It was a good fan fic but the thing that kinda ruined it for me was the fact that Rarity and Spike had sex. I thought that it was unnecessary and distracting. But all in all it had a good pacing and I liked it.
Great story, really tugged at my heart strings cause I can identify with spike a little on this. Motivates me to never give and keep trying to make that special someone see the light.
Also, sorry if you didn't like the sex, but I had basically thought out the whole story before even beginning to write it. Also the sex is rampant in a TON of other stories, sometimes even unnecessary. I thought that after years of being Rarity's only company due to the friends splitting up, she would finally show a little... appreciation?
As you can see I also wanted to wrap up A LOT of stories. Gilda and Trixie are both in this fic, with basically a "happy ending" given to both of them. While this is partly to satisfy my own desires, I see the world of Equestria as a perfect Utopia, where eventually everyone comes to find their "happy ending", even if it must be through some trial and error!
The sex was all well and good if don't actually think of it in terms of pictures or even possibility. It mainly worked as a good romance element in my opinion. It added to the passion don't be sorry for it.
Yeah, exactly. At first I was thinking "WHELP GOTTA HAVE A 20 LINE SEX SCENE IN THERE SOMEWHERE!" But then I realized that this wasn't a fapfic, and immediatley slapped myself. Thus you will find that the sex scene is like.... 1 line long and doesn't even go into intimate details.
The fic is a long one, but I like it as a contrast to all the short fics that are thrown around. Don't get me wrong I LOVE a good, quick read. It's just, sometimes you wanna sit back with a nice (insert your favorite drink here) and read a long entertaining story of My Little Pony.... right guys?
In my humble opinion, this is the best story I've read yet for FiM. The momentum building up to Spike and Rarity's first kiss is what stands out in my mind for this. A wonderful read altogether.
This is my first writing I ever did. I was frustrated about how there were no Spike/Rarity fics despite it being in the cartoon (albeit used mostly as a joke... but then again EVERYTHING is a joke in the cartoon). I don't mind the other ships, but seeing Rainbow Dash x Pinkie for the 5th time irked me.
For a first writing I gatta say it was pretty damn good. I think spike/rarity was a damn good choice. Its a perfect source to write a story of unrequited love which later blossoms into true romance. I feel spike/rarity can let you make any kind of story you want in how they get from A to B.
I hope a drawfriend likes this story enough to make a pic or two for it. I know we have the grown spike looking at the picture and shedding a tear but I'd like to see something like spike and rarity side by side or him looking into her eyes when he tells her he will always love her.
I think that's one of the primary reasons it turned out decent. It's not a hard thing to write for (most of the ships aren't hard to write for actually), which is why I was surprised no one ever did it!
Sorry for all the posting I'm doing Blog Brony. I'm afraid you might think I'm trying to spam my own story with comments to get it read, but I just love talking with the readers about what was good/bad with it.
I just want to say what a stroke of luck this is. I'm pretty sure if I had posted this story before the blog was made or at a time when you weren't surfing the threads, it would never have seen the light of day.
The blog allows long fics like these to exist. The threads simply move too fast to keep up with so much stuff, but the blog has it in one place, unmoving. Thanks for picking this up! I probably would have been too lazy to ask you to post it, so you basically saved this story from unreadability.
Anon 1300? or was it 1700? from the Google doc chat. And I guess I already gave you my feedback there, but keep on the good work! Also, great chat we had.
Honestly, this is the best MLP fanfic that I've read... and I just read Swayback Mountain a few hours ago. Both stories are excellent and have their strong points, but I feel that A Long Time Coming is the better fanfic... only slightly.
Rarity and Spike's relationship is magical, and this story really tugged at me. I'm hoping for an episode in the series to come based solely on the two, but this will more than suffice for the time being.
You people make me cry. You make me feel so loved.
I definitely desire an episode with Spike and Rarity, but I'm not sure it will ever come. Heck, I'm not even sure if a Spike-centric episode will ever come.
Still, thanks for reading the fic. It means a lot to me, and I am glad you love the fic.
Sorry I havn't been able to produce any new content as of late. I currently just mowed through 2 exams today, and have 2 more exams tomorrow that I am studying for now. When this weekend begins, HOPEFULLY expect a short story from me before Sunday ends.
No need to apologize. I'm sure a lot of us are busy... I certainly am.
Anyone could go and ask Lauren Faust about upcoming episodes, I guess - but I really don't want to pester her. Better for her to spend her time on the series rather than responding to Deviantart comments...
I literally could not stop smiling the entire time I read the epilogue. I even heard 'Wedding March' play in my head when Rarity came out. Awesome work, sir. Awesome work.
...This is the only good shipping story. The. Only. Good. One. Go write Romance stories, dude. Romance Magazines always need better stories, and you seem like the type of person who could deliver these better stories.
Extremely well written, and much effort put forth into it... but it made me too sad to like it. Might sound lame, but this whole pony thing has made me generally happier than I've been in quite a while.
Then, in the first part, everyone getting seperated... just tore me apart. Im loving the whole fandom, then it's "shoved" in my face that it's going to end someday. That and I too have a small group of close friends that... are seeming to end up this way. Maybe not tomorrow, but you get the point.
Anywho, cheers on causing me to reflect about life!
