Author: NTSTS
Description: Pinkie Pie throws a 'we're sorry' party for Zecora at her home in the Everfree Forest, but the get-together takes an interesting turn when Pinkie's 'surprise' shows up...Everfree Entertainment
Additional Tags: Party, Surprise, Random, Rated PG-13
90 comments:
I can guess what that surprise is :3
lol a PG-13 surprise!
SECOND
D: FOURTH
LOLOLOL Wut.
First! :3
...this should be entertaining, I also liked Shades of Pink from this author, so hopefully it's good.
God knows we couldn't have a fic where everyone was straight. Oh well.
Yay!
Same author as Shades of Pink!? Must read as soon as I get home!
The surprise was fairly obvious, but it was still funny.
That was... wow. Pretty sure this is the first MLP fic I've read that involves a stripper. Um... that was good, and I'm still chuckling at the rather memorable jokes, but I really think I oughta get back to my own story. Y'know, self-imposed deadlines and whatnot.
I laughed far too hard at that picture.
Hahaha a stripper! Priceless!
PG-13... Blushing Zecora... OH. I managed to put the pieces together before reaching later into the story, but it was still a laugh. Nice job.
wat.
That was.. interesting..
This was random, this was funny, this was "Wat" inducing, this was 5/5 for sure, this was kinda creepy, but most of all, this was far from normal...
I couldn't stop laughing once the 'Royal Guard' walked in. XDD seriously, I saw it comin but that didn't make it any less hilarious. Zecora lapsing into chants from shock was a great touch too. XD awesome.
DO HO HO
All throughout, I was wondering if the picture was relevant, or just vaguely related. So I read... and even when it happened, I still had a smile and a laugh. Great suspense!
Rate with ALL the stars! *fist pump*
I read the tags and all I could think was:
"Coming this fall, Rob Schneider is... A Zebra! And he'll learn that it's a jungle out there in a town full of ponies. See Rob Schneider in Everfree Entertainment, rated PG-13."
I fell off of my chair
Twice
@Anonymous
Deuce Bigalow: Equestrian Gigolo?
"That's a HUUUUUGE Draft Horse!"
Meh
@Anonymous
Zecora>Rob Schneider
Oh god.
I want to read it, but at the same time, I know what it is...
notsureifwant.jpg
What Zecora said roughly translates to, "Oh my goodness, how embarrassing."
Pretty sure it's Swahili.
What the fuck have I just read...I highly suggest this lol
Hilarious story bro, but did anyone else think "Oh look a Blank Flank" when they first saw the picture? Though now that I look back I suppose that could BE the cutie mark, nakedness......
Brilliant. I kinda wish the image hadn't spoilered it but, still hilarious.
Haha, loved it the first time, still love it now! Great job on this one, NTSTS, looking forward to more!
Way to much build up, for not a lot out of it. Also felt very cliche. Can't wait till we get some fics about what FiM is about, you know, friendship, and love. Instead of everyone being about fucking/murder/depression
HA! That was hilarious! Loved it, really did, and the suggestion that Rainbow Dash is gay, also made me chuckle. Even though everyone knows she totally has the hots for Soarin
Rainbow's lack of reaction to a male stripper is priceless.
I felt almost dirty reading this toward them end. XD
Pretty funny! I liked it! =D
I didn't even look at the picture for the fanfic. So I didn't catch on what was going to obiviously happen.
Anyway, this was a nice story. I did chuckle at Rainbow's reaction.
What was Pinkie Pie thinking. I mean hiring a stripper for a party gets heavy.
DAT ENDING
Did someone say "jungle fever"?
So, wait...did they party all night, or did they sleep over?
Zecora's hut only has one room, and "back" suggests something happened...
That made me lol. a lot.
that is the greatest picture ever.
That was pretty awesome. Zecora's and Dash's reaction to the stripper were great.
When I put two and two together I was like OMG!!!
Then I laughed.Damn nice job.
Og Celestia above that was priceless... The only thing that irks me ever so slightly was, strangely enough, RD's lack of reaction. I personally think the whole 'RD is a lesbian' thing a little overdone, probably would've gotten a bigger laugh from me if she has the biggest reaction of the crowd.
5/5 would bow chikka wow wow again
I almost wish the story didn't come with that picture, awesome as it is. It would've made the surprise that much funnier. Still, I laughed hard when it actually happened. A fun little story!
Wow Nice Story !
It made me :
^^ then ... then 0o and then :3
@Anonymous
Your special talent being naked in a world full of naked ponies...
Um, kinda sucks brony.
heterosexual! O_O
But...how does stripping work if they're all already naked?
Near the end, I just kept thinking of twilights line from the mentally advanced series
"But im already naked!"
basically, the fanfic is a complete waste of words to describe what is self-evident in the picture....
I nearly died laughing. Highly suggestive, but I totally recommend it!
my gosh... laughing is to be had upon reading. I wasn't expecting the lol level to be so high.
Wasn't 100% on how the characters were portrayed, but still worth the lolz
Quite a bit wordier than necessary. As an example, you don't need an entire paragraph to tell us "Twilight used magic to open the invitation," unless it's about to become a plot point.
