Sunday, February 19, 2012

Story: Sticks and Stones




[Random] [Shipping] [Comedy] Even rocks and trees need love sometimes.

Author: Nine
Description: Every culture has its own story of romance blossoming under the most unlikely of circumstances. The wild west is no exception. In a little town called Appleloosa, the one of the strangest love stories of all time is about to unfold. That is, unless Braeburn has anything to say about it...
Sticks and Stones

Additional Tags: More implausible ships have happened

73 comments:

MyBoyJ said...

Sounds interesting.

Travis Smith said...

*uncontrolled laughter*

Haze said...

If this survived the pre-readers it must be pure gold.

Travis Smith said...

Well crazier ships have happend
Good thing I don't read them

Trigonometrize said...

*Sees Image* Pretty ambiguous, looks interesting.
*Reads "Even rocks and trees need love sometimes* ...

What?

TechnoTrot said...

Cargo shipping?

>ohboyherewegord.jpg

Namatophobic said...

So someone finally decided to ship Tom and Fluttershy. In this fandom, that was inevitable.

MLPGmtom said...

What is this... i don't even

Bronyhub said...

So someone finally decided to ship Bloomberg and Tom? Well as the additional tags point out, stranger ships have indeed happened. Well it did get past the pre-readers, I think I'll give it a go, it sounds like fun!

TechnoTrot said...

"'Sheriff, they've eloped.'

AND SO THE LEGEND BEGINS."

BHAHAHAHAH 5/5 ALL MY BITS

Namatophobic said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
FredFredNineNine said...

My first reaction: Wut
My second reaction: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Sgt Byrd said...

Gonna guess tomxbloomberg, and yes, stranger ships have probably sailed. You'd be surprised what is seaworthy in this fandom.

D. Shadows said...

Moving rocks do exist actually, I know because they live in the desert based areas.

Unfortunately I think Bloomberg is an 'it' and so is Tom. So basically any gender you give them is subjective by point of view.

Thus the relationship is probably more emotional and spiritual in nature then anything.

GummyWolfz said...

Such a beautiful and timeless love story

thedudewithnoface said...

@Sgt Byrd

What ship could be stranger than this?

Tast said...

STILL a better love story than Twilight. (The vampires, of course)

D. Shadows said...

@thedudwithnoface

Rainbow, with an inanimate book.

ombutescentdin said...

That rocks, but I think I will leaf this one alone.

Kether said...

Tomberg is best shipping?

Nine said...

@D. Shadows
Actually, I'm pretty sure Twilight's been shipped with books before. Not an experience I'd like to repeat.

MyBoyJ said...

Just finished reading. A funny and well written story. Strangely emotionally touching towards the end.

Bucky The Nonfictional Pony said...

You dont know how long ive been waiting for this ship
*squee*

D. Shadows said...

@Nine

At least the book had a live spirit in it! Unless you didn't read that one... Teen Titans kind of a parody that was, at least it was benign.

This fandom is quite insane and I'm a proud to see it continuing along those lines.

pmcollectorboy said...

It's finally happened. Welp. Time to finish my Tomity story.

Shingo said...

The minister who performed Tom and Bloomberg's ceremony must have either been drunk of his/her ass, high as the Hayabusa satellite, or hallucinating to be willing to go through with it. That was a fun read.

He11ix said...

Dangit! I kept meaning to write something like this, but now I've missed my chance. Curse my habits of procrastination, you have foiled me yet again!

Travis Smith said...

@D.Shadows
Our definitions of Insanity are very different

iloveMLP said...

wait a rock and a tree
wtf?!!!!!!!!

D. Shadows said...

@Travis Smith

But, I know fifteen kinds of insane... and thirty seven ways to define a being as such.

Rocky said...

I'm a rock, and this story moved me.

Upyoursize said...

No bucking way. The crap that gets posted on here sometimes...

Asdos01 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ryunosuke said...

before reading this...

Trees and rocks and rocks and trees and...
Waaaateeeerrrrrrr

no_space said...

I have said it before, and I'll say it again.

Inanimate love is best love.

CWrebel23 said...

Ya know, this is probably my new favorite ship.

Arcainum said...

Oh my God, OH MY GOD, someone ACTUALLY wrote a Tomberg fic. You, sir or lady, are my hero.

Aesoporific said...

Their offspring would clearly be:
http://img.pokemondb.net/artwork/sudowoodo.jpg

Arcainum said...

Oh man, take my 5-star. Just...JUST TAKE IT.

That was amazing. Not only did you actually make me honest-to-god go "aww" at a friggin' tree and a rock (THE ROOTS, MAN ;_;), that ending made me literally roll of my sofa with laughter.

