Description: Octavia's imagination gets the better of her as she listens to a startling musical concert.
Octavia and grimdark?My interest is piqued.
Interesting. It even has a Youtube link to the music that the band is playing in the story.
Octavia's imagination is the source of the Grimdark yet what exactly is going on remains ti me a mystery.
Spooky and atmospheric. Well done.
VERY well done. That certainly was horrifying, and I could see how that music could evoke that imagery.
I read too fast for the music :P It still was amazing being able to read the words and pull images from them and then hear the music and pull more inspiration from that! I can't wait for part two!!!
>"Complete"Does no one read tags?
Whoa, this was really interesting. Very, very well written. The music was perfect, though perhaps I read to fast for it...
This doesn't feel like a complete story...It feels like a DISTRUBING story!Yay!
Interesting to say the least. Too bad it's already complete i would've loved to see a second part accompanying the music.
0.0 i need new pants......
A very cool concept. I definitely want to check out more stuff by that composer. Reminds me of Penderecki.
well that was intense. Didn't think I'd be listening to an orchestra today while reading a fanfic.
D: WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK WAS THAT O_o;
The combination of Octavia and grimdark got my attention, but... I have no idea what was going on in this. And I finished reading with 4 minutes left in the piece. It didn't seem to line up with anything at all.The writing in this needs some tightening: lots of repetition, some tense and wording issues. The 'dream' scene was nicely visceral, at least; I just kind of didn't see the point of this. Maybe I just missed whatever was in the song that struck you and Octavia.
Oh WOW.....I mean, that's just.....AMAZING.....
It was a NIGHTMARE!The creeeeeepy thing?The music ended RIGHT when i've finished reading it...O_OI need more like this!
That's okay I didn't want to sleep anyway...But seriously I enjoyed this very nice work.
Octavia is the best BG pony. Just sayin'I think the music went very well with the story. This was a fun little piece!
An absolutely brilliant fanfic! The music went very well with it!5/5 stars.
loved this piece. could have used a bit more exposition to get her to the theater. also i see why you put the "reawakenings" in the dream piece and i dont think you should change. just want to say they kind of broke the flow of the dream piece.however i could put myself there and i hope to read more pieces like this from you
The car is on fire, and there's no driver at the wheel, and the sewers are all muddied with a thousand lonely suicides, and a dark wind blows. The government is corrupt, and we're on so many drugs with the radio on and the curtains drawn.We're trapped in the belly of this horrible machine and the machine is bleeding to death.The sun has fallen down, and the billboards are all leering, and the flags are all dead at the top of their poles. It went like this: The buildings tumbled in on themselves, mothers clutching babies, picked through the rubble, and pulled out their hair. The skyline was beautiful on fire. All twisted metal stretching upwards, everything washed in a thin orange haze. I said, "Kiss me, you're beautiful - these are truly the last days." You grabbed my hand, and we fell into it like a daydream or a fever. We woke up one morning and fell a little further down. For sure it's the valley of death.I open up my wallet, and it's full of blood.
That was really good, the music went really well with it and really added to the atmosphere.I thought the sensitive skin thing was a little over the top but in crazy dream land nothing has to make sense.
I couldn't get into it. It feels like it's trying to be something 'artistic' yet lacking some spirit or drive true art has. And I'm not even talking about the writing yet, just the music.It took me a good five minutes to realize they had started the actual piece and I wasn't listening to an extended tuning session. Mein Gott. On to the work itself.Yeah, not so much no. I can see where you're going with this and if you can really get into this, eh, 'music' then you'll probably be moved to a height I cannot fathom. But because I hear dissonant noise and not a proper piece, it didn't affect me half as much as it probably should have.SPOILERS AHOY.The 'dream sequence' was nice and jarring, especially as Octavia kept waking up during the performance and dragged us along with her but the whole reason, it's lost to me. Why was she having such dreams? Was it solely the music's fault? Why did she dream of the fall of Rainbow Dash? Why would it have such an effect on her dream-form? I suppose the 'skin' thing was some form of emotional trauma represented by dream-physical wounds but WHY was she so traumatized? I just really don't get it.Maybe it would help if I had some emotional investment in the music or in the story but as it stands, ... it reads well but seems to lack purpose. It lacks something to really tell me. Maybe that's it, I seek something this work isn't able and never was meant to give. It's probably a problem on my end.I'd give it a 3/5 but since it's really not my cup of tea, I'm going to not rate it at all. I'll let those with investment do that.
