Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Story: Better Living Through Science and Ponies

[Crossover] Epic length Portal crossover time? Why, I do believe that is in fact the case.  Hope you guys don't have plans this afternoon!

Author: Pen Stroke, Assisted By Batty Gloom
Description: GLaDOS is free of Chell, free to continue testing, when she discovers a portal gun Wheatley tried to repair with duck tape. When the portal gun catastrophically fails, the enrichment center, GLaDOS, and Chell are literally dropped in the middle of Equestria. The mute test subject soon finds the world of ponies far more welcoming than the human world. But GLaDOS sees possibilities. Let the testing begin... for science.
Better Living Through Science and Ponies Part 1
Better Living Through Science and Ponies Part 2
Better Living Through Science and Ponies Part 3
Better Living Through Science and Ponies Part 4
Better Living Through Science and Ponies Part 5
Better Living Through Science and Ponies Part 6
Better Living Through Science and Ponies Part 7
Better Living Through Science and Ponies Part 8
Better Living Through Science and Ponies Part 9
      
ALL chapters on Deviant Art

All Chapters on Fimfiction


Additional Tags: Thinking With Portals and Ponies, Chell, GLaDOS, Portal

[Crossover] Side Story

Author: Joe England
Description: This extra chapter fits best being read between parts 4 and 5 of the primary story.
Celestia vs GlaDOS

Additional Tags: side stuff!

309 comments:

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Homfrog said...

Just read it all. That was amazing!

Mush said...

Heh heh heh...

I have been waiting for this fanfic FOREVEEER!

Sethisto said...

yeesh you guys are fast.

Once i finish digging through these emails I am totally diving in.

Mush's HTC said...

I never said I read it!
But I am starting now

Anonymous said...

"There are currently too many people viewing this document" D:

I definitely need to read at some point.

Dat fucking Writefag said...

Holy hell,
I just finished it.
I...I cried tears

THANK YOU SO MUCH PEN STROKE

ToonNinja said...

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Sethisto said...

Good! Cause I rolled the dice with this one too.

Poor pre-readers needed a break!

Big Mac said...

Gah! Too many people reading this at once! Oh well. It looks good.

Anonymous said...

There are currently too many people viewing this document. Please try again later.
Damn,I desperately want to read this...
Oh well,I'll try again later.
I love you author,I've been hoping for A pony/portal 2 crossover fic since before it came out.

Pen_Stroke said...

@Sethisto

Well, its a good thing I was working with Batty Gloom then.

He and I are writing buddies from another website that happened to run into each other here on Equestria Daily. A kind of Sonic Rainboom moment.

Batty Gloom is an amazing grammar editor, and I do my best to repay his efforts by offering content editing for his stories. Together, we've made a solid dynamic duo for the past few years. (On stories that I won't mention here on Equestria Daily)

Still, I'm glad to see people are enjoying the story.

Anonymous said...

So is it unofficial Portal 2 Day here at Equestria Daily?

:D

Thomas said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Batty Gloom said...

Batty Gloom here and I just wanted to say that it was great to help out my good friend Pen Stroke. I may be a good grammar editor (though I do make a mistake here and there, of course) but Pen Stroke is an amazing writer and I hope you appreciate his first fan fic on Equestria Daily. If you simply *liked* my own work, you'll *love* Pen Stroke, because between the two of us, he's definitely the stronger writer.

Anonymous said...

That....was...BEAUTIFUL!

Anonymous said...

Portal comic, Portal parody video, Portal fanfic.... truly this is the work of Trollestia...

Anonymous said...

Inb4 someone draws P-body and Atlas as ponies...

nukeiffum said...

DIS STORY.
You guys are really talented to be able to properly replicate what makes Portal what it is... without the puzzles. Considering that the puzzles makes up 80 percent of what Portal is, that's a pretty large accomplishment.

Everypony and robot was kept in character, and GLaDOS's psychological torture was both unnerving and hilarious at the same time. It was a brilliant story, and it was totally worth the time it took to read it. Props to you for pulling off such a great story.

Now I have some science to do. No, really, I have a chemistry exam to prepare for. >__>

ToonNinja said...

Wait a minute, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! GLaDOS got her hands on Fluttershy! SHE MUST PAY!

Anonymous said...

Somepony needs to draw Atlas* and P-pony. NOW!

*I got nothing

McGack said...

Oh man I love this, it feels like im playing portal again, releasing the neurotoxin just to see what dies is such a GlaDOS thing to do.
Its incredible how you tailored GlaDOS' comments for each pony too I dunno what you type =/

Anonymous said...

Yay! I'm glad you didn't kill off GLaDOS. :)
Great Story.

Darkfarr said...

As much as I'm loving this story, the Portal fanboy in me is hating the fact that Chell is completely mute. D:

According to developers she only chose not to speak so that she didn't give GLaDOS the satisfaction of a response.

Of course, I've only finished the first section, so I could be completely wrong about the story. >.>

Anonymous said...

I loved Portal 2 and I know I am going to enjoy this... If I could read it that is!

The anticipation is killing me, and so is google docs.

williamcll said...

chapter 5 - cupcakes reference

Batty Gloom said...

@williamcll

Good eye, mate. We were hoping for someone to notice that. There's also a "Hell Hath No Fury" reference too.

Anonymous said...

I highly enjoyed this story, even though I prefer a different characterization of GLaDOS.

Anonymous said...

BRAVO BRAVO excellent read. Do you plan on a sequel? I thoroughly enjoyed this. Characterizations of the character s were excellent I loved how you tied in the mane 6's character flaws. But once again bravo bravo.

Flamester said...

So, awesome.
Can't wait for a sequel.

Anonymous said...

Requesting Ponytized GLaDOS from this story I wonder what's gonna happen next...

McGack said...

dunno what to type* I fail at English

JeanSplice said...

