• Story: Spitfire's Day Off

    [Normal] [Slice of Life]

    Author: Artimae
    Description: Being the captain of Equestria's most renowned aerobatics team is a stressful, and sometimes thankless, job. Her joints ache; her muscles are taut; her mind reels from the sheer responsibility. But, like any professional, Spitfire takes it all in stride with a grin. That is, until a certain rainbow-maned mare started mouthing off. Being accused of 'Camera Hogging' was the final straw. Spitfire finally lost her temper, dumping every ounce of that responsibility on an unwitting rookie and leaving for a single day of respite. This story details her day of (mostly) relaxation.

    Spitfire's Day Off

    Additional Tags: Spitfire goes to the Spa

    17 comments:

    1. i'm sorry but from that i say no.....RD would never do that to any pony

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    2. YES WE HAVE SPITFIRE. THANK YOU, CELESTIA.

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    3. Isn't Soarin the captain of the Wonderbolts?

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    4. @TaerilynCobb

      Nope.

      Nopony really is, but it's generally taken to be Spitfire :)

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    5. I'm sorry but I highly doubt Rainbow Dash would do that.
      I read this on FIMfiction and honestly, it sucked.
      Its a shortened Spitfire origin story guys.

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    6. gonna have to wait a while to read this, FIMfiction is returning a 502 error to me :/

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    7. Worth mentioning that this is a side story to the author's other fic, so a couple thing's might be clearer if you read that first.

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    8. I can easily conceive Dash to have done this. Firstly, there was a lot of tension buildup prior to the handing over of authority. But "Blitz" was the main story from which this branches. I enjoyed it from what I reviewed for Arty. It's far from terrible. Excellent work, dude. Good job getting on EqD. I'll be next! (crosses fingers)

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    9. @Marvin Martian

      I greatly appreciate your comment, and value your opinion. I must ask, though - how is this an origin story?

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    10. It certainly wasn't bad, and it made me want to actually try out a spa myself, but it felt kind of...driftless. On top of that, some points just seemed thrown in to get a reaction out of the reader rather than just being organic flow of the story (colt cuddler, the prevented 'happy ending', the emotional whiplash of happy Spitfire/crying Spitfire at her grandfather's grave).

      As a standalone, it's...okay, but not amazing.

      Mechanically, it was sound, much better than most I've read recently, but it could use a bit of direction if it's going to stand on its own merits rather than relying on a core story to give it dimension.

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    11. @Drakmire

      The first two, yeah, were kind of 'thrown in there' just to see if they'd give the reader a giggle. As was the itchy nose in the mud bath scene because I'm a huge whore =3.

      As for the grave scene, I honestly should've conveyed it better, but she just continuously loses her composure until she utterly breaks down. The significance is implied, but for clarification: she has to be the strong one in public. So in her one little slice of heaven she can be completely open and herself.

      I never dreamed it would be so popular. It was meant to just be a side-story. A fun little "In-Between" read while I focus on my main fic.

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    12. I came for the cute picture of Spitfire, stayed for the story. It was good, and I definately enjoyed the giggles I got out of it. Definately was more memorable with them than without. But yeah, the weird-as-hay happy//sad//happy sorta threw me off.

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