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Equestria Daily Settings

  • Story: Fluttershy Gets a Paper Cut

    by Cereal Velocity

    [Grimdark] [Comedy]

    Author: Filler
    Description: And then Fluttershy got a paper cut.

    Fluttershy Gets a Paper Cut

    Additional Tags: Paper, Cut, Blood, Hysteria, Ridiculous
    Tuesday, September 13, 2011 op 2:00 PM
    Labels: Author: Filler, comedy, Complete, Fanfiction, Fluttershy, Grimdark, Rainbow Dash, Star-4, Story, Twilight Sparkle
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    92 comments:

    1. Kim Fluttershy DykasSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:00 PM

      It got up? IT GOT UP!!! I found this one pretty hilarious. Just "see" the actions happening, and you should get a good laugh.

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    2. Ditzy DerpSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:00 PM

      nooooooo not Fluttershy wwwhhyyyyy~

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    3. GlomkettleSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:01 PM

      Oh god someone actually wrote it

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    4. DetoxicitySeptember 13, 2011 at 2:01 PM

      Quick! Take it down! This is too just TOO MUCH. I understand the Discord Spoilers (abit much) I even can sort of understand Cupcakes. This is just plain wrong.

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    5. HanselSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:02 PM

      Hahaha, I knew this was gonna happen eventually. VERY grimdark, blood will run in rivers...

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    6. A1CZEROSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:02 PM

      I was waiting for someone to write this.
      Knew someone would.

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    7. SombreonSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:07 PM

      See what you have done? There's just no limitation this community. >.<

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    8. AnonymousSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:08 PM

      Oh my goodness! How can you people claim to love these characters, then put them through such misery, turning them into torture victims and serial killers and evil tyrants and war veterans! HAVE YOU NO SHAME, LEAVE FLUTTERSHY ALONE!!!

      /standard emotional anti-grimdark douchebag rant

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    9. MuffinShySeptember 13, 2011 at 2:10 PM

      No, No Noooo. I must not read, but the TEMPTATION, but FlutterShy oh..my...

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    10. MintelleSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:12 PM

      I knew this was brewing somewhere!


      -Minty

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    11. Nyte_CrawlerSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:12 PM

      Was an entertaining quick read.

      Spoiler: Nobody Dies or is seriously injured.

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    12. Clock KeeperSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:15 PM

      I must be missing the grimdark of this.

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    13. bloopSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:15 PM

      Was waiting to see this show up

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    14. SketchySeptember 13, 2011 at 2:16 PM

      Someone actually wrote this XD?
      Now Im waiting for an Applejack blueberry fic XD

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    15. Mather MaddoxSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:18 PM

      And to make a long story short, it got infected and she died...

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    16. AnonymousSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:19 PM

      You're all horrible, horrible people.

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    17. Spikely WhiplashSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:21 PM

      Well, seeing as nopony died or was permanently maimed or anything, I'm fine with this story.

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    18. CelestiaSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:21 PM

      Fluttershy gets a grimdark tag for this, I shudder to think what word would have to be invented should anything really bad happen.

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    19. AnonymousSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:22 PM

      I have no idea if you all are being serious or not.

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    20. Rarity Unicorn (BakedBad)September 13, 2011 at 2:23 PM

      Great, now I am going to have nightmare for weeks.

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    21. CelestiaSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:24 PM

      On another note i'm not sure I really liked this story. Im very very picky about comedy fics and I just didn't find this too funny, perhaps it just isn't what i felt like reading.

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    22. HeartmendSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:24 PM

      I died laughing upon seeing the title. I can't believe someone wrote a fanfic about this. Normally I HATE grimdark, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to read this!

      XD XD XD

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    23. AnonymousSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:25 PM

      The grimdark tag is well deserved. Fluttershy + paper cut = nightmares for the rest of your life

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    24. SpitfireSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:25 PM

      I knew i shouldn't have read this before going to bed! Now i know i can't sleep with all these horrible images floating in my mind. This is gonna haunt me for a long time.

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    25. Pinkie PieSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:27 PM

      Oh no! Hang in there, Fluttershy!
      IS THERE A DOCTOR IN THE AUDIENCE!?

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    26. KurbzSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:29 PM

      Odd gridmark tag is odd.

