Description: At the Grand Galloping Gala, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie start making their own fun ..
Wait why is rainbow dash like that in the first place?
Are there any stories other than Pinkie Pie / Rainbow Dash in this fandom? No, seriously.
@AnonymousHey now, Dash is shippable with anyone, as has been proven again and again and again.
@AnonymousHey, look down. Don't be a stupid.
that picture makes me worried, so much gloss! but the story's great, here's to hoping you write more of it!
@AnonymousPinkieDash is just the best ship
I... I think I might be reading this at the same time the author is writing it. I thought I was going crazy, but it seems people can view and edit Google docs at the same time. Good stuff so far!
@AnonymousAnd by the way, it was VERY brave of the author to move through the finishing and editing processes with so many eyes watching instead of, say, copying the whole thing over to a private document to keep the work hidden. It must have been a nerve wracking experience to know the whole thing went public before it was ready to. But because of the way you did it, anypony who stopped to watch learned a lot about the way a story really takes form - the way general ideas are lined out and slowly built up through additional imagery. A sentence here and a paragraph there get snipped or added, and out of that dance something greater than the some of the thousand tiny parts emerges. It's a heck of a thing to be an unwitting teacher, so thank you! This absolutely made my day.
Oh my goodness.There was a lot of passion in that.My heart needs to slow down.
Why Dash you look... different today. O_o
Now I want to feel like strawberries...
It didn't feel like I was reading a story about Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash at all. Dash was so creepy here all I could do was feel sorry for Pinkie through most of it. I don't mean to say I think it was poorly written, per say, but for those characters it clashed too hard for me.
@AnonymousWhile I really enjoyed the story and intended to post something along the lines of: "best pick-up line ever", you're comment made me think of "Rainbow Dash: Date rape edition".
Great story! Pinkie loving Sarsparilla? Awesome!
@AnonymousI do agree neither of them were really in-character in this story. It was an enjoyable read, but personally they didn't feel quite like Pinkie and Dash. Pinkie is far too serious; a boring gala shouldn't be enough to *completely* take the random out of here. And I don't really see Rainbow acting the way she did her, pressing alcohol on her friend and eventually having a drunk makeout session in the middle of the gala... and then presumably flying somewhere while intoxicated hoping to take advantage of drunk Pinkie some more, lol.
I just so happened to be drinking strawberry wine while reading this. I loved it. The story, that is... I guess I loved the wine too. Thank's for taking the time to write this! <3
I agree with previous comments.Personally, I loved the story and had a sudden massive urge to have wine and berries, which I satiated earlier today with a bottle of White Zinfandel, and some raspberries... but they don't really feel like the characters they're meant to represent. And I admit, I too was thinking about how it felt like Rainbow Dash was taking advantage of Pinkie Pie in the end there, after pushing alcohol on her. Something feels wrong about the characters here, but the writing is great, and the story is fantastic, so it was still perfectly enjoyable to read.
@AnonymousI'm glad you and others have liked it despite significant characterization flaws.I first attempted to go back and fix characterization, then realized I should just stop. The whole text became a rat's nest of additions and corrections, when at first It had been a fun romp at a crossroads in a possibly-drunk-Dash and tipsy Pinkie's world. It's at least partially based on three-going-on-four years of fraternity life and some personal anecdotes.If the characters are wrong, really they are. As to how serious that last line was, or Dash's intentions, I've said some things I regretted, or didn't, after a bottle of red wine ...
I now need to go delete that picture
@AnonymousYes please. I've always found that picture of Dash so creepy.She cute as just plain old Dash. Made-up Dash in that pic is just terrible.
I actually like the pic, although there's something kinda creepy about it...
Oh hey, some good shipping. I was starting to lose faith. Thanks Chistery! You better finish it though.
@AnonymousAgreed. It was well written, but it didn't really feel like my little pony. Or maybe, if the Pony license had been bought out by MTV... It seems to me that this story would actually have worked better as its own thing with original characters.
That picture just creeps me out every time I see it. Interesting ship fic, though.