UUURGNAUT WREX! Clifhangers -_-

that was wonderful, GLaDOS' character seems accurate, and i suddenly realize how horrible she is when the person she's insulting isn't mute.

Sparkler said...

Ok. That was wonderful!

Anonymous said...

This is really good. you monster.

Anonymous said...

I nominate this for best crossover ever award.

siraj said...

Referencing the slow clap processor was priceless!

I only spotted a few typos in the whole thing, but beyond that, it was amazing!

... Sequel?

Fire Brony said...

This makes me hate GLaDOS even more, which is good.

Also, how DARE GLaDOS lay her grubby, metallic claws on my Luna! Time to get my revenge playing through the Portal series again!

chinlamp said...

Just got through part 5, cupcakes references, slow clap processor, Pinkie Pie breaking physics again, amazing. I'm finishing this in one go.

Anonymous said...

Oh... there had BETTER be a sequel to this!

Thattagen said...

I actually DID have something important to do today! CONFOUND THESE PONIES!!!

PenguinPlayer said...

I have only read the first chapter so far, so forgive me if it's justified later in the story, but...

Chell isn't mute.

Source: http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/109845-Valve-Portals-Chell-is-Silent-Because-Its-Funnier

Quoting directly from the source:
"Wolpaw admits that Chell can definitely talk, but added: "She just chooses not to, what with the robots all being dicks. Why give them the satisfaction?""

So yeah, she's not mute. But other than that, great story, definitely my favorite crossover fanfic.

PenguinPlayer said...

@Darkfarr

Oh, somepony said it first.

I still brought the source though.

Dat fucking Writefag said...

Is somepony here a girl?

You definetely try the Glad0fied MLP theme. Here's how:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1oQn66gvwKA

Anonymous said...

You sir deserve the internet. My two favorite things on this planet in one perfectly made story, Portal / Portal 2, and MLP.


Ya know what...
You don't deserve the internet.

YOU deserve to be God for lets say... to be fair to God... forever!

Anonymous said...

This is a triumph.

MidwestBrony said...

Just finished this story, the first long fic I've finished, and this is so great. Very good, despite some writing errors, that ending is interesting too.

Pseudo Faux said...

@Anonymous

I'm making a note here, HUGE success.

Anonymous said...

I would have to agree. The crossover category has been rather disappointing compared to the other categories. But this. . .


This was just fucking awesome.

Filiecs said...

This needs to be a game, or a movie. NOW!

You are a genius at writing. You fit every character perfectly and the GLaDOS torture extracted laughs, shock, and rage. Bringing out emotion like a story should.

Thundergod said...

Thundergod here, reviewer for the FiMFiction DailyForum. I want to say that before this, The fic Timelords and Terror was my favorite. THIS. OUSTED. IT. The characters were just like from the show/game, GLaDOS' black humor was as good as the stuff in Portal, and the climax was, again, something I'd expect from Valve. Normally, I rate based on a 10-bite scale, but this? This deserves more. 18 bites out of 10, because test chambers. If this game went out now for $3000, I would whore myself out to get the money, because this would be EPIC,

P.S. Once the cutie mark bit was mentioned, I knew what was coming.

Pseudo Faux said...

@Anonymous I'm making a note here, HUGE success.

I'm going a bit biased here, after seeing all the crossover fanart I was expecting this to happen at some point, but this has honestly been one of the best fics I've read. Shame P-body and Atlas went the way they did at the end. Though there's always next time.

Batty Gloom said...

@Pseudo Faux

Don't worry, they're still alive....just a bit more...digital right now.

Anonymous said...

If this was made into a game or modded I would gladly cash out on a brand spanking new computer just to play this mod and then hand the rest of my money out to whoever made it.

Kujiiro said...

Right now I'm on chapter 4, and this story is freaking fantastic! This deserves 10/5 stars! A typo here and there still bugs me, but nothing too annoying yet.

And a big thanks to the artist of that picture! Extremely helpful visual reference for Chell!

Anonymous said...

Cell is a mute because she doesn't want to give glados the satisfaction. She can talk VALVe has said.

Anonymous said...

STORY SO GOOD!!!

Joe England said...

Man! I'd say that's definitely the definitive My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic/Portal crossover story. And it is just bizarre that there's competition for that. At any rate, great characterization. I'm a little sorry that... spoilers... GLaDOS survives. But I know how hard it is to keep a good villain down. I'm more sorry that the thousands of (presumably ponified) test subjects in the Vaults apparently died off camera! Or were they exempt from the dimensional rip? I'd assume so, because otherwise she wouldn't have needed to abduct the "native" ponies.

Anonymous said...

That was amazing and I really want a sequel right NOW!!!!

Pen Stroke Pony said...

@Joe England

Due to the fact I purchased the PS3 version of Portal 2, I haven't been able to play through the cooperative camping. I was already almost done when I did nose around and discover the additional plot the co-op bits offered.

So, yes, we're just going to assume all the cryogenic frozen test subjects were left back on earth.

Oh, and to those who are just a little miffed about the mute thing. I only really played the game, didn't really research whether or not Valve intended Chell to be really mute or just a strong silent type.

So, basically... I'm calling it creative license.

Batty Gloom said...

@Joe England

Maybe it wasn't clear enough but they actually got everypony out.

Anonymous said...

@Batty Gloom

I think he was referring to the test subjects found at the end of the Portal 2 co-op, although it would appear that in the story GLaDOS had just started testing for the bots.

Joe England said...

@Batty Gloom
I dunno... I'm talking about all the people who were in suspended animation, as revealed in Portal 2's co-op mode's ending. That's thousands of prisoners who'd need to be out of the facility. Were they all liberated?

BagOfChips said...

Other than the fact that Chell chooses to not talk to GLaDOS and is not actually mute (confirmed by VALVe), that was pretty entertaining.

Seemed pretty true to their characters, except I think your GLaDOS was a bit too wordy.

Skyclimber said...