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    27. GaruuSpikeSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:29 PM

      Oh god. I lol'd. So hard.

      XD

      You guys are all wusses, blood is a device used in literature to emphasize the seriousness of a situation. Geddoverit

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    28. AnonymousSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:30 PM

      While it's ridiculous, it's not all that funny. Whosoever wrote this hasn't quite grasped the pacing and timing required for good comedy.

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    29. YetAnotherBronySeptember 13, 2011 at 2:32 PM

      @GaruuSpike:

      But when her blood literally spewed everywhere...it goes from serious to grimdark, and then rolls over to WTF?

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    30. Cobalt CometSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:32 PM

      I just KNEW someone was going to write this. For a while I was thinking of writing it. lol

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    31. DJnickbetaSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:34 PM

      I had an idea for something along these lines. It was going to be called "On My Desk by Monday," and it was basically a compilation of all of the fanfiction Cereal had joked about. Nice to see someone actually do it!

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    32. HeartmendSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:38 PM

      This was hilarious! It was just so over-the-top. XD

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    33. EwyndallSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:40 PM

      I laughed when I saw the title xDD

      Phoe, I hope you are happy XD

      See what happens when you do a podcast? :P

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    34. geldonyetichSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:41 PM

      Not a very deep story, but an excellent bit of meta grimdark parody.

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    35. Whistle-tallSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:42 PM

      I just had a silly mid-afternoon chuckle. I needed that, thank you Filler. =D

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    36. fizzlefistSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:42 PM

      i must've missed the comedy portion... i've got a sometimes grim/morbid sense of humor and all, but it just kind of fell flat for me

      i guess i'd give it a meh? not a bad story, but not much to it

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    37. nemrynSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:42 PM

      Yeah, it's a great idea, but it needs work. It needs, I don't know how to say it, more drama? Purpler prose? It needs to be like the pie fight at the end of Over A Barrel.

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    38. BJ ChillSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:44 PM

      Oh, that was...
      Just what the hay WAS that, anyway?

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    39. TosxychorSeptember 13, 2011 at 2:48 PM

      LOL, do you mean just blood triggers the grimdark tag? Totally undeserved. Dark humor is more a fitting description.

      The story is lighthearted guys, it's just that the atmosphere is kinda weird O.o I'd give it 3 stars.

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    40. FabulousJeremySeptember 13, 2011 at 3:00 PM

      Not even remotely grimdark lol.

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    41. EwyndallSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:01 PM

      Read it.

      I smiled. It's funny :) And don't worry folks, don't let the Grimdark tag scare you off.
      It's just plain ridiculous xD

      And yes I agree with the above. I would work on the story a bit, to put some more drama in it, but apart from that, I like the structure of the story and the concept :)

      Definitly worths a read :)

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    42. FamusJamusSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:03 PM

      @Tosxychor You'd be surprised. I've seen someone say a story needed a grimdark tag simply for containing the words "horn/wing/head rot" and having Pinkie scoop bits of her head into several bowls off-screen.

      However, a paper cut is totally justified in having that tag. One can only wonder the absolute fear and horror going through Fluttershy's mind. XD

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    43. WierdplatformerSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:04 PM

      Mmhmm... I chuckled a little. Way over the top.

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    44. nemrynSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:05 PM

      Yeah, it's caught somewhere between the pseudo-grim of OAB, and the hyperbolic absurdity of 'suddenly, oceans of blood everywhere!!!' It needs to be one or the other.

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    45. KragtSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:05 PM

      XD Crap... I was 2/3rds finished with my story on this same subject. >>

      Oh well. I suck at writing anyways. XD

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    46. banannagramSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:09 PM

      I love this thing. I was only confused a little, and only until a quarter way through.

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    47. ---September 13, 2011 at 3:10 PM

      Fluttershy... Papercut... Grimdark comedy? Ok i definitely need to read this when I get home...Fluttershy... Papercut... Grimdark comedy? Ok i definitely need to read this when I get home...