Purely wonderful. I was reading so long I was up past when I really ought to have gotten to bed, and then stayed up longer to read the epilogue. Beautiful, absolutely loved it. I shed tears more than once.
This is one of the best fanfics I've ever read! Aw, and I just LOVE SpikexRarity it's so sweet... I feel that I must thank you for this wonderful story so...
THANK YOU COTTONMOUTH.
Oh, a Spike and Rarity episode, or even a Spike centric one, would be great. One can always dream...
This was brilliant, simple as that. I've just spent my lunch reading both of these stories, I have tears in my eyes and a warm fuzzy feeling all over.. Sadly now I must get back to my databases.. Thank you Mr Author, I think I'll re-read these tonight.
Ha! The name I usually post under is Cottonmouth but my Google Account is Lumpfish! What to choose. Oh well.
I can't push in how much these comments mean to me. I mean for gods sake the night I posted A Long Time Coming, absolutely NO one talked about it in the thread, and I thought I had wasted my time writing a fan fic that was too long for people to read.
Needless to say when I found out the blog brony had uploaded it and it had 10 comments I jumped for joy. Now it has like... 40.
Funny enough, despite it being one of the longest fics on the blog, I felt the need to extend it by another 3,000 words!
Thank all of you for reading, and keep being an awesome fandom.
Anonpony here, just needed to comment *for the first time on this site* that this is hands down the best fanfic ive read. Perfectly written, never dull, always heart warming. And Spikes one lucky guy, nuff said.
I constantly have people telling me this is the best fic on the sight yet never see it mentioned on /co/ when fanfics come into discussion.
I presume my audience is mostly blog centered, as I only post my stories in the threads one time, and that's usually at 3AM as well.
Everyone here critiquing and commenting on my work is what motivates me to write. Thank you so much for taking your time to leave your thoughts on the blog. It means a lot to me.
I always hear that this fic is one of the best on the site, but never see it brought up in the /co/ threads.
I presume that I gained mostly a separate audience from the usual trip users of the threads due to the time that this came out and simply to the fact that I only post my stories one time in the threads.
Still, don't mean to complain, because I have gained a TON of feedback from this fic. Thank you for your kind words sir, they motivate me to keep writing and help improve myself.
I just wanted to leave you a comment saying how much I enjoyed this story! I thought it was very well written, and I loved the way you wrote all the characters. Very awesome and adorable.
One of the best fics I've read on this site. I'd give you 6 stars if I could.
I really enjoy longer stories and stories in the future always capture my interest.
I didn't have a problem with the sexy part per se...it's just as Spike gets older, the logistics of it become mind boggling. Still, I thought it worked for what you wanted to do.
I thought it was great but one thought kept distracting me.
The size difference between Spike and Rarity. Dont get me wrong, i loved the story, but it was strange for me to envision a building sized Spike with a small Rarity.
Once a gain im not tryin to give of any negative criticism, i loved it
Quite the shame, I never read this earlier simply because it was RarityxSpike. I like Rarity a lot (take that however you may XD) and I thought pairing her with Spike would have been some weird idea thought up only by someone looking for a cheap lulz. I decided to give this a chance after seeing that it has 5 stars, and....... I couldn't help but root for Spike throughout the whole story.
Not only did you treat each of the characters with care and utilize them properly, but you also wrote something truly touching. I will admit that any story that has close friends becoming distant over time will always get to me. Putting together a growing up story and a regretful-decision love story just really made it twice as powerful to me.
Also, it probably helps that I have been looking into ethical controversy of relationships like these between characters and how it affects those involved as well those that get forcibly involve themselves. Not that that was heavily touched upon here, nor did it need to be. Still, what you have written here makes for a nice point of reference for something I plan to write someday.
Also, dat epilogue. It was just such a happy and peaceful ending. I tend to get jealous of characters that get to be happy. ;_;
Good job, sir, and may your future literature be just as lovingly crafted.
Wow! What a nice post! I definitely did not make this for some cheap lulz. Spike and Rarity are two of my favorite characters in the show, and seeing Spike fawn after her always makes me smile.
It's interesting. Although I started out wanting to make this fic JUST Spike and Rarity, the whole gang ended up worming their way in.
Thank you for your blessings. I will strive to work harder for readers like you.
To be honest? I wasn't as into this one as much as I expected based on the comments. Opinions are opinions, though, and it's great to see that you are getting quite a lot of positive feedback on this one. Nevertheless, I feel like voicing my own thoughts. I somehow just didn't get too absorbed into the conflicts that were there. They don't really pile up very much. When Spike stopped sending the letters, I think the sense of worry that was in Rarity could have been developed a bit better. When Twilight came barging in I was expecting something terrible to have happened to Spike and thought that the ponies would go on an adventure together to save him, and when it turned out that Spike had just returned to Ponyville it seemed like a bit of a letdown, a missed opportunity to raise the stakes a bit.
Still, the characterization is well-done and I can understand people giving it such praise. Just saying, wasn't for me.
Oh, and I didn't mind the sex. There was just the right lack of detail and lack of time spent in that situation to keep it entirely away from clopfic territory, and I think it's good that that aspect of the relationship was at least acknowledged.
It's amazing how much better my writing has become ever since this fic.
This is a shipping fic. Shit WILL get blown out of proportion. Some of the most mediocre fics on this site are praised to hell and back simply because it has some romance in it.