Dang that's brilliant! Almost perfect characterization of *everyone*, fully realized locations and utilization of source details, and additions that fit perfectly with both storylines in accordance with the mash. Thank you for writing this!

Also, I think that this should be quite doable as a Portal 2 mod, interaction with other characters and everything. Assuming the player is interacting with everything from a Chell standpoint, we'll miss some of GLaDOS/Pony interactions... Unless we're able to see them from a security monitor between challenges? There's the multiple portal guns to consider, and only one mouse... Keep only one targeting reticule, but add on extra buttons, either with a four button mouse or a keyboard/mouse combo? Then there's the countless new models we'd need to make... If I actually owned a copy of Portal 2 right now instead of just 1, I'd be on this challenge like a parasprite on, well, everything! Unfortunately, I'm being patient and waiting for the Christmas sales... but this is really tempting my patience. If someone starts this mod up, I want in, even if it's only for the general design and resource creation processes.

Anonymous said...

I'm not even joking right now. I mean, I turned off my sarcasm AND humor data so this is all VERY serious. Well, that last joke was made AS I turned the data off so it will be excluded from my previous statement.

That being said, this must be made into a mod or a whole game by itself and spread to the masses. Imagine all the science that would be done by the players. The sheer amount of praise this story has gotten has been recorded and put into data which was then placed into a graph. I am looking at this graph now and I am actually quite surprised at the output which the graph represented.

"This story has successfully made Portal 20% cooler." Really. That is what the data said. We weren't even testing for the variable "Coolness" yet. That test was to come later.

Look at me still talking when there's science to do. And when I say Science, I mean testing how long I would be able to hold my breath while I wait for this to be released. Because when Equestria Daily gives you ponies, take those ponies back. And give them portals, and guns. This has been a pre-recorded message.

Pen Stroke Pony said...

Wow... I'm overwhelmed with the response here. I'm glad to see you are all enjoying the story.

In regard to some comments, I offer these explanations.



=============
Why is Chell Mute?
=============

Chell is mute because at the end of the game GLaDOS makes the comment "dangerous, mute, lunatic" I took this as a clue that Chell was meant to be honestly mute. It did not cross my mind to go poking around the internet to see what Valve was thinking. I took what I was presented in game.



===========
What happened to the other test subjects?
===========

I have the PS3 version of the game, and because of the PSN outage I've been unable to play the co-op campaign. The people I would play it with want to play over the network so their steam accounts get the same achievements .

So, I was unaware of what was at the ending of the co-op storyline. Now that I do know, thanks to you readers, I've slipped a little addition into the first chapter.

The basic explanation I'm going to go with is that the cryo frozen test subjects did not get pulled through portal and into Equestria. What happened to them in the human world, I'll leave that up to speculation. I'll just say that they didn't go through the massive portal at the beginning.

Руслан said...

Simply awesome. Thought I like 'good' and 'slowly turned good' GLaDOS, yours made me kinda sad. But there was Caroline and I at least was glad (GLaD) to see her.

Skyclimber said...

Portal 2 Mod plan:
1) Start forming a team
2) Get someone to look at the (extremely) brand new Portal 2 Authoring Tools (literally just released today) and see what all is available this time around for modding and reusability
3) Assuming team is mostly formed at this point: start brainstorming the logistics behind the mod.
4a) Get cracking on the hundreds of new models, armatures, skins, etc.
4b) Simultaneously have people working on transforming the story into gameplay scenarios, turning the gaps in our knowledge of Chell's perspective into puzzles, and somehow integrating the scenes with other ponies and GLaDOS that Chell can't see into the gameplay
5) Keep working on it. A lot.
6) Once we reach 80% of game completion and we're sure it will be completed, find voice actors, either characters sound-alikes or the original people if we can swing it.
7) Beta test and bug fix. A lot.
8) Release.
9) Hope that neither Hasbro nor Valve takes umbrage at our creation.

BagOfChips said...

@Pen Stroke Pony

Yeah, I can't knock you too much for that. For the longest time I just assumed she forgot how to use her vocal cords or something because she had been asleep for so long. I think it was Chet who said that she's silent simply because it's funnier that she's silent. In a world gone made she's the one source of sanity.

But yeah, if she's not mute that changes a lot and ruins the end so it's no big deal.

Pen Stroke Pony said...

@Skyclimber

If this starts to gather steam you can count on me to help refactor the story into playable levels. After all, I know certain parts of the story don't really fit as playable levels... but they could be made to.

Skyclimber said...

@Pen Stroke Pony
Huzzah! We've got ourselves *the* writer! Now to snag at least half a dozen artists, about three to five people with Source/Hammer experience and a copy of Portal 2, and we'll be good to go!

Andrew said...

THIS WAS SO EPIC I ENJOYED IT SO MUCH OH MY GOSH YOU DON'T EVEN.

Here's hoping for a sequel. A happy one.

Andrew said...

It's not every day you read a fanfiction that's just dripping and radiating with awesomeness like this one is.

Anonymous said...

Nice, everyone from both of the series were perfectly in character.

Mexibrony said...

Just finished reading your story and I must say I love it. Everyone stayed so perfectly in character and you depicted GLaDOS perfectly. Heck you made me hate her even more. How dare she abuse ponies physically and physiologically!

Fact Sphere said...

Fact: This crossover was amazing
Fact: I would help out on the team if i knew how to mod
Subfact: Or had computing power to do so
Fact: Characterization was amazing.
Fact: Crimes against my dear Bright Eyes, and her muffin shall be punished
Fact: 98% of what other posters say is lies
Fact: Sethisto shall never meet the Great and Powerful Trixie

Fierce said...

@Skyclimber

Artist? nah
Source and Hammer knowledge? yes


Where do I sign up?

Anonymous said...

I smell sequel hook.

Putuk said...

'OHH! I’m going to need streamers.'

The first thing I thought when I saw GLaDOS giving Chell a 'party' in Portal 2 was the following:
"GLaDOS, you could learn alot from Pinkie Pie...".

