Description: Rainbow Dash gets a lesson on more than just flying from he hero, Spitfire.
Spitfire and Dash as the main characters in a non-shipping story? Hmm, this looks interesting.
He hero. Good hero. Very so.You guys need a proofreader? I used to proofread publications before they were sent out to members.
Nonshipping rainbow dash spitfire!I will read this immediately!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Can't waitto read!!!!
@FordThey just need a proofreader whenever Seth is involved. He's usually the worst of it from the least amount of sleep.
@FordSheesh. 'Her' hero... 'her'. That was actually MY mistake. Yes, I accidentally sent the query email with a typo in the description. Get over it.
Read it. So totally AWESOME!!!!
Hmmm, no shipping tag with THESE two characters? TOGETHER? IN THE SAME STORY?!?!?! Wow, I'm amazed. I have to read this just for the lack of a shooing tag.
*shipping* sorry about that. Typos, what can you do about em'?
@Rainbow DashFour exclamation points? Thank you!!!!
@PinkamIna Diane PieNot a whole lot. Its almost as bad as the stupid auto correct for iPhones. I mean..... YOU try typing on iPhones with fricken hooves. Nearly impossible.
Read it. Loved it. 5 starred it. Great job!
"Rainbow Dash gets a lesson on more than just flying from he hero, Spitfire"Ok, that REALLY sound like shipping to me! I'll trust that it's not though...
@titanrisingYou're welcome!!! Its abouttime somepony wrote me doing some beyond awesome kinda race against Spitfire.
@LazulicIt absolutely is not. Not that I have anything against 'shipping' stories... this just isn't one of them.
OK, I'm impressed. Good characterizations, a fun story, well-written; yeah, this one earns five stars. I'd love to see more like it.
Dash and Spitfire? Non-shipping? What madness is this?
And one by one, ponies on this page fall victim to an attack of the flubs. I blame Screwball.
Woah, that was really, really good. The description of the run was awesome and the whole race felt intense. I especially liked the part where she flew across the Flat. The ending was nice as well, and rather heartwarming.5/5, will read more by you
@Rainbow DashOh, come on, Dashie! It's not hard to do at all! You just try too hard, that's all.It also probably wouldn't hurt (you or anypony you've ever crashed into) if you didn't type while flying. Didn't you already get three tickets for that?And a restraining order?
Whoaaa. My stars. Please, take them all. That was beautiful, and I couldn't stop reading it until it was done.-applause-
Regardless of typos, it was a great read.I kinda want this to be an episode. Having Dash and Spitfire for a whole episode would be awesome.
@BocajleboufI apologize for any typos, but without an editor a 13k+ word story might have a few.
A wonderful little story here and do I detect a little Soarin'/Spitfire at the end of this? :)
@Pinkie PieUuuhhh...... Its habit.I swear those tickets and restraining order weren't MY fault!!!! I TRIED warning Colgate, I SWEAR!!!
@titanrisingDude, you pulled off an AMAZING story. (see? I had to bust out caps lock just to express it)Just freaking amazing. This is my favorite Dash/spitfire story. Damn if you didn't build a great bit of continuity in this.Seriously, all your explanations on pegasus magic and how stuff works, all the neat moonspire run stuff, the characters where awesome, the laserboom was......look, this kicked ass, I think you get the point. don't stop writing anytime soon.
7 star story. This is now one of my favorite short stories (of all kinds) ever. That's the best Pegasus race I've read, and I've read practically all of them. Now I can't get flying out of my head.
If I could, I would give this story a 6/5 stars! I loved how you included the lore about the forest and the spire, like I could actually see it being in Equestria. I especially loved the characterization, even more that it wasn't a shipping fic! Just a slice of life fic with some awesome racing! Hope to read more from you!
@titanrisingI would tell you how much I loved the story and how epic your descriptions of pegasus magic are, but instead I'll just point your attention to the 55 5-Star ratings you have at this time.55 ponies rated your story.They all gave it the highest possible rating.I am the 55th pony.
Beautiful. Compelling. Riveting. Mesmerizing.Have a look at that star rating. See that 5.0 right there? That means more than 4.95. That's how awesome you are.This is truly the best read I had in a long while! The characters were perfect, all the descriptions, spot-on, the flight scenes were so intriguing and well-written, possibly the best ones I've read so far.Not to mention, this story totally broke my aweso-meter, I'll have to buy a new one now! XDYou sir, are an amazing writer, in all aspects, and I would be more than delighted to read more of your compositions. Please make more. <3
This is the only fic I've seen that got 5 stars from everyone that read it. This will be a 6 star story in no time.