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    48. Cwhite17September 13, 2011 at 3:24 PM

      So happy that someone actually wrote this XD

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    49. AnonymousSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:30 PM

      THIS IS THE STORY OF A DAY WHERE THERE WAS ALL THIS BLOOD. A MAN WAS WALKING AROUND AND BLOOD STARTED COMING OUT OF HIM EVERYWHERE. THERE WAS SO MUCH BLOOD THAT IT FILLED UP AN ELEVATOR. HE WENT TO THE STORE AND THERE WAS JUST BLOOD ALL OVER THE PLACE! PEOPLE WERE SLIPPING IN IT AND THEY WERE ALL GROSSED OUT. HE TRIED TO GO SWIMMING AND ALL OF THE SHARKS WENT NUTS AND BITTENED EVERYBODY. HE GOT CHASED BY ALL THE VAMPIRES EVER. ONE TIME THE BLOOD GOT A KID AND A DOG. AT THE END OF THE DAY EVERYONE DECIDED THEY WOULD SEND HIM TO SPACE SO THAT HE WOULD STOP GETTING BLOOD EVERY WHERE. THE SCARIEST PART IS THAT THE MAN WAS YOU!!! (OR HE WAS A LADY IF YOU ARE A LADY) AND YOU FORGOT THAT THIS HAPPENED.

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    50. ZarkanorfSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:32 PM

      This is beyond perfect.

      You three blogponies need to come up with more silly story ideas.

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    51. FlameheartSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:34 PM

      The Horror, The horror...

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    52. Dubs RewatcherSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:51 PM

      It was cool, I guess...

      But the way you write is pretty confusing. I feel like you should have just told the story straight, not bounced in between times.

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    53. NubnuberSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:55 PM

      as soon as i saw the title i laughed my head off

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    54. JesusSeptember 13, 2011 at 3:55 PM

      A story about misunderstanding, i guess the grim dark tag represents the use of the word blood.

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    55. SpitszsSeptember 13, 2011 at 4:04 PM

      I've waited so long for this to finally show up after the first mention of it.

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    56. EpesiSeptember 13, 2011 at 4:18 PM

      THE SCARIEST PART IS THAT THE FLUTTERSHY WAS YOU!!!

      That was...something. The idea was sort of interesting, and I thought the zombie horde fake-out was amusing.

      It all just fell apart for me when Fluttershy still insisted on going to the Mayor while gushing blood everywhere. I don't think she'd ever knowingly inconvenience that many people. It might have worked better if the blood flow increased gradually, allowing her to shrug it off as insignificant.

      Buuut...I guess this isn't the sort of story where that matters, is it. The absolute, ludicrously over-the-top blood gushing is the whole point. So...meh. I don't know what to make of it.

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    57. HivemindSeptember 13, 2011 at 4:19 PM

      What in the name of Celestia is wrong with you guys?!

      First it was Fluttershy goes to hell, and now this. I hate you all

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    58. BlinkySeptember 13, 2011 at 4:25 PM

      Great title, but the story itself wasn't really funny. It's ridiculous, but it didn't make me chuckle at any point. It was still a decent read, kept me interested in how Fluttershy's blood flood would end.

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    59. SindriSeptember 13, 2011 at 4:32 PM

      dammit Cereal...

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    60. SYLOHSeptember 13, 2011 at 4:35 PM

      OH CELESTIA! There was blood EVERYWHERE!
      And it is hilarious!

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    61. CyanideInsanitySeptember 13, 2011 at 4:37 PM

      of course it happened... lol. i wonder though, before reading is it going to be facepalm-or rather facehoof, for stupidity that we like.

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    62. Sonar009September 13, 2011 at 4:53 PM

      What... I...

      Huh. Alright, then.

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    63. PunchinPaulSeptember 13, 2011 at 5:02 PM

      XD this was great

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    64. Baseball4life374September 13, 2011 at 5:05 PM

      FUCK YES I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

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    65. CátsySeptember 13, 2011 at 5:19 PM

      sigh you guys need to watch what you say in those podcasts! lol

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    66. AnonymousSeptember 13, 2011 at 5:22 PM

      I seriously thought that Rainbow Dash was some kind of zombie at first when it mentioned her knocking on Fluttershy's window! XD

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    67. KShrikeSeptember 13, 2011 at 5:22 PM

      Fluttershy get's a paper cut.
      -mfw grimdark tag.

      LOL?

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    68. FordSeptember 13, 2011 at 5:26 PM

      Let's see...Grimdark...and comedy. A Pavlovian duet of pleasures!