LOL! :D

FrostV952 said...

Did he just call Caroline "Caroline McLain"...
Oh Yeah, he did, and i like it! "Caroline Johnson" would've been cool too, anyway

Tosxychor said...

I'm making a note here: Huge Success.
Truly wonderful work, and brilliant dialogs/characterization! Thanks -so much- for sharing! ^^

Anonymous said...

Somebrony needs to make this into a comic book, or something like that! :D

Putuk said...

Ok, done reading it.

So much SCIENCE!

drkHD said...

I have to say, despite being a good read, the Portal characters seemed a bit out of character to me. I can't fault you too much for Chell's muteness (you already described what you did there), and I enjoyed GLaDOS's humor, but she wants her subjects to keep testing or die, not get stuck. Additionally, GLaDOS v1 is said to have been homicidal since she was activated, and Caroline was supposedly just a small part of what she was. The extra cores were added to v1 to make it so she wasn't trying to kill everyone within 1 picosecond. This comes from the Lab Rat comic.

Good writing, but I couldn't enjoy it as a heavy fan of the Portal story.

ZE Pony said...

Oh man, This fic is like. The awesome

Also I really really love how gladdos even distorted the theme song.

Still your a horrible person for making gladdos torture ponies. It says right so on your file, A horrible person. Very official. It also says your adopted so that is funny to

Dragoonofdeath said...

This was an amazing read. I second the motion to have this made as a webcomic. One of the best fics, and the best crossover fic i've read on here.

Anonymous said...

This was absurdly good, and I usually hate crossovers. Bravo!

Anonymous said...

Mother. Of God.

EPIC beyond words.

takeallmymoney.jgp

Yomandude said...

I liked Coltlus (how has nopony else thought of that name yet?) and P-Pony. Besides the grammar, this was an AMAZING story and I'll make out 25% of everything I own to you in my will.

Laurence Brown said...

(With apologies to Jonathan Coulton)

That was a lovely fic
I read in just one go
Didn't have Google docs
Try to make me wait
It made me laugh and cry
Not many stories do that
My final verdict is
It was shockingly great

In the end Chell was happy
Just what I was hoping for
Since I have finished reading
Now I only want some more

GLaDOS was very bad
(In an evil sense I mean)
I thought you got her malice down just right
All the ponies and Chell
Came across excellently
Once I started reading
I was doing that all night

You did the content justice
Just what I was hoping for
But with only nine chapters
I find that I want some more

So goodbye my Portal tale
Oh, did you think I meant this one?
No, I refer to the small
Little start on mine
That thing has been replaced
By a much better story
Yours was better anyway
So you won't hear me whine

You left some loose ends hanging
That's what I'm hoping for
To reach out and grab you
To get you two to write some more
Please tell me you'll write some more
All I want is to read more.

Batty Gloom said...

@Yomandude

Everyone keeps saying there are some grammar mistakes; if you're reading this, would you or someone else mind telling me what they were?

I'm not angry, I'm just concerned because it was my job to catch those mistakes and I'll appreciate knowing what I did wrong so I can help both myself and Pen Stroke to be better writers; after all, we do want to write more stories.

Anonymous said...

A few grammar issues. But other than that, FANTASTIC STORY!

It kept me at the edge of my seat the whole way through (and I read it all in one sitting). This is probably the only fanfic that I have actually enjoyed. The writing portrayed a perfect middle-ground between the writing of Portal and the writing of MLP. And as much as I don't like fanfiction, I now have the sudden urge to write one of these crossovers.

Thank you for a lovely read!

Anonymous said...

I liked it. I can accept Chell being mute because it was interesting, even though I prefer for the actual game canon that Chell just doesn't want to give her enviroment the satisfaction of a response.

Still, it would have been interesting to see this story with a talking Chell.

Anonymous said...

That was fan-fucking-tastic! Oh man it was just so well done I still can't get over it. I don't think valve could have written a better crossover.

Super Kudos to you, I look forward to see what Glados gets up to now that the enrichment center is gone.

CogWeaver said...

The one thing that I absolutely love the most (and am kinda freaked out by...) in this story is how GLaDOS's "celebration" song goes along with the MLP theme song.
Someone *must* put that song to the tune of the theme song in GLaDOS's voice.

NOW.

Anonymous said...

Already working on an animated version of this. #1 i require voice actors seeing as my brony side is kept hidden from my friends plus we're english so you'd have off sounding ponies.
#2 i require artists to draw the ponies seeing as I don't have the patience to draw out 11 fully animatable ponies not to mention a ton of scenery.
I'll handle the animation itself and compile it all together. Sound good to anyone? :P Gmail me at stevie.stevo7@gmail.com. Fan made episodes... wouldn't that be nice during our pony drought?

Anonymous said...

>complete
:(

CogWeaver said...

@Anonymous

Sounds awesome, however I can see issues that might arise with voicing the main six.
Otherwise, if you're really serious about doing something like this, you might wanna shoot a message over to Sethisto. Maybe he can make a small post over it to draw more attention.
Anyways, I'm in favor of something like this.

Joe England said...

I'm glad the "extra test subjects" plothole was addressed. Like I said, this really is a great story. There's very little that needs improvement (for the record, I kind of like Chell as a mute).
If I were to change anything else, I suppose I may as well mention that I would have had Celestia engage GLaDOS on a much more cerebral level. I was a little disappointed to see her reduced to a mere prisoner with simple threats and word games. To me, there was an opportunity missed for a verbal duel between two highly intelligent and manipulative beings. My impression of Celestia's personality is of a supremely competent, analytical mind, a politician and parent figure with the wisdom of centuries, and a worthy foil for GLaDOS.
Chell's method of dealing with GLaDOS was basically to ignore her. But what if Celestia engaged GLaDOS as an equal? In fact, how much would it infuriate GLaDOS to be spoken down to? She clearly has emotional buttons just begging to be pushed. After all, for all her raw intelligence she has the relative maturity of a spoiled child. And I think Celestia would treat her as such. An air of condescension would rankle GLaDOS like an intolerable itch, as she grows desperate to assert her psychological dominance. The fact that her prisoner is at least as calculating as she is would provide a unique obstacle.
Of course, this is more a matter of personal interpretation than anything else. Hey, maybe I'll write a side story or something. But then, I'm not sure that wouldn't be improper fan fiction etiquette.