This would be better if Bits came in bills. I think the writers of the show need to address paper money.
Bow-chicka-bow-wow
The ending felt a tad bit rushed, but something about the build-up during the first two thirds just clicked for me. Pinkie Pie's innocence versus Twilight's logical panic attacks totally stole the show for me, and that's worth the price of admission in my book.
I should add that I'm desperately trying to rationalize, in a non-sexual way, Rainbow Dash's disinterest in the stripper. I've got it narrowed down to either disappointment towards the fact that the guard isn't real (see "A Bird in the Hoof"), or just general dislike towards Zecora and her weirdness. It's a long shot, but...
Obvious plot is obvious. Granted it was only a few sentences from "Random entertainment" to "Yup" but still....
Although it was obvious...I still got a laugh.
I think someone heard me exclaim WHAT THE FUU...? out loud.
I was grinning ear-to-ear!
I died laughing so many times reading this. 55555555555555555555
I didn't expect it.
I thought that the guard stepped through poison joke and it caused his cutie mark to disappear, causing Zecora to laugh.
I also thought that the image was completely unrelated.
Also, Rainbow Dash's lesbian reaction made me chuckle.
Two questions that linger for me:
1) Was the stallion a stripper or a hooker?
2) If hooker, did he bone everyone (maybe minus Rainbow Dash) or just Zecora?
Though then again I think thats supposed to be for us to decide.
Stripper or Hooker? I want to say... hooker? and I want to say everyone.
In my headcanon, the ponies who do this are actual Royal Guards, not just impersonators.
>mfw only dash seemed uninterested
http://i.imgur.com/iS1Tw.png
@nemryn That would be the best initiation rite ever
I love the picture and I have to read this!
First real laugh: "There's an exception to every rule!" Oh, Pinkie.
Oh geez. "Some kind of entertainment". OH MY
Oh god yes. XD "So I hear you've been a bad girl." I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING
OH-HO DAT ENDING. If I have any complaints about this story, it's that there was only one guy! That was hilarious.
Loved it. Thank you for posting it.
@Rubidia
I was gonna write a comment, and then I realized that yours was better.
In other words: "This".
@Anonymous
Well, one weird idea this gave me was that maybe Rainbow's not into that kind of guy. Maybe Rainbow Dash, for all her brashness, like older men? Like some kind of Pony Christopher Lee?
@Anonymous Maybe Dash is disgusted or offended at the crass exploitation of Equestria's brave military stallions?
Zecora is a playa
The look on my face right now must be priceless. That was absolutely fantastic. Oh Celestia, that was awesome... excellent work!
It's sad that I don't have a song that goes with this well.
Cute story and the drawing of the "guard" making smoochy lips at Zecora makes it even better!
oh shit i grinned so bad and facepalmed so hard hard this was fucking funny
@nemryn
Especially when she's not the one crassly exploiting them!
Anyone else think of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gDkLSjsiqlM ?
lol
I wish the pic didn't spoil it but it still got me to lulz
Also surprised to finally see a straight story -_-
minus the Dash reaction lol..poor Dash...forever pegged into her fanon orientation XD
Oh sweet Celestia ponies can be strip dancers for parties now... And that ending raises some questions I don't know if I want answered. :/
My coworkers probably think I'm going crazy. I read this before my shift started and now I keep spontaneously giggling maniacally.
I mean, come on, in a world where most ponies don't wear a stitch of clothing anyways, a male stripper still seems erotic? That's just plain hilarious.
Hey everyone, thanks again for all the kind words (mostly), as well as voicing your problems with the story. I wasn't one hundred percent happy with it when I finished it, but upon the recommendation of some readers I decided it maybe deserved a submission; glad to see I wasn't wrong.
Yes, it is a bother that the picture spoils the surprise of the story, but it was such an amazing piece of art I couldn't leave it out after requesting it.
To people complaining about Dash's dislike of the guard - it was a simple throwaway section, nothing more; don't read too much in to it! (even though my motivation for writing it as such is fairly obvious)
And, finally, to everyone who had direct/indirect problems with the story; feel free to contact me through email or here in the comments and I'll be happy to address your concerns and complaints. I love discussing writing with people, so any feedback is welcome.
The ding ding dong song is now in my head for some reason. :| Even though I knew what the surprise was, it was still fucking hilarious.
I was lining to party boy theme to this, made it alout more fun to read.
Heheheh. This fic was fantastically fun, and the end drew a guffaw from me. Very well done!
I was kind of hoping Rainbow Dash was going to try and give him pointers, as if she was a master stripper herself. Oh well.
An uproarious great story you have made!
At every moment, giggles and laughs my voice has laid!
A way with words, you most certainly do possess.
Eager for more, I myself do personally assess. :)
Epic in every way, random, and hilarious XD
I thought this thing was hilarious. I like how you wrote Pinkie in this story, and you did just as good of a job writing Twilight.
I even got a good chuckle out of Dash's reaction to what was going on.
O_O
Dat ending. Hilarity endured.
It didn't make the third half of the story any less... saucy... that I was listening to "Princess Luna" from Silvahound's "Drinks on Da House" album.
Post a Comment