[Shipping]
Author: no space
Description: Ditzy Doo is a simple mail mare who often has trouble expressing herself, and she has long given up on the possibility of relationships beyond the few she has already forged. But with some help from her friend, she may be able to overcome those doubts.
Get Along Home
Additional Tags: Aphasia, Dating, Self-Doubt, Friendship, Decisions
105 comments:
FIRST!
Judging by the pic, this should be heartwarming. I could do with some heartwarming.
i agree with coffee dude.
Derpy shipping, havent seen much of this really. Not super fond of shipping stories but i might give this a read, if only becuase its derpy.
dat image is givin me diabeetus.
guess I gotta read this one :D
Derpy shipping? I'm gonna have to read this, aren't I?
...Yeah, I am.
Who can resist a good story, especially with a cute D'awwpy pic like that
Derpy and the Doc? I hope...
So DerpyxMacintosh
hmm...
I like the story overall. Derpy is quirky without being stupid and the story is sweet without giving me diabetes.
It seems like the first part though, to a slightly longer story. As a standalone the ending is... a little off
Hmm i don't think this shipping pair works well. Also i didn't like the aphasia, seemed very unnecessary and it was really distracting.
D'aaw, that was cute. Need more stuff like this.
I prefer DerpyDoc and Fluttermac.
@ToonNinja
Although it's not perfect, I'll admit. Feels like there's more to it than just this story.
That was pretty adorable. The ending was too sudden, though. More on the amputated end of the amputated to subtle scale.
Well, I thought the ending was very nice. This was an extremely cute story!
The GREAT and POWERFUL Trevor wonders if this was a short story, or if there will be more chapters. The G&P Trevor thinks that it should be a good story, though feels that Mac's speech is too forced. His accent wasn't THAT bad in episode four! Here, it seems... Taken to the point of rediculousness. Maybe that's done on purpose to give them more in common with their speech abnormalcies, but it's just too much. The GREAT and POWERFUL Trevor has now spoken his piece, and shall now depart in search of more stories to read. Goodbye, powerless peasants!
*Magically disappears to the next story*
"who often has trouble expressing herself, and she has long given up on the possibility of relationships beyond the few she has already forged. But with some help from her friend, she may be able to overcome those doubts."
That seem great.
I'm Gonna read That.
Then isn't it a Good idea to teach some people about "how to express themselves" ?
Thanks for Sharing Cereal.
I appreciate that this is finally posted a fic that wasn't grimdark or sad but this one didn't seem to work, neither the shipping, nor the aphasia. The ending seemed off as well.
I don't always read shipping, but when I do, its..
Derpy Mac? Big Doo?
I'll go with Derpy Mac.
I kinda like this depiction of Ditzy Doo. The aphasia's a little hard to follow at first, but it grew on me.
A sweet little story. It warms my heart.
That was rather sweet.
That cover art's no good fer my diabeetus.
Love being early to read new stories, will post a review when I'm done.
Excellent pairing, heartwarming story. Very sweet and simple, nice depictions of all the characters involved.
I'm going to have to submit a tear-jerker post season pony post after reading this?
/)v_v(\
D'awwwww.
first off, D'awwww
second off, this is an interesting take on Ditzy. I like the interesting takes. :3
good story.
AHHHHHH I LOVE IT AAAAAHHHH
1.hngggggggg-
2.HNGGGGGGGGgGGG-
3. Love derpymac ^^
I didn't find this nearly as diabeetus inducing as others it seems. I just didn't like how ditzy was written, tbh it is mostly the aphasia, seems to be out of no where for this character and seems to contribute nothing other than to make ditzy seem more silly/dumb, and to give reason for her not to want to be in a relationship, cause i guess being a derpy eyed single mother isn't enough of a reason. I also don't feel like derpy/mac is a good match, seems forced.
If the aphasia wasn't there i would have liked this a lot more.
More chaps please!!
First off, I want to thank everyone very much for the feedback, I always love to hear what people like and didn't like about my stories.
I said this in the Ponychan thread, and I'll say it here: This is how I've always viewed Ditzy, long before I ever got the idea to write this, and I realize it probably doesn't match up with a lot of people's views on her. The way she was written was my head-canon, and it wasn't just done for the purposes of this story or anything.