Dat Fucking Writefag said...

@Joe England

You know, it can work as sidestory quite well.

Kujiiro said...

@Anonymous

OH MY GOD YEEEESSSSSS!!!!!
I've gotta help with this :D

Joe England said...

In fact, I've already written out a script for a dialog between Celestia and GLaDOS. Anyone want to see it?

Batty Gloom said...

@Joe England

Batty Gloom here. While I can't promise anything, I would like to see it and talk it over with Pen Stroke sometime next week after I've finished moving (yeah, no Equestria Daily for awhile). If he likes it, we'll consider changing the story to match your analysis.

Keep in mind, I can't promise anything...

Fierce said...

@Skyclimber

Saw your reply in email but cant find it on here, google spam filter?

anyway, listed my email and Steam profile on my blogger profile

DooDawDay said...

I try to point out my favorite part of a story when I finish it. I can't. there are simply far too many favorite parts.

Don_ko said...

Great story and Brilliant crossover! Gonna make an illustration +_+

Pen Stroke Pony said...

@Don_ko

Wow... illustrations! I'm flattered that you would want to do something like that.

Can't wait to see them. May even slip them into the google docs so that its not just a fan-fiction... its an illustrated fan-fiction.

20% Cooler, easily.

ActionScripter9109 said...

@Skyclimber

I have some professional experience as a texture artist, modeler, and coder for 3D games. I've never done a Source mod, but I have the SDK and I'm willing to try. Where do I sign up?

ActionScripter9109 said...

This story was epic. As a huge Half-Life universe fan and a brony, I congratulate you guys on a job well done!

Anonymous said...

Best crossover EVER!

Skyclimber said...

@ActionScripter9109
Test, test? Here's to hoping Blogger won't eat my posts like it's done the past few days...

Action, send me an email (address is in my profile) containing your google wave name so I can add you to the wave. If you don't have a wave account yet, just sign into wave.google.com with your google account and you'll get it immediately. Welcome aboard!

By the way, if anyone else wants to help make the Portal Pony mod out of this story, and has modeling, texturing, and/or Source/Hammer experience, the above instructions can apply to you as well. Hope to see you soon!

ZuTheSkunk said...

First I'll start from pointing two major things that I don't like.

* Ponies, and generally all creatures from the pony universe, just can't be built like we do: from bones, flesh, blood etc. It's just not right. They should be built from magic, and generally act differently when injured. In a more tamed way (see example in Feeling Pinkie Keen, where Twilight quickly recovers from being directly hit even with a PIANO). Because it's a fairytale world. Existence of bones, flesh etc. allows for making stories like Cupcakes theoretically possible. And that's definitely NOT right.

* Celestia, Luna and Twilight are the most powerful magicians in the world. The first two are the goddesses/creators of the world! And the latter was capable of keeping Ursa Minor and whatever-that-thing-with-milk-was-called in the air, both at once; not counting what happened just before she earned her cutie mark. And all what GLaDOS had was human machinery. Machinery from a world where magic doesn't even exist. It just can't be powerful enough to block the magic of a _GOD_ (Celestia/Luna) or sometimes overpowered magician (Twilight). It's logically impossible.

As for other things, it was already pointed about Chell not being a mute, but since she appears to be completely mute in the game and there are at least a few occasions when she SHOULD say anything, her muteness is a more probable version than just being silent through a personal decision. Plus, being a mute makes Chell a more unique character.

As for the rest, I can't say anything that wouldn't repeat the previous opinions: great story (even with these two major things that are serious errors in my understanding) and a great crossover, with perfectly recreated personalities of all characters as well as general feeling of both the game and the show. I read it all in one run, which means that I really enjoyed it.

Though unlike a few people here, I must say that I'm not very happy knowing that GLaDOS survived. Because seriously now... how many times she can do it until someone finally destroys whatever keeps her alive? After reading the story, I just can't help but hate her. What once again proves your outstanding work in recreating her personality.

Leinad said...

i don't normally read fanfiction, but when i do, i read this one.

tired jokes aside, THIS WAS AMAZING! i wanted to punch GLadOS soo bad during the fluttershy scenes, and i really like how you handled Chell's muteness. Valve be dammed, there's no way she stayed quiet through all of Portal 2 because she wanted to.
Everypony was in character through the whole thing, and the final battle with glados's pony form had me on pins and needles.

Bravo to you good sir or madam. Bra-FREAKING-vo!

balloonpup said...

Wow. Words fail me. This was truly amazing.

Joe England said...

@Batty Gloom I'm sorry, comments were wiped... did you say you'd be interested in me e-mailing something to you?

Kitsune.Tales said...

This story... is absolutely amazing. The characters are true to themselves, GLaDOS, as always, is faultless in her humor, and the plot kept me riveted and invested in the safety of the ponies since chapter 1!

I must admit though, it's a great angle to see the events unfold from Chell's perspective. In the games we never get to see her inner monologue, but you, good sir/madame, have done a superb job giving her a suiting personality.

The ending left me feeling warm and fuzzy. After all the trials and tribulations, the result was well worth it for Chell and the others. This was just the pick-me-up I needed before heading into more exams for school!

Kudos to you! If your planning another story, I look forward to reading it!

Pen Stroke Pony said...

@Joe England

Yes, Batty Gloom and I are always interested in reading things made in response to our work.

My-email is at the bottom of each chapter of the story and can also be found by checking out my blogger profile.