Usually I'm not nearly this interested by long segments of non-dialogue in fanfiction. Twilight wandering around in "Twilight Sky Over Canterlot" comes to mind as the only other example besides the excellently dynamic flight scenes in this story. Both also left me with a warm sense of satisfaction after I read them, the kind that one might eloquently describe by shouting, "My stars, take all of them," or something else equally silly. This is the kind of story we simply would not have without fanfiction, and I for one am grateful to have read it. So yes, a well earned six stars, Titan.Now, stop being defensive about little typos and just be proud of making something totally radical. :D
Thanks you.Amidst the putrid sea of Grimdark, sad, and OC ponies I care nothing for you've written an amazing story. Thank you, this is the type of thing we need more of.
In the words of Rainbow Dash: SO AWESOME! I especially liked how well you characterized everyone.Pinkie Pie's "I know what we should do!" And Twilight's deadpan "Let me guess, Throw her a party? felt like they came right out of the show. The action sequences were very well written as well, and kept me so riveted, I didn't even notice the typos everypony keeps mentioning.
This was a very enjoyable read. I kinda want to see what happens next, you left some little details open and came up with some great lore. I think you could continue this story and end it with Dash becoming a Wonderbolt. That would be pretty sweet.
@RiskyWow, thanks a lot! I am a writer trying to get a few novels sold (nothing pony, unfortunately) and reading things like this helps me deal with the mountain of rejections an unpublished author receives on general principle.
I suppose that the person who made this story, with Rainbow Dash and Spitfire as the main characters, and it NOT be a shipping story, decided to make it good. Because he did. Kudos to you, awesome fanfiction-writing brony.
5 stars for sure.The only things that would have made this story any better would have been Fluttershy popping out from behnd a random object to say "Yay!"One pet peeve in fanfiction in general is the concept of alternate "booms". The Sonic Rainboom as far as I understand would be a Raimboom no matter who pulled it off. Dash's rainbow mane is purely coincidental.
Nice to see a possible 6 star story with Dash and Spitfire! Definitely deserves it. It sound like it came right out of an episode. Very well written.
@DPV111I actually contemplated that very issue while writing the scene. I decided that since each pony leaves a different contrail (Fluttershy doesn't have a rainbow contrail, and the Wonderbolts can possibly affect theirs to match each other's lightning and smoke trails) that individual sky pony magic can manifest differently. That, and Spitfire's 'boom' at the end was a completely different technique, so therefore should look different. I'm sure she could do a Rainboom if she wanted.
@titanrisingCool. Thanks for clarifying.
This is easily one of the best one-shot stories I have ever read. For realz.
I couldnt give this anything less than five stars, amazing read. The beginning felt dialog driven, with little description and building. After Dashie storms off and the story shifts it really picks up. The wonderful descriptions, lore and background building cements the story and setting and then you just hold on till the end of the ride. Since its not shipping, for once.. lol .. really feels like a MLP episode. Maybe with a lil more content a movie. Pokemon has like 12 now, why cant MLP make a few? :D :D Keep writing so we can keep enjoying the awesomeness!!
Usually, I wouldn't bother commenting. Hell, I usually wouldn't bother rating.This story, though, is awesome enough for me to change my usual habits. It's hard to say something that hasn't already been said, so I'll just say this: This story deserves all the stars it gets.
Yay! 6 Star!
So glad to see 6 stars on this one. Definitely one of my favorites! :D
Holy hell, a perfect 5.0 after 125 ratings? Has that ever happened before?Incredible story, and I love the hints of more to come. Please, please continue writing.
This is how you write action, goddammit. I was really impressed with your theorycraft behind the mechanics of pegasus flight, even if a lot of it boiled down to "sky pony magic". ;)Most of all, though -- this story reads like an episode of FiM, and took me about as long as one to read through. Crisply paced, with the right amount of ebb and flow (literally with Brimstone Lake) to the setbacks and resurgences, and excellent worldbuilding, too. I'm incredibly jealous of your story's success.I regret that I can't include this as head-canon, being a writer with my own ideas--but were I not so... Thank you, and congratulations on writing a wonderful story.
@CouchCrusaderWow, thanks! And, yeah, the 'logistics-of-flight vs. just-plain-old-undefinable-sky-pony-magic' is an interesting conundrum to balance out in a world of Pinkie Pie reality-bending. I figured some things just need to be left undefined.I'm glad it entertained... that's what I set out to do. (I wish it paid MY bills, though, and not just Sethisto's ;P)As for this story's success, I definitely give credit the pre-readers. They gave some great feedback and I'm glad I listened.I'll try to find something of yours to read your ideas, too.
Aww. It's not solid 5 star anymore.The 142nd or 143rd rater ruined it... oh well...
@DPV111My soul died a little when I noticed this.
An incredible read, with some of the best action I've read in any fan fiction. This offers detailed and interesting offerings of ideas into the theory of pegasus ponies biology and magic, as well as newly created locations of Equestria. Combine that with a compelling, original and brilliantly well written plot, you get one hell of a good read.****** 6 stars says me :)