Big Mac's accent is another thing I was worried about: I'm normally not a big fan of dialect like this, but I did feel it was necessary for this story. I'm afraid it's hard to do without occasionally seeming like it's going overboard, and I tried to dial it down as well as I could while keeping the impact, but that's not something I've worked with very much.
Also, I know the ending was kind of abrupt, but I wanted a clean break. I had other scenes planned out to go after this, but I felt like if I extended it, it would just turn into mushy fluff, which wasn't the point of the story. To be honest, I tried to make the shipping secondary to the plot, more of a means than an end. Probably didn't do very well at that, though.
I highly doubt there will be any continuation, because I've already moved on to other projects, so I'm sorry to disappoint anyone who may have wanted more.
I feel I can't really address people's dislike of this particular ship, because I know a lot of people hold rather strongly to their favorites. Still, while I can understand how some people might see this as an unlikely pairing, I don't find it any more unlikely than pretty much any other potential Ditzy ship, and many other Big Mac ones, as well. 'Course, that may just be me.
Also, sorry if the image was misleading. I didn't exactly intend for this to be a d'aww fic, that picture is just what inspired me to write the story in the first place.
I... think that's everything, for now. Anyway, thanks so much again for reading and leaving any feedback at all.
This story was spot-on. The way it was written adds a nice portrayl of Ditzy/Derpy that does not demean the spirit of the character and adds a nice element of awesome. Again, The author has taken license and used it well.
Very nice, I especially liked big Mac.
Must... get help... picture... too... cute... *collapse*
Nooooo..... story.... even MORE dawwable.... darkness closing in... light at end of tunnel....*expires*
That. Was lovely.
This, I like; granted, the word salad we were served was a tetch hard to follow at first but at least the author did better at portraying it than Lynn "I know Charles Schulz" Johnston of For Better or For Worse fame. At no point did I worry that she was about to say 'Boxcar!!"
Just picturing the scene with Big Mac talking to Dinky... I think my heart just turned to raspberry syrup.
@no space
That was cute, really. Well written, short and sweet. I liked it. I will always love how the fandom creates such elaborate backstory for background characters that have like, 8 seconds to 2 minutes of silent screen time total.
but... (and this is not directed at you author)
For the love of all things pony, why, oh WHY does DItzy always have to have SOME kinda mental issue! I mean come on! Other than her derpy eyes, why does she have to have mental handicaps as well? Just once, I'd like to read a fic that doesn't have the pony that the fandom practically willed into existence because of an animation error afflicted with some manner of mental thing.
I would love to read one where someone bothered to develop the character just a little. Like, have her actually talk normally! just once? that Life with Derpy fic came close but was kinda sparse.
Otherwise. cute fic. Good job author. I smell a series.
Awwwwwwwwwwwwww!
This just fulfilled my sweetness intake for the night.
The part where Carrot calls her stupid and Dinky fought back was of true excellence. You have 5-Stars from me.
that was a really good depiction of both derpy-- d'oh! damnit, i mean Ditzy - and Macintosh, they seem very cute together :]
wish the ending wasn't so abrupt though, and i somewhat wish i could have read Der -- Ditzy's letter too
overall, very nice
@Anonymous
I second this opinion. I think derpy without aphasia would work a lot better.
I will never look at Ditzy Doo in the same way again! Her stammering, hard to understand dialogue took me very off guard, but within the first few lines I just kinda fell in love with it. It fit's her so well, and really brings the character to life.
And her's and Dinky's relationship was so sweet, and it was just...just perfect. Even with her speech and crazy eyes she is such a faithful and doting mother. You can really feel she just loves Dinky with every fiber of her very being.
And Big Mac, oh Big Mac was done wonderfully. His understanding and willingness to look right past Dinky's defects and seeing her as she truly is. A sweet, shy and very caring mare who is just looking for someone to love her for her.
I'm not a fan of shipping stories, they are usually done poorly and full of a bunch of mindless fluff. And 9 times out of 10 are pairings that just make NO sense (Sorry Twixie shippers...just no, I still love ya though!) But this was done the way a shipping SHOULD be done. I don't think I can see these two Ponies with anyone else now, they just...they just work together!
Great job author, if I didn't know any better I would say this is cannon!