Perhaps you would have liked the ending I had originally planned, where Spike actually fell asleep for 100 years and awoke to find everyone but Twilight dead.
Thank you for your critique, but it's kind of 2 months too late.
Still, I'm going to give you some advice. If you thought the conflict here was not 'absorbing' enough, don't read any of the other shipping fics on this site.
Ahaha. Alright, alright. And yeah, I'm quite a bit behind on my fic-readin'. Also, I'm not well-read on shipfics at all so I suppose I didn't know what to expect.
A few parts I would have enjoyed more if they were built up a little, such as responses to the letters. But since the story itself isn't overly large, in comparison is it properly depicted. Thanks for the read.
I really liked this story. Heartwarming and a little life sadness thrown in, but everything turned out alright in the end too. Longer than most fanfics on ED and it kept me entertained during an otherwise boring day. Plus, Rarity stories are always great. (even if it was more centered on Spike)
I just wanted to come back three months later and tell you how awesome you are. Back in February when I joined the fandom this was the very first fanfic I read. It was the first time I cried in ages. I loved the story and it is still one of my favorites.
Cottonmouth, I thought that was amazing. I have always gotten SO mad that Rarity never loved spike. GREAT JOB ignore mean comments cuz this will always be one of the greatest!!
Not sure if anybody actually reads this far down in the comments, but I still want to say this for some odd reason… Couldn't Rarity have Twilight cast an enlargement spell on her like she did with the photo? So Spike and Rarity could…you know…do it… Feels wrong to say it, but it's quite logical isn't it? Not sure how Twilight would react…Luna damnit this getting wrong fast!…
Not often I'll read a story that feels so complete in it's ending. Whenever I do, I feel like a happy void that's come to an end (I swear that's not to sound as suicidal as it could be interpretted).
Job well done. I'm glad I ctrl+F'd Spike in the Story Archive tonight.
Well, reading for several minutes, I've gathered that in this particular fanfic, most of the happiness and friendship and awesome has steadily been dying. Now, mind you, I'm the kind of person who prefers bottling emotions up and then locking them in a box in the basement for fear of judgement. That being said, ponies are so freaking amazing that I shattered out of my shell a bit, and literally forced them down my friend's throat. (now he's a brony for life also, heheheh) Now, ALL THAT being said, I can't continue reading. It would completely ruin the one thing that made my summer not quite so boring/shitty, because ponies are supposed to reside in a magical floating bubble of awesome that can't be touched by the tragic realities of life. As soon as I realized this fanfic for what it was, that bubble exploded out of fucking nowhere, making me quite honestly dejected. WHY. THE PONIES. THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE TIMELESS. Y U NO SUNSHINE/MAGIC? I'm closing this...
http://www.macygray.com/node/243 http://www.salesandmarketing.com/article/talk-money 1000 facebook likes get facebook likes facebook likes I have two computers that I'm now having problems with. yesterday, my first computer shut down and said "RPC has been terminated". everytime I restart that computer, it gives me another 1:00 minute shut down warning. I know I need to change the settings of the RPC, but it shuts down before I can ever get to it. is there another way to fix this? The second computer messed up today. I was researching how to fix the other RPC problem and my computer shut down. when it rebooted, I now have "Internet security 2010" installed and I can't delete it. I had a similiar virus before and was able to manually delete the virus, but this one won't let me open task manager or the registry to delete it. it's even taken over my Internet and won't let me on. so I'm stuck trying to research problems on my iPhone. I read somewhere that if you can't get task manager to open that you need to wipe out your hard drive. I am wanting to do this but I can't find my reinstallation CD for this computer which is an emachines. however, I have the installation cd for the other computer with the RPC problem, but that computer is a Dell. can I install a Dell operating system on my emachines? they're both windows XP.
Thank you both Favo and Fordez for the nice response.
Really, while the story is pretty flawed and definitely not up to par with the fics that are on the blog these days, I respect it's age and still look back upon it with fond memories.
I'm gonna be honest, I didn't like this as much as some of the people above me seemed to have liked it. I mean, I like the general idea, and don't worry, I've read enough ship-fics that I understand that the "conflict" contained within is often of the weaker variety, and so to set my standards lower. I'll also give you that the sex was very tastefully done.
However, there were a number of spelling and grammatical errors throughout both chapters, and some of them were definitely more distracting than I'd like. Also, I think that sometimes, the dialogue could be kinda stiff, and clunky sounding, at least when I read it. However, there was something more about it that was bothering me, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out what it was.
Couldn't figure out what it was, that is, until I got to the phrase "priest pony" and then it hit me: this fic seriously reminded me of my old shitty fic (well, one of them, anyway, and if you ever happen to stumble across my account, you'll know which one) on my FF.net account (which happens to be the same name as this), except nowhere near as atrocious.
So, in the end, I give it 4/5, because I was gonna give it a 3, but then I realized that whole "reminding me of my mistakes" thing, and thought that that wouldn't be fair to you. However, I can't give it a 5, either, because of those aforementioned mistakes, plus the fact that it feels kinda rushed. I dunno. Anyway, perhaps sometime, when I have the time, I'll look up some of your newer FiMfics, and see how much you've really improved.
I quite enjoyed it. True, there were grammatical and spelling errors, but even bestselling authors need editors. All in all, the realism behind the emotions, specifically Rarity's, was such a refreshing change of pace. Typically, a shipfic will stay true to character, but not true to real life. Having Rarity struggle with her own feelings was what made this story.