Beautiful.

Firemane said...

@Dͪ͊ͦḮ̘ͯS̔̐̓C̹̔Ò͓͙̫R̀͠͞D͙̫

come now, as the spirit of chaos this aught to be right down your drain pipe! i mean face it. when you drink you drink the glass and toss the milk over your shoulder to cause explosions..

a rock and a tree being shipped is just par for the course!

Persona said...

Heck yes. How the author came up with this ship I'll never know, but this is pure gold right here.

Sgt Byrd said...

@thedudewithnoface

Others beat me to it replying.

tomxbloomberg is inanimate object with inanimate object, two things of a similar type being shipped, which makes more sense than pony with inanimate object, like twixbook or rarityxtom. It's half believable that inanimate objects are sentient and nopony knows.

Didn't we once have twixlamp as well, that was probably an Anchorman reference.

Arcainum said...

@Persona

I know it gets thrown out a lot (especially by me) as an example when people start 'LOL SHIP ALL THE THINGS' threads in reddit, but I never thought I'd ACTUALLY see it.

Whitespace Only said...

It's official: if you hate shipfics and are forced to read something with the shipping tag... read this one. If you're just looking for something to entertain you, read this too. That was ridiculous, hilarious and brilliant.

Croswynd said...

This got quite a few chuckles out of me. I can honestly say I enjoyed it. It felt comedic and realistic enough in Equestria for it all to make a weird kind of sense. Thank you for writing this short. There are few enough things in this world written that are fun to read.

a47a3bba-2051-11e1-af6b-000f20980440 said...

This is actually a very amusing, and at parts, touching story, if you can look past the bizarre nature of the shipping. It also kind of makes sense that two inanimate objects might be able to achieve sentience in Equestria, especially given the circumstances of this particular pair.

Bloomberg was cared for, adored, and truly, maternally loved by Applejack. If friendship has the power to banish Nightmare Moon and imprison Discord, surely love, combined with earth pony magic, would be enough to give a plant (already a living thing!) a spark of sentience?

Tom, on the other hand, was trapped in the Royal Gardens for who knows how long. Being in a city filled with unicorn magic, near the home of Princess Celestia, probably meant Tom had more ambient arcane energy infused into him than your average boulder. When Discord broke out and exposed Tom to his chaos magic, it was enough of a boost to push Tom into sentience.

After being abandoned by Rarity, Tom would certainly have been lonely, so he would have traveled the world, looking for a kindred spirit...and the rest is what happened in this story!

Mudora said...

And that's how Rocky was made?

Complex Theory said...

Congrats, you broke the mind. Discord is confused, you have achieved legendary tier.

I eagerly await a sequel in which Braeburn confront the two and then he awakens the next day to see a note where bloomburg was once rooted, explaining that they left town since he didn't give permission for their marriage. Braeburn only giving chase. in the meantime, Applejack and Rarity are in awe as they arrive in Appleloosa after seeing a 'mirage' of a tree and rock during the train ride.

Please do something Nine, I have faith in your writing abilities.

SightlessOne said...

I think my mind just imploded upon reading this. It's not that its bad (far from it), it's... well... strange.

Present Perfect said...

>[Shipping] tag
>4.6 stars
>oh, fandumb :|

RainbowDash818 said...

I lol'ed SO HARD at the ending. Pure genius, Nine, pure genius.

Jason Shadow said...

I think the most mind-screwy thing about this story is how it wasn't really all that mind-screwy in the first place.

Radoxeald said...

KINDA inevitable ship. Must read.

Clockwise said...

I still wanna read the Stick and Stones Cop story. I wonder why I can't find it here. :(

814ckd347h said...

Bloomberg/Tom shipping that got past pre-readers?!?!?!

WHATISTHISIDONTEVEN-

Likonan said...

I have never felt so much admiration for love between a ROCK and a TREE. XD

I quite like this story! :D

Sgt Byrd said...

Just finished reading this, pretty good. I liked the way it didn't rely on dialogue between Tom and Bloomberg, I also liked the length.

I'd like to see a comedy adventure with Tom and BBerg.

Sgt Byrd said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Alondro said...

@Likonan *gasp!* A male tree and a male rock?! BLASPHEMY!!! Botanality AND minerality COMBINED!! Such a perversion of nature cannot be allowed to stand! I call for burning at the stake!

*trolololo* ;D

Praetorian_Pony said...

This was awesome and hilarious. Whoever wrote this THANK YOU!!! You are wonderful and I hope you keep writing.

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