• Story: The Shattered Journey (Updated Part 2)

    [Normal] A Dash story without shipping? I'm actually relieved!

    Author: Sword of Squirrels
    Description: Rainbow Dash receives a royal message. As the fastest flyer in Equestria, only she can deliver a peace offering to the mighty King of Griffons to the far north within the four day time limit. However, the journey turns out to be more complicated than she originally thought, and Rainbow Dash must ask for help both from her friends, and from other, unexpected sources.
    The Shattered Journey
    The Shattered Journey Part 2 (New!)

    Additional Tags:  Journey, Adventure

    17 comments:

    1. omigosh, I just had the best idea! Has Dash been shipped with a griffon king before?! heh.

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    2. I sense an epic journey of danger, snow, hardship and muffins. Very good so far.

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    3. You know, the standard cliche here is the official "gift" is completely worthless and that the real "gift" is Rainbow Dash herself. The storm hazards around the griffin lands are actually some kind of test of character or ability and Equestria having a Pony capable of navigating them in the set time will impress the Griffins.

      Of course, that's the cliche. It remains to be seen if this is what the author is doing.

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    4. Looks good so far. And that bit about Pinkie bouncing with Dash? I could totally see that happening in the show.

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    5. Well war with the griffons isn't that bad.
      No seriously!
      Declare war on US? Enjoy eternal night suckers! And if that doesn't works, well the planet could always need a new desert.

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    6. Aside from a few minor typos, this is a great fic. I love this idea. I look forward to more of this.

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    7. I am positive on this one. Its refreshing to read a fic that is plain NOMRAL, withour shipping, grimdark, random, crossover or something plain silly, just like an episode! Also, writing is good, characters flesh out nicely, good, lovely intro and a nice beginning for some action-adventure for our sweet ponies ;) Likeeeee it.

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    8. Author gets an Instant *Mana Cookie* for the adorable mention of Derpy's daughter, Dinky. :)

      Idea seems good, yeah. Diplomatic mission on a shade of Adventure, and Derpy is in it ;)

      Too bad there isn't more stories involving the proud and militaristic nation of the Griffins.

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    9. I'm just grateful to find a fic that has Derpy speaking normally. The poor girl just has funny eyes, she's not a moron!

      Oh, and good fic so far. Not a lot to go on yet, but I'm looking forward to seeing the Griffon nation.

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    10. Cant w8 for the next part of a potentially EPIC FRIENDSHIP ADVENTURE!!!

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    11. Minor annoyance: Terra shouts to much in the second chapter. I'm sure she can say some things instead of shouting them.

      Other then that, fun read.

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    12. An epic story to be sure. Can't say I've read to many stories with Derpy as an active part of the adventure.
      I liked Mane Town and it's interesting inhabitants, Terra's adventure in Ponyville would make a good side story. That or the CMC's excapades at Rarity's.
      Looking forward to what comes next.

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    13. This is a really good story, I'm hooked.

      My one nitpick is that in Chapter Two you named Moon Shower as Moon Flower. You have to decide which is which.

      Still, I'm looking forward to reading more from you. Don't fizz out!

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    14. Well written, I'm enjoying the story immensely.

      On a side note, specific warnings to Applejack to stay away from fire, this screams of foreshadowing. All in all, an epic tale.
      Can't wait until Part 3.

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    15. I can't wait to see how the griffons and the weather welcome the flying crew.

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    16. Okay I'm sorry for the following in advance, but it is a pet peeve.

      IT IS LOSE, NOT LOOSE! LOSE IS FAILING, NOT WINNING, LOOSE IS NOT TIGHTFGAJGKALGHALG DAKJHDLFADNF;KDASHGA'
      GAGFSGSG
      SBFSD
      GFSDHG
      FSDG

      Oh also the whole travelers gently fluttered gently to the ground thing in the second chapter.

      Anyways, it's a great story and I look forward to chapter 3. I agree that it's fun to see Derpy talking normally for once.

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