That being said, I would have liked to read what happened between the first and second parts.
Am i the only one that didnt cry?! D: anyway, great story! The sex was fine, i always hate it when people whine about sex in fanfics, as long as its not clop. I loved the story, I've always wondered how a rarityxspike ship-fic would turn out, and this one is great! Keep up the good work!
A year later, this fan fiction should have more attention. Great job Cottonmouth. This was beautiful. Spike and Rarity made one of the greatest fanfics ever.
Pretty good! :3 Keep up the good work! You guys outta read "Scented Venom" by SoundofRainfall. I'd say your writing is just as good. :D Warning: There is a lot of creepiness in this fic. e.e
Pretty good! :3 Keep up the good work! You guys outta read "Scented Venom" by SoundofRainfall. I'd say your writing is just as good. :D Warning: There is a lot of creepiness in this fic. e.e
This is fantastic. I'm commenting even though I'm only halfway through, but I'm wiping the tears off my reddened cheeks and smiling, saying a silent thank you to Cottonmouth for bringing such beauty into the world.
I dont usually post. comments but this is an exception. I enjoyed everything about this story and can only hope I can ones similar to it. Congratulations writer!
113 comments:
Oh Celestia!
ReplyDeleteI cried while reading this. Repeatedly.
Hey, that was actually pretty good. I like these longer-than-average fics that are well-written; then it almost feels like you're watching an episode.
ReplyDeleteThoroughly enjoyed this one. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteAwesome story, One of my favorites on the blog.
ReplyDeleteThat was awesome! Keep up the great work!
ReplyDeleteIt was a good fan fic but the thing that kinda ruined it for me was the fact that Rarity and Spike had sex. I thought that it was unnecessary and distracting. But all in all it had a good pacing and I liked it.
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteWell, it's not like there was a paragraph after paragraph describing the act, lol.
Actually, I kind of like the fact it was in there, but the author tastefully chose to skip over the details. :P
Manly Tears were shed.
ReplyDeleteGreat story, really tugged at my heart strings cause I can identify with spike a little on this. Motivates me to never give and keep trying to make that special someone see the light.
ReplyDeleteWhat the hell. I post this one night and thought no one read it, and come by this blog to see that people like it. Well i'm working on something else.
ReplyDeleteNo shipping though. It's the Cutie Mark Crusaders and Spike, Snips, and Snails.
Thanks everyone! I really Appreciate it. Keep being awesome!
Also, sorry if you didn't like the sex, but I had basically thought out the whole story before even beginning to write it. Also the sex is rampant in a TON of other stories, sometimes even unnecessary. I thought that after years of being Rarity's only company due to the friends splitting up, she would finally show a little... appreciation?
ReplyDeleteAs you can see I also wanted to wrap up A LOT of stories. Gilda and Trixie are both in this fic, with basically a "happy ending" given to both of them. While this is partly to satisfy my own desires, I see the world of Equestria as a perfect Utopia, where eventually everyone comes to find their "happy ending", even if it must be through some trial and error!
The sex was all well and good if don't actually think of it in terms of pictures or even possibility. It mainly worked as a good romance element in my opinion. It added to the passion don't be sorry for it.
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteYeah, exactly. At first I was thinking "WHELP GOTTA HAVE A 20 LINE SEX SCENE IN THERE SOMEWHERE!" But then I realized that this wasn't a fapfic, and immediatley slapped myself. Thus you will find that the sex scene is like.... 1 line long and doesn't even go into intimate details.
The fic is a long one, but I like it as a contrast to all the short fics that are thrown around. Don't get me wrong I LOVE a good, quick read. It's just, sometimes you wanna sit back with a nice (insert your favorite drink here) and read a long entertaining story of My Little Pony.... right guys?
In my humble opinion, this is the best story I've read yet for FiM. The momentum building up to Spike and Rarity's first kiss is what stands out in my mind for this. A wonderful read altogether.
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment! I'm glad you liked it!
This is my first writing I ever did. I was frustrated about how there were no Spike/Rarity fics despite it being in the cartoon (albeit used mostly as a joke... but then again EVERYTHING is a joke in the cartoon). I don't mind the other ships, but seeing Rainbow Dash x Pinkie for the 5th time irked me.
@Cottonmouth
ReplyDeleteFor a first writing I gatta say it was pretty damn good. I think spike/rarity was a damn good choice. Its a perfect source to write a story of unrequited love which later blossoms into true romance. I feel spike/rarity can let you make any kind of story you want in how they get from A to B.
I hope a drawfriend likes this story enough to make a pic or two for it. I know we have the grown spike looking at the picture and shedding a tear but I'd like to see something like spike and rarity side by side or him looking into her eyes when he tells her he will always love her.
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteI think that's one of the primary reasons it turned out decent. It's not a hard thing to write for (most of the ships aren't hard to write for actually), which is why I was surprised no one ever did it!
Sorry for all the posting I'm doing Blog Brony. I'm afraid you might think I'm trying to spam my own story with comments to get it read, but I just love talking with the readers about what was good/bad with it.
@Cottonmouth
ReplyDeleteIt's fine, Authors can't get better unless they talk with their readers right?
@Cottonmouth
ReplyDeleteWhat sethisto said. Reader author interaction is good for writing.
