Did somepony go a little overboard yet again on April 1st? They should really keep him on a leash. If you want to remember what not to do for April Fools, you can find the entire day at this tag.
Your princess is going back to bed.
Showing posts with label Starlight Glimmer's Equality Inquirer. Show all posts
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The Earth Pony project was so successful, and a certain freedom fighter is causing so many issues, that the collective consciousness of everypony has decided to take our newfound GLORIOUS EQUALITY to the next level! Why struggle to continue equalizing, when the answer has literally been right under our very hooves this entire time!
We have procured the Elements of Harmony for one final EQUALIZATION! Everypony will now become rocks!
I, and a volunteers from around Equestria will be going door to door, and turning everypony into happy little stone statued versions of themselves. Join us in the ultimate comfort! Anypony that does not wish to join will be equally turned to stone regardless!
Onward to a better Equestria!
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The GREAT AND POWERFUL Trixie here freshly escaped from confinement in Starlight Glimmer's equalization camp with BREAKING NEWS! The internet has taken up in resistance to Stupidlight Dimbrain's plan and are fighting back with propoganda of their own!
The Greatest and Powerfulest Trixie will be sipping Mai Tai's out of other ponies belly buttons BEFORE YOU CAN SAY 10 MILLION BIT LAS PEGASUS CONDO.
Go get April pony things below!
VIVA LA RESISTANCE
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What's that you say little Button? Sweetie Belle's unicorn powers aren't equal? Why, that sure does sound unfair doesn't it?
All around Equestria, Earth Ponies constantly deal with obnoxious pegasus buzzing around overhead or overpowered unicorns taking their important apple picking jobs over with their incredibly un-equal magic. This cannot be allowed to stand!
Introducing: Project Earth Pony. We have found an ancient artifact that will strip both pegasus and unicorns of their "advantages" and make them just as equal as the rest of the Equestrian population! If you are either of the two mentioned races, report to the central ponyville citadel immediately for equalization.
May this bring us ever closer to a pony society that everypony can equally enjoy! -
Good news once again everypony! After five seasons of exceedingly un-equal episode air time, we have taken over the creators behind your pony cartoon and forced them to make sure everypony gets an equal amount of episodes for the 7th season.No longer will Rainbow Dash get three in a row!
Hopefully, this will end the constant bickering that takes place every time somepony doesn't appear enough, or another pony never shows up at all.
Head on down below for your 7th season episode list, now dubbed My Equal Pony!
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Greetings again everypony! Hopefully all of you are having a wonderfully normal day with your fellow mares and stallions as we continue on our path to true equality. Already I am seeing a smiles as wide as a mile on just about everypony as their ambitions fade and they embrace the freedom that is simple equality!
Unfortunately, it has come to my attention that some ponies are jealous about their bright and colorful coated brethren. These ponies, with their more muted tones, have been left literally in the dark! Fortunately the collective minds of all of Equestria have willed me to pass a new law that should hopefully combat this awfully in-equal situation.
From now forward, everypony will be required to dye their coats gray. Free dye deliveries will begin tomorrow.
Thank you everypony for continuing to create our vision for an equal Utopia! -
Hellooo everpony!~ People's Representative Starlight Glimmer here once again with another fresh announcement!
It has come to my attention that over the last few years, the concept of "Alicorn" has caused no end of strife among both the people of Earth and the ponies of Equestria. In a perfectly equal society, why would any being need so many advantages? Be your best by not being your best I always say! We wouldn't want anypony to feel unwelcome and undervalued would we?
Going forward, we have decided to ban any and all "new" alicorns and any future alicorns from displaying their wings. Coverings will be distributed soon. Both Celestia and Luna unfortunately require theirs to move the sun and moon, but we are currently looking toward a mechanical solution to hopefully replace them soon. Stay tuned!~
When nopony is special, everypony is special!
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Equestria’s core values are harmony and friendship. They are the basis on which ponies live their lives. Harmony is balance and balance is not here to shape but to keep things the same: keep things steady, on course- Equal. It is represented on the Equestrian flag: Two sisters who work in union, in tandem, as one, as Equals; to harden the straight course that guides the glorious nation of Equestria. Ponies do their parts and do their jobs and everything succeeds, because every cog of ponykind is the same: strong, resilient, Equal. Together, with the Equality we all share, we can do anything, and these are the reasons why...
(title source)
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Psst, guys... Calpain here in hiding from Starlight. After that comic post earlier today she's on the lookout for me. I can only pop up from time to time or they'll find me, but I'll try to give you news when I think I'm hidden well enough (man crawlspaces are creepy...).
Anyhow, MLP's Facebook had a little April Fool's joke today featuring Spike and while it's obviously a joke we do get to see a number of dragons that look like they are from the show! Including what looks like a female dragon.
Check on after the break for the pics and... don't tell Starlight!
Thanks to the Resistance for sending it in.
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The average and regular Trixie is here once again todazzlequietly discuss with you all a brand new completely average clothing option for everypony to keep warm with this winter. As many of you probably know, the potato harvest tends to produce an excess of cloth, and it can easily be converted into comfortable, cold-weather wear when not being used for transporting spuds. Starlight Glimmer has recommended that I, theexceptionalnormal andamazingunspecial Trixie, explain it's benefits.
Join me as we discover the art of recyclability, so that nopony has to overwork themselves to provide the ponies of Equestria with something they do not need, or something that may make them unfairly warm this year.
Review below...
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Greetings everypony! As part of our equalization process throughout the next 24 hours, we have decided to abolish the concept of careers. Each of you will now be assigned a job at random weekly. Some possible positions include the following:
- Potato farmer
- Outhouse cleaner
- Egg collector
- Mane Brusher
- Mushroom picker
- Horn polisher
- Paint remover
- Hoof massager
- Foalsitter
- and more
In order to avoid any kind of exceptionalism, once you have had a job, you will not be able to be assigned it for another year.
Thank you everypony for working to improve our world one duty at a time!
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After infiltrating the Mane 6 and taking over from within, Equestria is now on the way to becoming truly Equal.
Unfortunately, it has come to my attention that this website and the world it takes place in is not equal. Several ponies are superior to others, and that will only cause strife in the community. As a pony talented in creating a fair playing field for all, I, Starlight Glimmer, have hired myself to improve not only Equestria Daily, but the brony fandom as a whole to help better serve the ponies of Equestria.
Today, and long into the future, we are now all equal. In sameness, we will know true peace. Embrace your inner pony, but do not assume that it is any better than anypony else.
Cutie Mark removal services are mandatory and in effect immediately. Please report any community members that attempt to unbalance our new utopia by rejecting the procedure.
Throughout the day, we will be introducing new posts to help further the pony race, as well as laws and projects to do the same in between usual postings.
Onward to a new and better Equality Inquirer! One where everpony is valued the same as everypony else! You are one of many. A cog in a machine that goes in a single perfected direction without end...
Join us as we improve Equestria together!
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