Skyclimber said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
bubsAKAvermin said...

>Actual portals for a cutie mark
Woah what?
>Four portal guns
The hell are you going to do with four portal guns?
>GLaDOS calls Pinkie Pie "special"
DOHOHOHOHOHOHOH
>GLaDOS convincing Pinkie that nobody likes her parties and references Cupcakes
OH DEAR GAWD
>GLaDOS implying that Ditzy is a retard
ALL OF MY RAGE
>GLaDOS sings MLP theme
trollfaceGLaDOS.jpeg
>Chell talking
ALL OF MY MONEY

Skyclimber said...

We're still looking for modelers and Source/Hammer bronies who are interested in helping turn this into a Portal 2 mod. Just send me an email if this piques your interest and you'd like to find out more.

~Jack said...

This is undoubtedly one of if not the best crossover/fanfiction I have ever read. You illustrated all of the characters personalities extremely well (not that I know much about portal) and I could certainly see all those events happening. Also a very original idea for a crossover.

P.S.
"Whether she knew it or not, that computer had just crossed a line."

Hells yes!

Anonymous said...

LOVED IT. I love any story on this site where everyone is IN CHARACHTER(both portal and MLP charachters) and no shipping, and this fits it so well for both the MLP and portal sides of the story. One of the best ones I've read here. WIN WIN WIN.

Somebody has to do a fanart of Alicorn robot GLaDOS.

Anonymous said...

SO AWESOME!

I wish that we actually got to see test chambers designed specifically for unicorns and pegasi though. Those would have been pretty cool.

ThisHomeBoy24 said...

There is no words that can describe how amazing this story is. I started reading the first part but couldn't stop until I finished the whole story. I really hope to see more.

Anonymous said...

6 Stars!?!

IMPOSSIBRU

Anonymous said...

This is probably the best thing that has ever come from the internet.

Period.

Azarokkusu said...

I like the "cupcakes" reference in part 5. So fitting for GLaDOS.

Sethisto said...

Woah, this made it on popular posts. I have never seen a fanfiction do that.

Darth Equus said...

Bravo. Bravo. *THIS* is the way fanfiction should be written.

BRAVO.

Anonymous said...

Glados worked superbly with the main characters to establish nice depth, interplay and believability. Good work. Did enjoy.

Anonymous said...

Loved everything about this.

...Even the little mind-f at the end.

Anonymous said...

side story was pretty awesome, too.

trollestia > GlaDOS

Dat fucking Writefag said...

Hey, what happened to the guy who wanted to do a dialogue between Celestia and Glad0S?

Pen Stroke Pony said...

@Dat fucking Writefag

He wrote the extra chapter, and its now posted up with the story as a side story.

Anonymous said...

@Anonymous

Not even GlaDOS can survive the trolling Trollestia.
Now I feel bad for her...

ActionScripter9109 said...

I just read the side story. Trollestia ftw! :D

Also, we're still looking for more bronies with modeling/Source modding experience to help with the Portal 2 mod based on this story. If you're interested, tell me, Skyclimber, or Pen Stroke.

madmax said...

AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!

SImple said...

This was some amazing writing. I'm amazed! I really liked this a lot.

Pen Stroke Pony said...

Wow, praise from the famous madmax! Now its offical, I am BLOWN AWAY by the response to this story.

Unfortunately, that also means I've set a very high bar of standard for myself. I wonder if there are any other kinds of stories people would be really interested in reading?

Anonymous said...

If I could level some commentary: GLaDOS is way, way, WAY too evil.

I know, right? But you've written her as cartoonishly evil and antagonistic, rather than "just" psychotically devoted to the task of testing and taking Chell's murder of her very personally.

Every other character's spot-on (or, in characterless Chell's case, a good interpretation), but GLaDOS veers into designated villain territory when she's really a much more complex and interesting character than that.

Anonymous said...

...yeah, I can't get any further. Sorry, but your GLaDOS is just awful.

IMHO and all that, but she's just NOT the GLaDOS from the games. She's a shallow supervillain caricature, and despite the rest of the fanfic being good, that critical misstep is ruining it for me.

Batty Gloom said...

@Anonymous

While I was not the main writer for this project (I merely supplied opinions and ideas) I do feel like this part is my fault. Because my computer is a piece of crap that can't even play the original Half-Life...and I lack the funds to upgrade/replace my computer...I have yet to play Portal and Portal 2. I tried to fix this by listening to the all of the ripped GLaDOS audio from both games and what did stick out to me the most was, in fact, what, as I interpreted, an almost psychotic desire to kill humans (why else would a computer flood an entire building in neurotoxin?) and her biting sarcasm.

But I'm a big enough person to admit when mistakes were done.

Tell you what; we've actually redesigned the story to better fit in with the side story, which we've have actually declared canon to the rest of the fic. What, *specifically* do you think was out of character with GLaDOS that we can fix? Would you mind reading the side story and tell me if that's more in character? Because I think Pen Stroke and I wouldn't mind having Joe England lend us his help if he doesn't mind since we've both agreed that he seems to understand GLaDOS just a tad better than us.

I will say for the record that the fic does say that half the tests were psychological (breaking down the mane six to see how they perform under stress) and after being killed by Chell twice, I think even GLaDOS would want to remove the threat that Chell has become to her.

that_guy said...

BEST.......CROSSOVER.............EVER!!

floatzel_eevee said...

I loved it,I read it all in one sitting,i give it 5 stars and can not wait till the sequel of this story if there is one.

Anonymous said...

What's wrong with GLaDOS here? Basically? GLaDOS doesn't want to kill for the sake of killing. She sees death as a necessary risk for SCIENCE! She's insane, but not murderously so. Her opinion of death isn't "It's good" or "It's bad," it's "Death is a tool." A very useful tool, mind you. But still no more important then a hammer. Or a thermal discouragment beam.

What really gets to her is when people break the rules.

But hey, I loved the fic!

Anonymous said...