So, with all the praise this is getting... any particular reason this isn't marked as 'popular'?
ReplyDelete@Pecan
ReplyDeleteTagged it
@Sethisto
ReplyDeletePopular huh? Mighty kind of you Blog Brony.
I just want to say what a stroke of luck this is. I'm pretty sure if I had posted this story before the blog was made or at a time when you weren't surfing the threads, it would never have seen the light of day.
The blog allows long fics like these to exist. The threads simply move too fast to keep up with so much stuff, but the blog has it in one place, unmoving. Thanks for picking this up! I probably would have been too lazy to ask you to post it, so you basically saved this story from unreadability.
Spike + Rule 63 = ???
ReplyDelete@Cottonmouth
ReplyDeleteYou deserve it friend. This is great story to warm the heart.
Anon 1300? or was it 1700? from the Google doc chat. And I guess I already gave you my feedback there, but keep on the good work! Also, great chat we had.
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteHah yeah, thanks for all of that. Good critique you threw out, and the conversation we had between everybody in the fic last night was just crazy.
Definitely a fun time, AND I learned some good stuff from it.
Honestly, this is the best MLP fanfic that I've read... and I just read Swayback Mountain a few hours ago. Both stories are excellent and have their strong points, but I feel that A Long Time Coming is the better fanfic... only slightly.
ReplyDeleteRarity and Spike's relationship is magical, and this story really tugged at me. I'm hoping for an episode in the series to come based solely on the two, but this will more than suffice for the time being.
Thank you.
@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteYou people make me cry. You make me feel so loved.
I definitely desire an episode with Spike and Rarity, but I'm not sure it will ever come. Heck, I'm not even sure if a Spike-centric episode will ever come.
Still, thanks for reading the fic. It means a lot to me, and I am glad you love the fic.
Sorry I havn't been able to produce any new content as of late. I currently just mowed through 2 exams today, and have 2 more exams tomorrow that I am studying for now. When this weekend begins, HOPEFULLY expect a short story from me before Sunday ends.
@Cottonmouth
ReplyDeleteNo need to apologize. I'm sure a lot of us are busy... I certainly am.
Anyone could go and ask Lauren Faust about upcoming episodes, I guess - but I really don't want to pester her. Better for her to spend her time on the series rather than responding to Deviantart comments...
I literally could not stop smiling the entire time I read the epilogue. I even heard 'Wedding March' play in my head when Rarity came out. Awesome work, sir. Awesome work.
ReplyDeleteamazing, i just read both parts and i found it amazingly easy to "watch" in my head.. it was like reading an episode.
ReplyDeletebut i agree it could have done without the sex scene, however short it was
The Epilogue is linked wrong?
ReplyDeleteJust saying
@Anonymous
ReplyDeletefixd
@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteHmmm Another one down on the sex scene huh? Damn.
It's just... when I get typing... I can't stop. My hands literally fly all over the place and I look back up to see words written.
I guess my hands wanted a Dragon/Pony sex scene. What the fuck hands?
But honestly I won't have any regrets. I'm glad you at least enjoyed the rest.
...This is the only good shipping story.
ReplyDeleteThe. Only. Good. One.
Go write Romance stories, dude.
Romance Magazines always need better stories, and you seem like the type of person who could deliver these better stories.
Extremely well written, and much effort put forth into it... but it made me too sad to like it. Might sound lame, but this whole pony thing has made me generally happier than I've been in quite a while.
ReplyDeleteThen, in the first part, everyone getting seperated... just tore me apart. Im loving the whole fandom, then it's "shoved" in my face that it's going to end someday. That and I too have a small group of close friends that... are seeming to end up this way. Maybe not tomorrow, but you get the point.
Anywho, cheers on causing me to reflect about life!
Purely wonderful. I was reading so long I was up past when I really ought to have gotten to bed, and then stayed up longer to read the epilogue. Beautiful, absolutely loved it. I shed tears more than once.
ReplyDeleteThis is one of the best fanfics I've ever read! Aw, and I just LOVE SpikexRarity it's so sweet... I feel that I must thank you for this wonderful story so...
ReplyDeleteTHANK YOU COTTONMOUTH.
Oh, a Spike and Rarity episode, or even a Spike centric one, would be great. One can always dream...
Dear Celestia that epilogue was AMAZING!! It was such a beautiful story and the I think I'm at a loss for words but its fantastic.
ReplyDeleteCottonmouth you are truly something great to be honest the first part of this story is what motivated me to write my own spike/rarity story.
By the way reading brony = me now
This was brilliant, simple as that.
ReplyDeleteI've just spent my lunch reading both of these stories, I have tears in my eyes and a warm fuzzy feeling all over..
Sadly now I must get back to my databases.. Thank you Mr Author, I think I'll re-read these tonight.
I kinda wonder how soft a bed of gold coins could actually be...
ReplyDeleteBut this was amazingly sweet. Thanks for writing the epilogue!
Ha! The name I usually post under is Cottonmouth but my Google Account is Lumpfish! What to choose. Oh well.
ReplyDeleteI can't push in how much these comments mean to me. I mean for gods sake the night I posted A Long Time Coming, absolutely NO one talked about it in the thread, and I thought I had wasted my time writing a fan fic that was too long for people to read.
Needless to say when I found out the blog brony had uploaded it and it had 10 comments I jumped for joy. Now it has like... 40.