Lost my wi-fi signal and couldn't comment as soon as I was done, but better late than never.
1: It's Derpy Mac! Woohoo!
2: Big Mac's speech seemed just a tad bit contrived. Even if he does only have about two lines in the whole first season, these conversations don't seem to match up with his persona.
3: Ditzy is basically a clean slate for a character, and I like what you did with her here. Good job on that front.
4: Almost no punctuation, grammar, or capitalization errors beyond what was necessary to convey the characters' modes of speech. Excellent!
Conclusion? Not the best story I've ever read by far, but very original and entertaining with few distracting editing mistakes.
7/10.
I REALLY hope there is a part 2 at some point. That was beautiful.
Hate shipping with the burning flames of a thousand suns. That image made me really want to read this.
@Anonymous
This was really good.
Stories like this should really be made into a REAL book so that one can enjoy this whereevr one goes no need tell you the rating (10/10)
A beautiful short story. Ditzy's speech was a nice touch that really added to the story in my opinion. I loved that my favourite stallion was included, and proved to be such a gentlepony. Although others have said the ending was a tad abrupt, I felt it came at the right time- Five stars from me.
Ya know, this is actually a very good pairing now that I've thought about it... The ending might have seemed been a little sudden, but hey, it's a short story and you got the point across without turning it into fluff. I think maybe after a story like that, readers were probably just expecting/wanting more. Very well done. You've gotta be a good writer to pull off the aphasia thing in such an understandable and, dare I say, cute a way as you did. I honestly wasn't expecting much when I started reading, but I finished with a warmed-heart smile on my face... So thank you, I needed that. :3
Nice fic, I liked it. The characters seemed pretty solid, especially the relationship between Ditzy and Dinky, but it was managed without being sickeningly sweet. I will echo earlier comments on the ending, but personally I reckon it feels abrupt purely because I was left wanting more rather than it being poorly written. All in all, a well written fic on a shipping I'd never have thought of that deserves a sequel (hint hint)
If this is not a "classic" of the MLP fanfic world, then I imagine it's the step just below that.
Great work here, despite the few spelling/grammar issues :D
I thought this story was adorable. Ditzy is such a sweet pony. <3
And Big Mac was his patient, understanding self.
I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my favorite Derpy story on Equestria Daily.
She started making sense at "estivation". Now, I have to re-read, and see if I can decifer the rest of it.
I actually did try to keep the meaning of what she was saying from getting too buried, and in the few points when her speech was completely off, I tried to at least convey the meaning through her tone and body language. Otherwise, it's mostly just a lot of synonyms and near-synonyms and things.
As always, I read through it several times as I was writing, and several more after I finished, but apparently a few grammar and spelling mistakes slipped through, so I'm sorry about that.
And, again, don't hold your breath for a part 2. Or even begin to possibly consider hoping for one, because... it is the furthest thing from likely. A story this long is reeeeeally unlike me, a sequel even more so, and I've done what I wanted with these characters. I'm extremely flattered that so many of you seem to want one, though.
Thank you all again for the feedback. It makes me more happy than you can imagine that people enjoy this little thing I did, or at least gave it a shot if they didn't.
It was so beautiful. I damn nearly cried. (Okey, I actually cried a bit, but don't tell anyone)
That was too good. Not only was it a shipping I had not come across before, but it was written well and such a touching story. I love Derpy's way of talking, too!
Both the picture and the fic itself is pure d'awww. I'm really hoping for a sequel.
Dear Celestia, Diabetes and heart attack at once....so good.....
If Ditzy had to have a mental condition to go with her eyes, aphasia would be the only one I'd go for. It worked perfectly. It's also nice to see the country slurs and attitude in Big Mac (it's probably easier for me to understand him cause I speak nearly the same way).
I... have not been so touched in... such a long time that I can't even vaguely recall the previous time...
I think I cried at least five times before I finished. You know, those slow tears when something just gets you? A lot of that with one just... I don't know... fit of drawn out, choked, sobs.
It was remarkabley well written and probably just the right length. As with others, my only issue was probably the ending. It was a bit abrupt, though I don't quite know what could have been done to change it. In retrospect, upon rereading that very ending, it does work rather well. I suppose it may have just been hoping for more of a great thing on all our parts.