So you said that you have not played portal 2? that might be part of the problem. One of the things that game reveals is that (SPOILER) towards the end, Glados is partially the way she is due to the fact that ever since she was activated she has never had a moment without hearing the voices of the other personality cores among other things. She was basically influenced towards testing because the body she is in wills it on whatever AI inhabits the frame. among other things she also discovers for herself that one of the reasons she tried to avoid killing Chell was that out of her entire life Chell was the closest thing she had to a friend who understood her. So yes, the Test/murder happy incarnation you have in your story is close to the actual Glados, but only superficially. Glados's actual hidden personality is a lot different. Maybe if you can't play the games you could locate Let's Play on youtube? Because experiencing the story fleshes both Glados's and Chell's personalities and histories out a massive amount.

Anonymous said...

Another thing I was thinking about was the mind reading bit. I never recall anything about that from the games, and it seemed a bit odd because realistically having such a thing would allow her to predict everything the ponies do. Instead, maybe have her fall back to conventional Q&A with mindgames in between? That seems a lot more like Glados to me.

SG46 said...

AGH! I can't handle this much epicness!!!

Anonymous said...

That side story needs an Advice Celestia:

CAPTURED BY HOMICIDAL AI?

SHOW HER WHO'S THE REAL TROLL ROUND HERE

Anonymous said...

Oh my...
That was amazing! It was so brilliantly written, I could not stop reading it! It really does deserve so many 5-stars.
I selfishly hope that cliffhanger goes somewhere, I would dearly love to continue reading this fic!

Dionysus said...

Normally I don't like crossovers THAT much, but in this case it's a really awesome piece of fanfiction ! (Portal 2 + MLP:FIM is a killer-combination on it's own as we bronys know) (spaaaaceee)

I really liked the "first half", it was interesting to see how everypony was reacting to being tested by GlaDOS. I wished there was a bit more of that, but then again I guess everything that could be said, was said.
The "second half" that focus on Chells Plan and Battle with GlaDOS was really good too, but I enjoyed the first half a bit more.

The "extra chapter" with Celestia and GlaDOS was amazing, I really laughed at some of Celestia lines. It's exactly how I would imagine Trollestia in a Situation like that.

And a Happy Open End ... well for what more could you possibly ask ?
Maybe I would have prefered to have GlaDOS dead, but ... she's GlaDOS after all.

Joe England said...

Woah, I just revisited this and found out you'd incorporated my writing! Hey, that's great. I had no idea until now. I'm flattered!
I confess I was a little surprised at how extensively it was rewritten. I'll admit there were changes that you (the original authors) made that I'd rather you hadn't, but there are also changes you made which I really liked. So I won't complain. It's your fan fiction at this point, I just contributed. But at any rate, it's really nice to have contributed to something fun and engaging.
So, hey, thanks! And thanks, everyone who liked my little side story. I'm chuffed!

Anonymous said...

So, I guess I'm a bit like to this Portal/Pony lovefest, but I really got a kick out of this fic as well.

But how scary was the ending? Did anybody else feel a tingle run down their spine?

Anonymous said...

I just read the whole thing. This is probably my new favorite (MLP) fanfic of all time. Definitely worthy of its six-star rating.
Also, not even GLaDOS can withstand the full might of Trollestia.

Anonymous said...

This fic... Is brilliant. You managed to channel the Portal feel brilliantly, and the way you combined it with pony goodness was even more so.
You, sir, are awesome. =D

~The Jack

madison said...

I think I just read a Cupcakes fanfic reference in part 5! XD

madison said...

I just now finished it. Will there be more or a squeal? It was so awesome and amazing that it deserves one!

Parallel Logic said...

I liked the working portals across her flanks, a rather random, yet funny, concept to employ.

I've read a little over half way through the work and I can't help feeling the narrative teeters out somewhat after the first few chapters. For example, GLaDOS's dialog seems to be very tit-for-tat when she's captured the main cast. In the game she had a subtle malicious undertone, but she didn't outright declare she was a murderous AI, in fact most of the first Portal game is devoted to the player being unaware of how malicious the AI really is.

The initial discovery scene seems rather awkward to me in that Fluttershy witnesses a mountain fall from the sky, investigates, and then is content in her findings to meander over to Sugarcube Corner. I feel there is a lack of curiosity on Fluttershy's part to explain the phenomena, and a lack of interest to continue searching the mountain to find out more about it after discovering a lone survivor.

ToonNinja said...

Just read the bonus story with Celestia and GlaDOS. Dear Lord, she truly is the only and only Princess Trollestia

Anonymous said...

@Anonymous
The ending gave me an idea for a sort of revised version of the song "Want You Gone" that would fit well with this fic. I think I'll go type it up now...

ActionScripter9109 said...

@Anonymous

Care to share it when you're done? If it's really cool we might be interested in using it for the Portal 2 pony mod that goes with this story.

SebastianW said...

I just started reading the first chapter, and already I am getting tired of every second paragraph containing [i]yet another[/i] reference to Chell being mute. While it's not established one way or another whether she [i]can't[/i] speak or somply chooses not to, we [i]do[/i] know that there's nothing physically wrong with her larynx because she definitely can make noises, such as grunts of effort or pained exclamations.

It's fine to proceed from the assumption that she can't speak in your fanfic, but there's no need to bring it up every other sentence, and keep in mind that it's not the same thing as being unable to produce any sound at all.

BlackWidower said...

It seems some aspects of geekdom are universal. I assume there's going to be a part 10 at some point...

Also, how would a portal on a curved surface work? Unless the other portal is also on an oppositely curved surface.

Finally, did anypony keep their portal gun and/or long-fall boot? I know I would!

Kaijinzero said...

just finished the trollestria attack on GLaDOS. i am not disappoint.

and guys stressing over OOC problems, its a FAN fiction, meaning the FAN writes for the character, and can pretty much choose what they say. if you dont like how theyre written, write your own version of this. ill bet youll change your tune real quick.