Funny enough, despite it being one of the longest fics on the blog, I felt the need to extend it by another 3,000 words!
Thank all of you for reading, and keep being an awesome fandom.
That epilogue was amazing... I can't even come up with the words to describe how touching this is. Perfect execution all around.
ReplyDeleteI hope this won't be your last fanfic.
All my respect goes to the author! I can't come up with words to describe how... how perfect this fanfic is!
ReplyDeleteThat was the greatest fanfic I've ever read, thank you for writing it Cottonmouth/Lumpfish!!!
ReplyDeleteThis was a well written story. And I'd think the build-up to it was perhaps the shining crown of it all.
ReplyDeleteGood job, I expect great things from you.
@blackyousa
ReplyDeleteHa, what a burden.
I'm in college and typing up My Little Pony fanfiction. If you had told me half a year ago I'd be doing this, I'd have laughed my ass off.
I remember when I first saw the screen shots of the show on /co/ I basically just laughed.
Then I saw on the top 5 posts that there was a fucking dragon in the show (It was Spike, I joined a day after the first episode).
Also want to give a wave to Vanderblast. I'm reading your Spike and Rarity fic right now and eagerly awaiting the next installment.
Also if this Friday's episode doesn't have Spike, expect me to rage.
Once again, thank you all for reading and commenting AND rating. It means so much to me, and without you, this epilogue would have never been written.
I saw you post on /co/ about town names or something. Does this mean you're working on something new?
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteJust e-mailed it to the Blog Owner.
Should be up rather soon I reckon.
@Cottonmouth
ReplyDeleteI never got anything from you dood! Email it again!
Anonpony here, just needed to comment *for the first time on this site* that this is hands down the best fanfic ive read. Perfectly written, never dull, always heart warming. And Spikes one lucky guy, nuff said.
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteI constantly have people telling me this is the best fic on the sight yet never see it mentioned on /co/ when fanfics come into discussion.
I presume my audience is mostly blog centered, as I only post my stories in the threads one time, and that's usually at 3AM as well.
Everyone here critiquing and commenting on my work is what motivates me to write. Thank you so much for taking your time to leave your thoughts on the blog. It means a lot to me.
>lazy town
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteI always hear that this fic is one of the best on the site, but never see it brought up in the /co/ threads.
I presume that I gained mostly a separate audience from the usual trip users of the threads due to the time that this came out and simply to the fact that I only post my stories one time in the threads.
Still, don't mean to complain, because I have gained a TON of feedback from this fic. Thank you for your kind words sir, they motivate me to keep writing and help improve myself.
Beautiful.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely beautiful. Loved every moment of the story. One of the best MLP FiM fics out there.
@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteAlways warms my heart to see when someone digs up this story.
And thanks for the compliment. I aim to please!
I just wanted to leave you a comment saying how much I enjoyed this story! I thought it was very well written, and I loved the way you wrote all the characters. Very awesome and adorable.
ReplyDeleteOne of the best fics I've read on this site. I'd give you 6 stars if I could.
@Meta Omega
ReplyDeleteThank you for the compliment. I find it interesting that even to this day this fic still helps motivate me to keep writing.
...And then I shipped Spike/Rarity!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoy longer stories and stories in the future always capture my interest.
I didn't have a problem with the sexy part per se...it's just as Spike gets older, the logistics of it become mind boggling. Still, I thought it worked for what you wanted to do.
@Sir Keldeo
ReplyDeleteHa! Just trying to fight against all the Rarity/Applejack fics out there.
The "sexy" stuff is definitely the most controversial thing in the fic. Glad it didn't take away from the experience for you.
I thought it was great but one thought kept distracting me.
ReplyDeleteThe size difference between Spike and Rarity. Dont get me wrong, i loved the story, but it was strange for me to envision a building sized Spike with a small Rarity.
Once a gain im not tryin to give of any negative criticism, i loved it
@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteSize doesn't stop true love.
Lol.
No but seriously.
Thanks for reading anyways.
Quite the shame, I never read this earlier simply because it was RarityxSpike. I like Rarity a lot (take that however you may XD) and I thought pairing her with Spike would have been some weird idea thought up only by someone looking for a cheap lulz. I decided to give this a chance after seeing that it has 5 stars, and....... I couldn't help but root for Spike throughout the whole story.
ReplyDeleteNot only did you treat each of the characters with care and utilize them properly, but you also wrote something truly touching. I will admit that any story that has close friends becoming distant over time will always get to me. Putting together a growing up story and a regretful-decision love story just really made it twice as powerful to me.
Also, it probably helps that I have been looking into ethical controversy of relationships like these between characters and how it affects those involved as well those that get forcibly involve themselves. Not that that was heavily touched upon here, nor did it need to be. Still, what you have written here makes for a nice point of reference for something I plan to write someday.
Also, dat epilogue. It was just such a happy and peaceful ending. I tend to get jealous of characters that get to be happy. ;_;
Good job, sir, and may your future literature be just as lovingly crafted.
@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteWow! What a nice post! I definitely did not make this for some cheap lulz. Spike and Rarity are two of my favorite characters in the show, and seeing Spike fawn after her always makes me smile.
It's interesting. Although I started out wanting to make this fic JUST Spike and Rarity, the whole gang ended up worming their way in.
