• Story: Pink Ladies and Sour Apples

    [Shipping][Normal][Sad] MacXocponyguy for those of you who want that stuff!

    Author: Harp's'ong
    Description: Big Macintosh has been married to the farm his whole life, so it stands to reasoning that he never had time to spare for a mare. But when Applebuck Season arrives and Applejack's friends can't help, the Apple family is faced with a dilemma of deeper concerns. However, when Applejack recruits a few hired hands the answer to both problems appears.
    Google Documents
    Pink Ladies and Sour Apples Part 1
    Pink Ladies and Sour Apples Part 2

    Deviant Art
    Pink Ladies and Sour Apples Part 1
    Pink Ladies and Sour Apples Part 2

    Additional Tags: Sweet Humorous Self-discovery Denial Acceptance

    36 comments:

    1. This aughta-

      Wait

      oughta? outa? auhta? ahta?

      ....

      This will be good

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    2. Twitchy tail...


      Incoming Sh*tstorm

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    3. If you don't want to read M/M ponies, don't read this!

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    4. What? M/M? In a fandom with lesbians as part of its foundation? That's pretty brave.

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    5. Well-written story, though I would have liked to see a more definitive conclusion. However, I suppose such an internal struggle like that would take more time that the current story covers.

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    6. Well, I read chapter one (have to leave soon) and I'm liking how long the chapters are, and how slowly this is going. Keep it up!

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    7. I think some M/M is very refreshing in this fandom, given that it is predominantly F/F. Especially since they aren't clopfics.

      I found this a joy to read.

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    8. @Anonymous

      You obviously haven't read the one by Roy G. Biv.

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    9. Gah, I've got a feeling a lot of people read the opening tags, etc. and instantly drew negative conclusions. Said OC pony is supposed to be a literary tool, mostly used as symbolism (especially in the second part). The second part is also supposed to be the most important, the focus of this story revolves around themes of homosexual identity and the different views of homosexuality as seen through the mane six (excepting RD). It also addresses the overwhelming commitment of the Brony community to ship mares on mares but mostly ignore the other side of the hoof, in fact that idea inspired the story.

      However, the second part wasn't read by any pre-readers, I believe, so the assumption was made that this story was completely about shipping.

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    10. Dave Mustang, the cynical BronyJuly 11, 2011 at 1:15 PM

      According to these fanfics, every other pony in Equestria is gay. Wouldn't the population of ponies be constantly dwindling then?

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    11. @Dave Mustang, the cynical Brony
      ...None of the Mane six are gay, in fact there are only five character listed as such... Lyra, Bon-Bon, Big Mac, Delph, and Scootaloo.

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    12. Dave Mustang (AKA the clophater)July 11, 2011 at 1:25 PM

      @J.Harper
      Umm, where does this come from? And in kids shows, nobody is gay, cause companies don't like that.

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    13. @Dave Mustang (AKA the clophater)

      He means in the story, not the official show. And who knows, maybe Hasbro will get brave and tackle some controversial issues in season 2! Probably not, but one can hope.

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    14. Certainly aren't a lot of stories about gay male pony characters, I was almost certain I'd never find any. Almost passed this one up because I thought it was another Big Mac M/F shipping or something. Haha

      I wouldn't mind seeing a few more M/M shipfics out there.

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    15. Yeah, I agree that this isn't really a shipfic at all. At least not for the first two chapters.

      I've read too many self-discovery/internal conflict and coming out stories to be impressed by that aspect alone, and I've personally never really liked Big Macintosh's character at all, so I think I'll have to abstain from rating, sorry.

      The fact that people have such issues with gays in this fandom is alarming, though. Thankfully they haven't shown up in these comments yet, though. After all, this is no different from the dozens of other fics which use ponies to tell a different kind of story. Black and White, for example, was a real-world self-insert lesbian fic and yet people had no problem with that.

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    16. @Lupus Albus

      Hm? I wasn't aware there were many people who had problems with it. I haven't witnessed anything like that yet.

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    17. Dave Mustang, the cynical BronyJuly 11, 2011 at 2:07 PM

      @Anonymous
      Seriously? You honestly thing there's a slim chance they'd do that? As much as people like to deny it, this show was made to sell toys. Hasbro wouldn't want to hurt sales just to make a social statement that would please it's fanboys.

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    18. @Lupus Albus That's fine. And as for people who dislike gayness in the fandom, the story was inspired to see their reaction and those of bronies who don't mind/like f/f shipping but avoid m/m shipping.

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    19. @Dave Mustang, the cynical BronyActually, it's my greatest fear that the show would move in that direction because it's largest market would become it's fanboys. I don't think they would ever tackle an issue like this, unless it was done obliquely, like how Feeling Pinkie Keen dances around issues of belief and disbelief (or religion and atheism)

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    20. @J.Harper

      I wonder if Dave Polsky would get that one. He wrote both FPK and Over a Barrel; two episodes which dealt with belief issues and the settler/Indian history respectively.

      As for this fic, it's the 2nd M/M fic in this fandom I've read (the other being a Braeburn/Soarin' one) and it's a good change of pace. Not to mention a decent fanfic.

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    21. @J.Harper Feeling Pinkie Keen was supposed to be more about trusting your friends and their intuition and keeping an open mind about things you don't understand (see: Twilight being adamant on 'disproving' the phenomenon rather than actually testing it in fair circumstances).

      No religious connotations were intended or even considered, and Lauren Faust was extremely disappointed when she realized they had screwed up on the message of the episode.