Anonymous said...

You probably should mention that this contains major spoilers for the ending of Portal 2.

Anonymous said...

Someone caused the Celestia vs. GlaDOS chapter to get yoinked!

Pen Stroke Pony said...

@Anonymous

Check the DeviantART Link. All chapters, including the GLaDOS vs Celestia chapter, are posted there as backups.

Anonymous said...

My money. TAKE IT ALL.

Anonymous said...

Somebody PLEASE get Hasbro & Valve to work together, so they can make this awesomeness!

TheShagged said...

Pretty sweet. I enjoyed this, good job. You get all the props. ALL OF THEM.

Twilight Sparkle said...

I just read that side story.In GLaDOS' voice.
Celestia can be such a right royal bitch.
Ohh.I loved it,the entire thing.
I can't wait for the inevitable sequel.

Steel said...

great story, rather enjoyed it but I really REALLY liked the side story. Glados verbally OWNED by Celestia is a rare and wonderful treat. Heh she can Dish it out but can't take it.

ALXXMaXX said...

@drkHD

They never said that it was version 1 in Lab Rat. Anyway, if it was, that copy of Caroline used to make GLaDOS v1 could have become corrupted somewhere along the way before being put into the GLaDOS body, and the backup Caroline just might not have known what had happened, and chalked it up to the scientists with their talk about "personality cores" that she had heard about during her lifetime.

VFX Kid said...

You know, I had this whole essay on how this story is awesome, but I think this will suffice:

WIN.

There. One simple word. "WIN." I think it summarizes my feelings quite well, actually. I just wish I was as great a writer as you.

VFX Kid said...

@Skyclimber
You have no idea how much I wish I could help with the mod. It would thrill me so much to be part of it. Unfortunately, I have minimal experience with game modding, especially Source modding, so I would more than likely just be a burden. I may try practicing, though, so if there's time for me to join, then I could. Again, though, for the moment, I can't. Sorry.

Kujiiro said...

I'm sorry, but the Celestia vs. GLaDOS side story doesn't work. There are numerous spelling and grammar errors, and GLaDOS is portrayed as an emotionally distraught adolescent. Celestia's attitude was... somewhat decently accurate, I suppose.

I'm trying to find something good out of this. It wasn't all that bad, just... not good. Forgive me if I come off as rude. I see in the comments some others like it, so there is the possibility it was just unappealing to me.

ActionScripter9109 said...

@VFX Kid

If you have some modeling or coding skills and you're willing to take a shot at it, I think we'd be glad to have you on the team. The more the merrier, especially with all the original objects and locations we're going to need. It's not as if we're holding out for some kind of professional help. :P

VFX Kid said...

@ActionScripter9109
Well, I DO have some modeling experience... I'm just not sure if there's any particular methods or programs needed to make Source models.

ActionScripter9109 said...

@VFX Kid

If you have Blender, that will work nicely. The rest of us are using it currently. If you don't have it, it's a free download, and it's not much different from any other modeling software.

If you feel up to the task, by all means join the team! The rest of us are learning things as well.

VFX Kid said...

@ActionScripter9109

It just so happens that Blender is the program I have the most experience with! How might I go about officially signing up for the team, communicating with all of you, etc.?

Anonymous said...

this fanfic is awesome! nice work, but after read the comments, a lot of people complain about GLaDOS being more insane that in the game, i am the only one that remember the “OhohoHOhoH... my hard drives. I think I slipped a hard drive.” and after that she said how she would punish Weatley in a more insane way? i assume that the whole "dimension travel" thing corruted GLaDOS mind even more (c'mon, sound logic!) and about the "Chell wasn't mute!" well, you also could said that the "dimension travel" destroyed her vocal cords, yeah sound wierd but ironic, all the time she reamined silent and now she is mute for real, but that's just my idea...

ActionScripter9109 said...

@VFX Kid

I can't see an email address on your Blogger profile, so here's mine. josh.busuito@gmail.com

Shoot me a message and we'll take it from there.

bubsAKAvermin said...

>reader's cut
EPIC TROLLESTIA IS EPIC

Anonymous said...

i must ask, but will there actually be a sequel?
i am not demanding one, just asking... will there be?

Timber said...

I heard about this story on Bronyville's podcast. I am SO glad I was able to read it!

Pen Stroke said...

@Timber

Which episode was it? I'd like to listen to it and hear what they had to say.

Anonymous said...

SSSPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCEEEE!!!

Anonymous said...

Ch. 1: nearly DIED laughing! (in good way)

Anonymous said...

derpy vs GLaDOS: lost all humor. not funny anymore. actually quite upset about it. in a bad way... >: |

Anonymous said...

Holy crap, have I not commented on how much I LOVED this fic to death? It is literally the only reason I have begun to read fan fiction; because it taught me that fanfic can do what is too epic and too awesome to be canon due to legal reasons.

Can we introduce a 7-Star rating, just for this fic?

Anonymous said...

Y'know, Since Valve has quite a bit of bronies in it, I wouldnt be surprised if this or something similar is the plot of portal 3. oh, sorry, by that I meant, I WANT THIS TO BE THE PLOT OF PORTAL 3

bronyguy said...

Hell. Yes. There's the GLaDOS I know and love, tormenting everypony. The bonus chapter between her and Celestia was absolutely BRILLIANT!

Anonymous said...

Stopped reading at "duck tape."

Andrew said...

Oh man, that side story was made up of epic and win. So much of it.

Anonymous said...

If I could I would convince Valve and Hasbro to work together to make a movie out of this. Even to get someone to make a comic out of this. I need visuals to accompany the awesomeness that is this fanfic.

ActionScripter9109 said...

@Anonymous

There's an actual Portal 2 mod on the way for this story. Stay tuned!

VFX Kid said...

@ActionScripter9109

I didn't think we were supposed to talk about it yet except to recruit...

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