Thank you for your blessings. I will strive to work harder for readers like you.
weirdestboner.jpg
ReplyDeleteTo be honest? I wasn't as into this one as much as I expected based on the comments. Opinions are opinions, though, and it's great to see that you are getting quite a lot of positive feedback on this one. Nevertheless, I feel like voicing my own thoughts. I somehow just didn't get too absorbed into the conflicts that were there. They don't really pile up very much. When Spike stopped sending the letters, I think the sense of worry that was in Rarity could have been developed a bit better. When Twilight came barging in I was expecting something terrible to have happened to Spike and thought that the ponies would go on an adventure together to save him, and when it turned out that Spike had just returned to Ponyville it seemed like a bit of a letdown, a missed opportunity to raise the stakes a bit.
ReplyDeleteStill, the characterization is well-done and I can understand people giving it such praise. Just saying, wasn't for me.
Oh, and I didn't mind the sex. There was just the right lack of detail and lack of time spent in that situation to keep it entirely away from clopfic territory, and I think it's good that that aspect of the relationship was at least acknowledged.
@BronyMike
ReplyDeleteIt's amazing how much better my writing has become ever since this fic.
This is a shipping fic. Shit WILL get blown out of proportion. Some of the most mediocre fics on this site are praised to hell and back simply because it has some romance in it.
Perhaps you would have liked the ending I had originally planned, where Spike actually fell asleep for 100 years and awoke to find everyone but Twilight dead.
Thank you for your critique, but it's kind of 2 months too late.
Still, I'm going to give you some advice. If you thought the conflict here was not 'absorbing' enough, don't read any of the other shipping fics on this site.
Just a tip.
Ahaha. Alright, alright. And yeah, I'm quite a bit behind on my fic-readin'. Also, I'm not well-read on shipfics at all so I suppose I didn't know what to expect.
ReplyDeleteI cried manly tears, and I'm damn proud of it!
ReplyDeleteA few parts I would have enjoyed more if they were built up a little, such as responses to the letters. But since the story itself isn't overly large, in comparison is it properly depicted. Thanks for the read.
God damn my sentimentality.
ReplyDeleteI cried like a bitch.
I cried manly tears as well. this is an amazing fic, I enjoed it heartily. There isn't enough RarityxSpike...
ReplyDelete@the dashing hero *enjoyed
ReplyDelete@the dashing hero
ReplyDeleteDamn right there isn't. It saddens me greatly.
Stalliongrad?! I see what you did there.
ReplyDelete@Cottonmouth
ReplyDeleteI would write some myself, but in all honesty I don't think I'm that good at fics...
very nice wonderfuly done. one of my favorites.
ReplyDeleteI really liked this story. Heartwarming and a little life sadness thrown in, but everything turned out alright in the end too. Longer than most fanfics on ED and it kept me entertained during an otherwise boring day. Plus, Rarity stories are always great. (even if it was more centered on Spike)
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to come back three months later and tell you how awesome you are. Back in February when I joined the fandom this was the very first fanfic I read. It was the first time I cried in ages. I loved the story and it is still one of my favorites.
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteI love going back and reading my favorite fics. I'm glad you still find that this fic holds up well. Thank you for your supportive comment!
Cottonmouth, I thought that was amazing. I have always gotten SO mad that Rarity never loved spike. GREAT JOB ignore mean comments cuz this will always be one of the greatest!!
ReplyDeletePardon me, neighbor, but I'm all out of D'AWWWWWWWWWWW, and was hoping you'd be able to lend me some.
ReplyDeleteI want you to know that you are as perfect as this match was in your head. Thank you, thank you, thank you for writing this.
ReplyDeleteAnd manly tears were shed by all.
ReplyDeleteGoogle Docs banned this fic!? But it's too perfect!
ReplyDeleteNot sure if anybody actually reads this far down in the comments, but I still want to say this for some odd reason…
ReplyDeleteCouldn't Rarity have Twilight cast an enlargement spell on her like she did with the photo? So Spike and Rarity could…you know…do it…
Feels wrong to say it, but it's quite logical isn't it? Not sure how Twilight would react…Luna damnit this getting wrong fast!…
Way to go, Spike!
ReplyDeleteThis story made me cry, several times, and for various reasons. And i agree, Spike and Rarity stories are too few and far between
ReplyDeleteNot often I'll read a story that feels so complete in it's ending. Whenever I do, I feel like a happy void that's come to an end (I swear that's not to sound as suicidal as it could be interpretted).
ReplyDeleteJob well done. I'm glad I ctrl+F'd Spike in the Story Archive tonight.
manly tears were shed... an excellent, well written piece. good job.
ReplyDeleteWell, reading for several minutes, I've gathered that in this particular fanfic, most of the happiness and friendship and awesome has steadily been dying. Now, mind you, I'm the kind of person who prefers bottling emotions up and then locking them in a box in the basement for fear of judgement. That being said, ponies are so freaking amazing that I shattered out of my shell a bit, and literally forced them down my friend's throat. (now he's a brony for life also, heheheh) Now, ALL THAT being said, I can't continue reading. It would completely ruin the one thing that made my summer not quite so boring/shitty, because ponies are supposed to reside in a magical floating bubble of awesome that can't be touched by the tragic realities of life. As soon as I realized this fanfic for what it was, that bubble exploded out of fucking nowhere, making me quite honestly dejected. WHY. THE PONIES. THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE TIMELESS. Y U NO SUNSHINE/MAGIC? I'm closing this...