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    22. that was a nicely written fic, though I don't think the [Shipping] tag is necessary here. I mean, nopony is actually getting shipped here

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    23. @Dave Mustang, the cynical Brony

      Do I honestly think there's a slim chance they'd do that? Hell no.

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    24. I have *not* read that many self-discovery fics, so I gave it a 5. Really liked it, although I desperately wants a third chapter thats all happy endings for Big Macintosh and Delph. I only saw one grammar error, and you handled the actual prose well, I thought.

      But the best part was when the mane six projected their stereotypes onto poor Big Mac.

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    25. Agreed. A third chapter/epilogue would be very much appreciated.

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    26. This story hurt to read in a good way. It needs a sad label though.

      That is of course assuming there isn't an uplifting third chapter where the mane six stop being monsters. Seriously, I want to say that the cruelty an stupidity they displayed was uncharacteristic of such intelligent, caring ponies, but people have proved me wrong there far too often.

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    27. @Chanticleer
      I actually felt that if you took the ponies out of the show and dropped their personalities into real life in this kind've context that's how each one would behave. I expected a shitstorm over how Fluttershy disapproves, but I think Rarity is the one who is the biggest bigot of them all with how she perpetuates stereotypes.

      As for an epilogue, I planned on collecting this story and publishing it for ebooks (for free, of course) and adding an extended ending featuring RD. It wouldn’t tie up any loose ends, just give RD’s perspective. This would allow me to segue into my next fic about her joining the Wonderbolts. The conflict would be between pursuing her dreams and keeping her friends (because being a Wonderbolt is so rigorous it's impossible for her to find a balance). Not the most original premise, but I've already got a killer opening for it and its already referenced in PL and SA, so I'm doing it anyway. There’s a whole slew of interconnected stories I want to do for each character that kind’ve challenges what they are (RD’s loyalty to her friends vs her dreams, for example), and while each one would be standalone it will reference the events in previous stories. So while this one is over, there might be a reference in background about what happened between Big Mac and Delph.

      The only way I'd write an actual part three is if someone commissioned me to, and I'd probably just send it their way and not post it anywhere unless they asked me to. I want to leave the ending open and ambiguous so if readers want they can pursue their own imaginings of what happened next. All of my stories will kind of pursue that same end.

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    28. @J.Harper

      Rarity was a bigot here alright, but at least she was trying to help in her own ham handed way. The real person who I thought was almost uncharacteristically bad was Apple Jack. It makes sense for her to have a nasty upbringing about this sort of stuff, but I was really hoping for a scene at the end there where she got Mac's note and got horribly worried for him. She's definitely the kind to go out on a limb for her friends and family.

      Eh, but this is a forum, not a writer's workshop and you did a genuinely good job. I'll try to keep the second guessing to a minimum.

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    29. I liked it, and I'm not a fan of tortured coming out fics. Thought the female:male pony ratio bit was particularly clever, and Rarity automatically thinking of Mac as fab was hilarious. Sadly happens way too often, haha. Hope you continue on with this, and that Mac accepting himself isn't the grand conclusion.

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    30. @Chanticleer
      AJ does accept him, eventually, just at first there's a deep sense of disappointment, partly because Big Mac lied to her and himself.

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    31. @J.Harper

      So wait, is this the last chapter, or is there going to be another one? There seems to be a lot of loose ends so I'm assuming it's not over just yet, but that ending seemed a little ambiguous, so...

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    32. @Anonymous
      I can already say that the next story I'm working on ties up some of the loose ends through references to this story (though both can be read without the other and be understood perfectly). I did make the ending ambiguous on purpose, and I probably won't ever say whether or not Big Macintosh finds somepony or if him and Delph get together. But he does mend his relationships with family and accepts who he is.

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    33. I really enjoyed this piece - in a fandom that's heavy on mare x mare relationships it's refreshing and interesting to see someone trying something different.

      (Minor spoilers ahead:)
      There were a few things I thought were weak elements in the story - the premise of being unable to harvest the farm without help seemed somewhat unfounded, since the only reason it was a problem in Applebuck Season was because Big Mac was hurt and couldn't help. Also, AJ not asking Rarity for help because she'd want to use magic and later the comment that magic was bad for the trees seemed a bit out of place, since we saw magic being used to help with the harvest at the end of Applebuck Season. Finally, it felt strange to me that lesbian relationships were openly accepted and considered fairly normal, yet a major concern held by more than one character about Mac being gay was that he wouldn't have any kids.

      These are all kind of nitpick-y things though - overall the story was well-written and a good read. I especially like the head-on handling of the disproportionate number of mares to stallions, and thought that using this as justification for lesbian relationships being normal while gay ones were taboo was an interesting idea.

      Here's looking forward to your next story!

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    34. @Twix
      I don't mind nit-picking, and to be fair, when I wrote the idea of Applejack not finding magic natural I knew that minor scene in Applebuck Season would undermine it, but I counted on most bronies being reminded rather of Winter Wrap Up and AJ's suspicion towards Twilight helping with the plows.

      As for the lesbian relationships being accepted and normal, it's to reflect how common and accepted mare on mare shipping is in the brony community. And the main issue with Big Mac not having foals was the farm (by the assumption he's the eldest in line) goes to him when Granny Smith passes, and he and his children would be the only surefire way for the farm to remain under the Apple name.

      I can't really raise a defense against your first point. I twisted the canon's ankle for that one. You got me there :P

      If I get a prompt response from the site this time the next link to my next story will be on here Monday, but Sunday I will have it up on DA, Google Docs, and FiMfiction. Just search for the title At the Heart of the Rainboom.

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