I've only made it through about half of chapter two, but in the past day I've really come to love Octavia, especially yours. Anypony else who likes Tavy should try listening to classical music while reading fics. It makes it an even more enjoyable experience.Please keep writing!
JESUS CHRIST WHAT THE FUCKthat was awesome.
A very gut wrenching work. I can see it and hear it. I can only hope that the performers would continue after with something uplifting or they may leave their fans in tears, unable to lift a hoof to applaud their performance.
Fluttershy=TreeScootaloo=ChickenRainbow Dash=FRICKIN' ATOM BOMB!Ok, maybe not atom bomb, but dang, that was destructive. Music had me on edge the whole time, which was good, because so was Octavia. Its like I could see it all happening!
Hello everyone and thanks for the feedback!The story behind this piece is, well, it was a spur of the moment type of thing. I'm a musician by trade and I've been studying this score for about a month. A friend of mine was writing his own fanfic and it inspired me for a good few hours. Then, apparently, my friends liked it and said I should submit...so I did!I honestly wasn't expecting it to be liked! I wasn't planning on a part 2, as I thought you'd want to think up your own interpretation. That and there's a static burst at the end of part 2 that makes me jump every time!And syncing the text to the music to fit with everyone's reading speed was difficult...:P So obviously, I can't cater for everyone in that regard.If I write another story of some kind, I'll promise to put more thought into it!Thanks everyone!Dr Dissonance
Okay, stuff. I have quite a bit to say about this piece.Comments:*A very good read, all around.*I would love to see a video (or some type of multimedia presentation, at least) of this that displays the words synched up to the music where they are supposed to be read. This isn't a huge issue, since neither the music nor the story really had any "events" that needed to be synched up, as far as I can tell. Apart from the explosion, of course, but I couldn't find a musical analogue for that event anyway.*The music was excellently creepy. DO NOT READ/LISTEN TO THIS LATE AT NIGHT. I mean really. Or do. It's actually kind of awesome when you do. It depends on you.Criticisms:*The ending was a tad abrupt. I want more. Even if you don't go into a sequel, a little extension would be nice.*The back-to-reality scenes almost broke the mood. It's a minor quibble, since it worked fine with them there, but I think doing away with one of them might have been good for the story. Even making the second breakaway a little shorter and a little more introspective/emotional (the old stallion asking if she's okay takes you a little too far out of Octavia's head, I think) might have helped. Alternately, using more, even smaller breakaways of single sentences of actions or feelings going on to Octavia personally within the hall. A tear rolling down her cheek at the same time her dream-self begins crying? I don't know, just some random brainstorming. Use it or not, keep it in mind or dismiss it as you see fit. It works either way.*I am slightly annoyed that fanon has decided Octavia plays the "cello". It's not your fault. It just bothers me as someone who knows instruments.And that's all I have to say. Excellent work overall.
This is creepy, cause a few years back when Korea was supposedly going to launch a dummy bomb on Hawaii (if anyone remembers that) the night it was supposed to happen I had a dream exactly like this, with classical music basically just like this playing in the dream. What's weirder is my friend was vacationing in Hawaii during that dream, and in my dream I was trying to find her, but couldn't.This stuff is so similar, it's giving me Deja vu... What's even weirder is all my Brony friends tell me constantly that I'm just like Octavia about all the other ponies. Man this is like... Oh god I can't explain this.
That was... terrifying. Music is by far the easiest way to hit me hard, with stories of high emotion being a close second. Combining these two worked perfectly, and my hair has been standing straight for a good 15 minutes now, even after the end of the story and song. So rare for a grimdark to not even have to tell you anything for it to be terrifying and repulsive, yet enthralling. Excellent job capturing the music in words.
Everyone is saying it was Rainbow Dash who fell, but if it was a white pegasus with those colors of hair, wouldn't it be Celestia?!?!?! Iunno, though. Great job btw.
Interesting concept that was written well and coordinated well. It's no surprise that this story was written by someone familiar with and engaged in music; it requires a musically-gifted mind to come up with such an idea. The writing ability here is perhaps only a little above average, but the concept and general execution of it as a combination of words and sound is excellent.My one problem with this story, however, is that it really isn't a MLP fanfic. You could replace the names of every MLP character and place in it with those of a different fictional setting, and the story would basically not change. It's a great idea, but not really a great Pony idea, if you follow my meaning. It's really just more of an original story. But it's a good one at that, and worth 4 Stars.
I very much liked this, but at first I thought there were going to be more songs- I would read chapters of this stuff! but I'd imagine syncing the music to the reading is somewhat of a challenge~ Still, I'd love to read more =)