ReplyDeleteEurgh, to hell with however it turned out. Mah magic brony brain can't process the information.
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteWhat
the
hell.
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I have two computers that I'm now having problems with. yesterday, my first computer shut down and said "RPC has been terminated". everytime I restart that computer, it gives me another 1:00 minute shut down warning. I know I need to change the settings of the RPC, but it shuts down before I can ever get to it. is there another way to fix this? The second computer messed up today. I was researching how to fix the other RPC problem and my computer shut down. when it rebooted, I now have "Internet security 2010" installed and I can't delete it. I had a similiar virus before and was able to manually delete the virus, but this one won't let me open task manager or the registry to delete it. it's even taken over my Internet and won't let me on. so I'm stuck trying to research problems on my iPhone. I read somewhere that if you can't get task manager to open that you need to wipe out your hard drive. I am wanting to do this but I can't find my reinstallation CD for this computer which is an emachines. however, I have the installation cd for the other computer with the RPC problem, but that computer is a Dell. can I install a Dell operating system on my emachines? they're both windows XP.
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I'm not really one that's big on the Spike/Rarity shipping, but this was definately well worth the time spent reading.
ReplyDeleteI'm not really one that's big on the Spike/Rarity shipping, but this was definately well worth the time spent reading.
ReplyDeleteThere aren't many RarityXSpike shipfics out there. Most of those that do exist aren't that great.
ReplyDeleteThis is a wonderful exception. Good job on this one.
I cried while reading this. Cried of sadness. Cried of happiness. Cried because it was so fucking awesome. Thank you, Cottonmouth.
ReplyDeletePS: Your name is too damn silly.
I'm so happy I clicked on that link in the Gem comic comments.
ReplyDeleteCottonmouth, that was incredible.
@Forderz
ReplyDeleteThank you both Favo and Fordez for the nice response.
Really, while the story is pretty flawed and definitely not up to par with the fics that are on the blog these days, I respect it's age and still look back upon it with fond memories.
Once again, thank you for the read.
I'm gonna be honest, I didn't like this as much as some of the people above me seemed to have liked it. I mean, I like the general idea, and don't worry, I've read enough ship-fics that I understand that the "conflict" contained within is often of the weaker variety, and so to set my standards lower. I'll also give you that the sex was very tastefully done.
ReplyDeleteHowever, there were a number of spelling and grammatical errors throughout both chapters, and some of them were definitely more distracting than I'd like. Also, I think that sometimes, the dialogue could be kinda stiff, and clunky sounding, at least when I read it. However, there was something more about it that was bothering me, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out what it was.
Couldn't figure out what it was, that is, until I got to the phrase "priest pony" and then it hit me: this fic seriously reminded me of my old shitty fic (well, one of them, anyway, and if you ever happen to stumble across my account, you'll know which one) on my FF.net account (which happens to be the same name as this), except nowhere near as atrocious.
So, in the end, I give it 4/5, because I was gonna give it a 3, but then I realized that whole "reminding me of my mistakes" thing, and thought that that wouldn't be fair to you. However, I can't give it a 5, either, because of those aforementioned mistakes, plus the fact that it feels kinda rushed. I dunno. Anyway, perhaps sometime, when I have the time, I'll look up some of your newer FiMfics, and see how much you've really improved.
I quite enjoyed it. True, there were grammatical and spelling errors, but even bestselling authors need editors.
ReplyDeleteAll in all, the realism behind the emotions, specifically Rarity's, was such a refreshing change of pace. Typically, a shipfic will stay true to character, but not true to real life. Having Rarity struggle with her own feelings was what made this story.
That being said, I would have liked to read what happened between the first and second parts.
@Jonny Manz
ReplyDeleteAgree completely.
Every time I go back and read every story I've ever written I feel like an idiot.
Still, fond memories.
Am i the only one that didnt cry?! D:
ReplyDeleteanyway, great story! The sex was fine, i always hate it when people whine about sex in fanfics, as long as its not clop. I loved the story, I've always wondered how a rarityxspike ship-fic would turn out, and this one is great! Keep up the good work!
My task is done.
ReplyDeleteI love it
ReplyDeleteWow, just amazing, just spent I think 2 hours reading this slowly
ReplyDeleteA year later, this fan fiction should have more attention. Great job Cottonmouth. This was beautiful. Spike and Rarity made one of the greatest fanfics ever.
ReplyDeletePretty good! :3 Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteYou guys outta read "Scented Venom" by SoundofRainfall. I'd say your writing is just as good. :D Warning: There is a lot of creepiness in this fic. e.e
Pretty good! :3 Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteYou guys outta read "Scented Venom" by SoundofRainfall. I'd say your writing is just as good. :D Warning: There is a lot of creepiness in this fic. e.e
This is fantastic. I'm commenting even though I'm only halfway through, but I'm wiping the tears off my reddened cheeks and smiling, saying a silent thank you to Cottonmouth for bringing such beauty into the world.
ReplyDeletei was furious at how twilight was like "spike you will never have rarity!:D"
ReplyDeleteI dont usually post. comments but this is an exception. I enjoyed everything about this story and can only hope I can ones similar to it. Congratulations writer!
ReplyDelete