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    69. Dusty the Royal JanitorSeptember 13, 2011 at 5:33 PM

      @Nyte_Crawler

      Thank you. Sometimes it can be hard to tell when people on the internet are joking...

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    70. LudovicianSeptember 13, 2011 at 5:38 PM

      The title was funnier than the story itself in my opinion. The characterisations of the mane cast was way off which kind of ruined it for me.

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    71. Arion A.September 13, 2011 at 5:42 PM

      Haha this was hilarious!

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    72. AnonymousSeptember 13, 2011 at 6:01 PM

      i hope I'm not a bad person for finding this hilarious

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    73. MelodiaSeptember 13, 2011 at 6:26 PM

      See this is what I find so silly. This is NOT grimdark. At all. No dark here. Yes, lots of blood, sure. But /it's all played for laughs/. I mean, yeesh. A fricken paper cut.

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    74. NotAGoodUsername360September 13, 2011 at 6:34 PM

      Oh, dear... talk about high blood pressure... XD

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    75. TheBlackBaronSeptember 13, 2011 at 6:58 PM

      Having a Grimdark tag is itself part of what earns it a Comedy tag.

      Yep. The fanfiction archives just went meta.

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    76. IntegraSeptember 13, 2011 at 7:07 PM

      SO MUCH BLOOD.

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    77. Brian JohnsonSeptember 13, 2011 at 7:08 PM

      As it turns out, Twilight's spell had little to do with the constant bleeding, Fluttershy has leukemia. In fact, Twi may have saved her life with continuous regeneration of hemoglobin.

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    78. Blayze KohimeSeptember 13, 2011 at 7:22 PM

      Fluttershy gets a papercut? Why isn't this labeled "Grimdark as Fuck"?

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    79. StormcloudSeptember 13, 2011 at 7:42 PM

      That was both vaguely gross and vaguely funny.

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    80. HolySeptember 13, 2011 at 8:03 PM

      So... that's grimlight?

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    81. KayrielSeptember 13, 2011 at 8:24 PM

      @Celestia

      [Murder Dark Rampage Psychoslaughter Bloodfall Eternal Damnation]

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    82. GeorgeBarrosoSeptember 13, 2011 at 8:29 PM

      i cant relive he did it, he actually got it on EqD

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    83. Storm RiderSeptember 13, 2011 at 8:40 PM

      I got the reference. I was laughing throughout the whole story because of it.

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    84. reynard61September 13, 2011 at 10:39 PM

      Introducing...CUTTERSHY! (The only thing missing is the Vampire Goth atmosphere.)

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    85. IntelligencePendingSeptember 13, 2011 at 11:12 PM

      Everyone snipes Fluttershy with grimdark simply because she is the most innocent pony there could ever be. She will get revenge sometime, you know. Push her around enough and she might just pull a cupcakes.

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    86. SolarnSeptember 14, 2011 at 2:01 AM

      Jesus fucking Christ, do you people have no sense of humour? It has a Grimdark tag because it's a PARODY of Grimdark fics. It's not very funny on its own, but it becomes much funnier when you compare it to real Grimdark fics. The plot, the pacing, the writing style, everything makes fun of those.

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    87. Jonny ManzSeptember 14, 2011 at 8:22 AM

      Hahaha, the image of Fluttershy with a blood cannon on one of her forelegs is hilarious indeed. And I agree with Solarn, it only becomes really funny when you compare it with actual Grimdark fics.

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    88. BemmoSeptember 14, 2011 at 8:34 AM

      Fluttershy gets a papercut, Grimdark...
      Papercut... Grimdark...
      Small cut... Murder and violence...
      What?
      This I gotta read.

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    89. Most interesting bronySeptember 14, 2011 at 8:21 PM

      At first I wash hah a paper cut come on. Then after I read it. Oh god twilight why and fluttershy not again

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    90. banannagramSeptember 17, 2011 at 8:33 PM

      ...


      ...


      ...



      Hmm...


      If we can get something like this, surely someone can write a long and ridiculous tale about oatmeal? Right guys?

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    91. ValikSeptember 20, 2011 at 4:29 AM

      Oatmeal? Are you crazy?

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    92. Brown BaconDecember 31, 2011 at 8:00 AM

      I just read the first sentences and it is oatmeal

      ReplyDelete
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