In truth this was the first piece of MLP fiction I've picked up and I do not think I could have made a better choice. Bravo, good wordsmith, bravo.
It was very sweet, I found myself Dawwing like nothing else, especially the bits involving dinky.
The aphasia was a little hammed, but it did add to the story, giving Derpy (I insist on calling her that) a reason to be so shy. I thought your characterisation was very strong, if the ending was a little abrupt. Overall, excellent work!
Oh yeah, John Freeman Approved.
Ending was kind of sudden, but everything else about it was pretty great.
even if this was just supposed to be a one shot, the ending was too sudden.. a lot of loose ends.
Such a sweet story. Ending could have been a little longer though.
Ah, man, its been so long since a nice heart-warming shipping story. This was truly a joy to read. I don't care that much for incomprehensible Derpy. At times you definitely go somewhat into that direction, but you seem to walk a fine line and for every line of dialogue by Derpy I did not care for there was one that was utterly adorable. Regardless, that's personal taste anyway.
I don't mind the ending. It did make me wonder if there was gonna be a second chapter, but I see the complete tag so I guess not. But the story doesn't really need it. I guess it ends a bit abrupt, but at the same time it feels as a god a point to end it as any.
Ditzy sort of...the way she spoke, her speech patterns mimicked one River Tam (of "Firefly" fame) when she was going off on her own little cryptic tangents.
In any case, that should explain why I kept hearing Summer Glau's voice for Ditzy. I mean, it just made the perfect fit for me.
Regardless, you've made me grin and given me type 2 diabetes. Job done, sir.
This had me laughing a few times through so I recommend it. For a one-stop ship fic it turned out pretty decent. 4/5 for good quality shipping.
Exquisite document of interest! Pairing of two delightful, vocabulary diverse, character captured. Mare's language particularly exciting and cute. Expectant of more text.
I probably failed at Derp Speak. XP
This story had pure beauty in it! And even though some say it ended too soon, I say it ended just right :)
Derpy shipping~!
Sweet, but not too sweet. One of the shipping fics, that I'm proud to say I've read.
This is simply adorable. A match made in pony heaven. 5 stars, if not 6. Could there be more chapters in the future? It would be a hoot if Ditzy is invited to the Apple's next family reunion. That, and Big Mac seeing Ditzy's family. That is with a little help from Twilight and her cloud walking spell. Maybe even have Big Mac propose to Ditzy.
Oh this is positively heart-meltingly touching. <3 A perfect short story to bring a smile to one's face. Nicely done! :3
Very cute story. The pic sold me on reading this one, and after reading I can't wait for more! (If more is to come!)
Too much sweet, Need something savory now :o
Ironically, given her problems speaking, it's with this story that she really seemed to find her voice, for me.
Lovely story. But it needs a sequel. Even if it's just Mac formally introducing Ditzy to the others.
Though.... I would like to see more of Ditzy's history. Seems Dinky's father was a real jerk.
Well, poo. You gotta good story here. And I love Ditzy's interactions with Dinky. If you ever do find the time, a continuation would be great!
Oh my goodness this is adorable. Moar plz?
Absolutely awesome job....
I gotta say I didnt think it would impress me so much.Keep it up please.
Derpy's cute as heck in this. I do so love her with word salad, and I love every time she says "Nope", for some reason. But I saw 'aphasia' in the tags and knew I had to read this.
Big Mac's definitely way over-accented, though. He's an interesting choice to ship with Derpy, at least.
Carrot's such a good friend. Her characterization is half the reason this piece is working so well. (The other half being Ditzy.) I love that she seems to understand everything being said to her. Also, Big Mac good with kids: makes so much sense.
Five full stars of d'awwwwww.
Derpy shipping? I had to see that. Oh boy, I'm glad I did.
It was so cute and tragic at the beginning, I almost cried at how hard Ditzy was berating herself ;-;
But then, like a salve, it came the crowning moments of heartwarming with Dinky and Carrot. Derpy is the best mom ever, and the dress scene, HNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG!!!!
And it ended in a sweet tone. Mac is THE gentlecolt. 5/5
I absolutely adored this story. It made me like Derpy even more, if that is possible. Please keep it up and write some more chapters! I love your style of writing, but maybe you could eventually have Derpy become better at speech because of Big Mac, either that or have her become self-confident a bit more. Still, keep up the good work!
