew you were in the hospital but I didn't know how bad it was.
Is this really completed? D=
ReplyDelete@ohmybuddha no it isn't finished and I'm not sure when I will. I recently found out that I've had a stroke and it's really badly effected my abilities to write and draw. I will recover to an extent over time but I'm not gonna continue this fanfic until I feel comfortable with my ability to do so.
ReplyDeleteIt's not dead and I won't leave it unfinished, it's just gonna be a while.
@Big mackintoshHoly shit...Forget about the story being dead, I'm just glad YOU'RE not dead!
ReplyDeleteOh I was wondering why this had not updated.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI am wondering if you have this story on fimfiction.net?
ReplyDelete@ohmybuddha I'm afraid I don't and I'd like to keep the story here on EQD alone. I already have had someone put it up on Deviantart without permission. It's easier to keep track of here and the proofreaders are really helpful when I need advice so I'm going to just keep the fic here ^^
ReplyDeleteI have read My Steetie at least a good 6 times. it still makes me tear up.
ReplyDeleteStill waiting for the rest... I hope you don't drop this D:
ReplyDelete@Brennan Johnston Don't worry I have no intentions of dropping the fanfic ^^ I've just been busy with other projects lately and my recovery too. I did manage to get Microsoft office on my new laptop so I no longer have to rely on my slow old one. Should help when I come back to writing this story!
ReplyDeleteI guess it was dropped
ReplyDelete@Jonathan Litwinka
ReplyDeleteIt's not dropped and I know I keep saying I'll do it in x amount of time but the fact is I've just lost my vibe for this story. But this happens alot with me and it is why I have multiple blogs and hobbies. I jump from one to the next and eventually come back. I always do. Someday I will get back to this and rewrite the story where necessary, it wont be an unfinished project.
@Big mackintosh
ReplyDeleteIt would be sad if the story were to be rewritten at all. I love this story the way it is and very much wish to see it continue when you get around to it. Please don't change a thing.
@N.1.S.
ReplyDeleteOh no, I should really have elaborated more on my point ^^;; What I mean is I'll rewrite the part 4 of story 2 I have completed. I'm not happy with it as when I read it it feels like it was forced out to meet demands and doesn't flow well at all. So instead of putting out a sort of decent update to the story I'll start by rewriting the part I have finished but unloaded.
@Big mackintosh
ReplyDeleteP.S. Please tell Derpy, Dinky, and Sparkler that I love them all. :)
@N.1.S.
ReplyDeleteTell them yourself on their blog ^^ it was on hiatus for a bit while I made prints for an upcoming convention and took a trip to England but now I've been updating my blogs again, Derpy blog is next!
http://ask-derpy-and-daughters-both.tumblr.com/