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Author: Heliopause
Description: Twilight doesn't know what to do when a hastily cast spell causes Spike to disappearOut of Sight, Out of Mind
Additional Tags: Short, Episode style
Description: Twilight doesn't know what to do when a hastily cast spell causes Spike to disappearOut of Sight, Out of Mind
31 comments:
Now THAT I can picture as being an episode.
And Trollestia strikes again.
....................
I like it...
Oh Trollestia, you so funny.
I totally saw 'Spike ending up in Canterlot' coming. Also, stalker Pinkie!
The best fanfics are those that don't stray too far from canon, particularly the mood of the show itself.
This one's a keeper.
Trollestia strikes again!
Oh Trollestia, how we love thee
that was awesome! damn trollestia :/ 5 stars easily
That was brilliant. Should have been an episode.
I now love this fic. Descriptions? Awesome. Pace? Spectacular. Trollestia? Perfectly in canon.
5 stars easy indeed! Thanks for making me laugh!
Nicely done, and very episodic, indeed.
I would love to see an animation of RD vs. streamers. :P
This needs to be an episode. Somepony fund it!
It was an OK story, until Trollestia came along and made it 5-star material.
That was awesome. Twilight freaking out, epic Trollestia, Creepy Pie... it's got all the ingredients for pure win! Instant 5-star.
Huh, anypony else having weird symbols display in Google Docs? Weird glitch.
Anyways, super read. 5-stars.
We need more episode-style fics. I can totally imagine a episode like this being made.
(I really want to see Celestia prank Twilight like that in the show)
Lol, that's Trollestia we all know and love. We need more Trollestia and less tyrant.
This was pretty good, a nice fluffy episode-like story, up until the end, and then it became amazing. Oh, Trollestia. I am laughing for real right now!
Ya can't live for over a millennium without finding ways to have fun. If that means messing with the ones who worship you, more power to ya.
I agree with the anons. We need more nice Trollestia, less Tyrant-llestia.
Excellent prose, diction and narration. You totally encompassed the main casts' personalities. My mind's eye even lip synced some of the dialog.
Five stars.
"Did he explode?" Fucking LMAO XD
That ending was perfect.
This story had me smiling the whole time. I love these types of tales where Spike influences the events of the story.
The only thing that drew my attention is that despite Twilight's freak outs on her teacher she would still be more worried about what happened to her long time friend than what would happen to herself.
@Anonymous
That's a good point. I would say she was concerned for both herself and for Spike. What I tried to get across in the story was that the potential harm to Spike was so horrible, she didn't even want to think about it too hard.
Loved the ending. Absolutely priceless.
I'm really hoping this gets turned into an episode.
Trollestia, you sly bastard.
@Roxor, I know, right? That would be awesome!
Interesting, funny, believable... All the good stuff ;)
This is an old story, so I don't know if anyone will read this. Oh well.
I didn't read this until now, so I saw "Lesson Zero" first. Honestly, this feels more like a proper episode of FiM than Lesson Zero did. Both are about Twilight making a mistake, freaking out about what Celestia might do, and the problem being resolved when Celestia shows up. But "Out of Sight, Out of Mind" makes more sense to me. Twilight had a real reason to freak out rather than just being OCD to the extreme.
As for criticism...the title doesn't make much sense because once Spike is out of sight, he's on everypony's mind. Also it was a bit irksome how much the Lunar Festival being "the most important" was emphasized. It's a heartwarming idea that everypony had been celebrating the night while Luna had been gone, but the canon story says that everyone forgot about Luna. She was gone for 1000 years, after all.
But that's just nitpicking. Great story!
I get pinged whenever anyone comments here, so thanks!
It was strange seeing Lesson Zero, because yes, it's basically the same story with a few tweaks. I think Lesson Zero has a depth my fic lacks. In my fic, it's jsut Twilight freaking out. LZ adds in her friends' reactions, and there's actually a nice, deep lesson to be learned from that.
LZ also does two things that were really smart. First, if your main character is acting stupid, it's good to have other characters tell her she's being stupid. It forces her to justify and rationalize. I don't have that; in LZ she's got Spike and everypony harping on her, and I think it adds to the story.
LZ also has that great moment with Celestia descending from the sky, and you think for one brief moment "oh crap, she really IS in trouble!" And once you go there, you empathize with her a little more.
As for the title, it's supposed to be a pun. Spike went out of sight; Twilight went out of her mind.
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