I give it 6 STARS! Good Job!
You know... Carrot Top in that pic reminds me of Jose the Parrot.
I like how it ended with "silence" followed by a blank page, whether or not that was done on purpose. I also thought the whole story was quite heartwarming and I liked this interpretation to Ditzy's character. Their connection felt genuine since they both share similar issues and feelings, especially when Big Mac found out that Ditzy was a mother. Dinky probably reminded him of Apple bloom in the way he saw that Ditzy cared for her. Overall it was very well written. It was short and sweet, which is something I need between all these sad stories I keep reading.
And that's how DerpyMac became my official ship. Excellent work!
I kinda want to see a sequel. 6 Stars!
cute
Well, it was a pretty good and enjoyable read.
It's interesting to see that, here, she's aware of her 'speech impediment', and that she's often going for small words or short sentences.
Many authors, when using her 'speech trouble', often have her go on big sentences as if she wasn't really 'councious' of this 'trouble'.
But, there's one(1) little thing, in the way it was used here, that doesn't sound quite right :
>The language wasn’t perfect, and he had to read over some parts multiple times to glean the meaning from what she had written, but it actually was more comprehensible than her usual speech
-Ditzy only has a 'speech impediment'', this does not include a WRITTING ''impediment'' too !
That detail out of the way, it was good to see Ditzy and Dinky happy :) ...and maybe a future 'even happier' Ditzy.
Perhaps its just the fact that this isn't the first story I've read that portrayed Derpy or Macintosh this way (in fact, I don't think I've ever read one where Derpy didn't have a similar speech impairment, so I'm kinda curious where this sentiment is coming from, actually), but I really liked how everyone was portrayed in this.
Macintosh was about perfect, Derpy was written in a way that was understandable with some thought but didn't belie her condition (which is something that a lot of authors struggle with when they portray her this way, I've noticed), and it was sweet without overdoing it.
My only real problem (aside from no sequel) is that the ending was a bit blunt. That's not a problem by itself, and with a few minor changes it would have worked fine, but as it was it just kind of ended. It actually caught me off guard, as I was reading along and suddenly there was no more story left.
I suppose I wasn't expecting this particular ship, and I have others I usually prefer, but this was good enough to let me ignore that and just enjoy it. I feel the end was a bit sudden as well, but again, I can set that aside. Very good overall!
I hope this gets a 5-6 star. It sure has my vote.
I like that Ditzy wasn't shown as dumb just different, in fact it seems like she was quite smart. Very good.
Absolutely adorable...I loved this! A unique pairing and, IMO, true to the characters. Well, Big Mac anyway since "Derpy" is very tangential. You did a fantastic job creating her personality and quirks, instead of being "stupid" she just has some communication issues to compliment the eye issue. And Big Mac was so kind and patient...
MOAR DAMN YOU, MOAR!
Words have trouble expressing my love and adoration for this fic, for multiple reasons.
I read this a while ago and I just had the sudden urge to look at it again. I really loved it. It was insanely sweet. Even though I would prefer Dinky be a little sister I can still appreciate the whole mother/daughter love thing. I also love how Derpy/Ditzy's character ranges so much. From full on retarded Derpy to speech-impediment Derpy with crazy eyes. This isn't one of my favorite ships but that doesn't change it's adorableness one bit.
Trevor just had to read this story again! One also inquires if there will be more to this story or not. Trevor would LOVE to see a sequel or epilogue or something more, if the author has any ideas!
~ Magical Trevor, Minstrel of Equestria
if this was a book i would read it, I know you, the author has posted a denial of a continuation,for the sake of other authors, would you be willing to let them continue it, so long as they followed the format, and ran drafts past you?
I am NOT volunteering, but there are probably waiting for the chance
I'm not going to tell anyone they can't write a continuation if they want to, but I doubt anyone will want to.
I have to be honest, I recently toyed with the idea of a follow-up to this, but it went nowhere fast. Sorry. Still, I am glad that people are still finding this and reading it even so long after it came out, since I do try to check up on my stories every now and then just to see if there's any new feedback or questions.
I read this and it made me happy.
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