Love the fic, can't say it doesn't bring back memories of my first semester of college, but oh well. Despite initial characterization flaws, I think you worked out Dash's character by chapter two, although Pinkie Pie seems like she isn't random enough, although that could be because its mostly focused on Dash.On a less intelligible note: Omigoshchaptertwoissosad!
The second chapter... my heart... my body wasn't ready.
This is a very sweet little tale and moreover, a very well written one. 5 stars.
Dammit, need part 3 now!!I laughed my ass off to the point of spitting coffee at "Eyeballs shouldn't taste". Brilliant!!
Awww! The breakfast was hilarious, with a dash of vicarious embarrassment, so I was left open for the serious turn later on. This definitely needs a conclusion!
Hear that sound? That's my heart ripping in half out of empathy. Seriously, this is really well written.
Dang, this is a really well written story, and the characterization was way better in part 2. I think it might have even made PinkiexDash my favorite pairing over AJxDash >_>
LOVE IT.Y U NO PART 3?
@AnonymousPraise the lawd he has seen the light!
Awww, I feel so bad for Pinkie and Dash. :( But on the other hand, Applejack was just so funny at breakfast. XDI hope part three lives up to the first two.
chistery, good job!!!!! i was not dissapointed :D
I can't believe it. This may be my new favorite shipping fic. This is BEAUTIFULLY written, your Equestria is sorta gritty and i love the feel of it, everypony is definitely in character despite the slight shift in tone from the canon, and just ohmygoditsawesome. Please tell me you're halfway through chapter 3, because I need moar!
Part one made me feel exactly what it was like to like someone a lot and it captured that exact moment when flirting turns successful.Part two... Well the afterglow felt nice.But then it made me feel EXACTLY what it was like when someone you love (and even loved physically) doesn't love you back. Ouch.
@PacceYeah, I know that feel bro. Loving someone who doesn't love you back is the most crushing feeling.But this was a really well-written story and has great character interaction. 5 stars.
This story feel nice.By that I mean that the story is good and going on nicely, but also that it's the kind of story one could read at any time and still get a good feeling from it. :)
Brilliant and kind of heart breaking too....NEEDS MOAR CHAPTER
I LOVED the breakfast scene in part 2. I can't get enough of your style of writing. Part 3 please!
Great story! Brings back plenty of memories for me, as well. The build up, the after thoughts. Even the breakfast scene (Though it was probably a bit more awkward, since it was her family, haha. XD)Definitely a shift in characterization and mood from the usual, but definitely not a bad one, considering the subject matter. I wouldn't want all Pony fiction to be approached this way, but it's definitely a nice approach that mixes things up.
Whyboner.jpg: The Fanfiction
Me GustaAs long as you keep characterization consistent, I think this story should do fine. I think "the talk" needs to happen next chapter because, after only seeing things from RD's perspective, it would be nice to get Pinkie's thoughts on the matter
AUTHOR PLEASE FINISH THIS FANFIC I BET YOU!!! please? *fluttershy voice*
*reads latest chapter*P...Pinkie...*bawls*
Ok, the end of chp. 3 I was starting to tear up, Pinkie... oh you poor.../cry;_;
I'm not sure I understand Pinkie's point of view. What was it that gave her the idea that Dash wasn't interested in anything long-term? Simply that Dash flinched from Rarity's comment about being in love?
I have never before wanted more to be able to hug a little pink pony until she stopped being sad.What the fuck has this fandom done to me.I haven't cried yet, but I think I'm going to before this is over. Well done.
i have a feeling this story is going to end up totally breaking my heart
Ah the tender hooks of young love where a single misstep is to painful to contemplate, so they plow down the the most agonizing path.And thank you for the Breakfast.
This is before reading the rest of it, but I'm surprised no-one else has mentioned the wing boner Dash gets in part 1.For some reason I find it cool to see little references like that which, while not something everyone will get, is still nice to see.
Very tasty, I shed a single tear of Pure Daaaawww! while reading it, so a Job Well Done. The story itself is, well, to be frank quite a cliche - Meeting, having fun-fun-fun (because its Friday, Friday!), and than both are so uncertain what to do, both are fearful to make the first step, that BOTH belive they are overlooked. Simple, yet the fanfic works well, because it present a great deal of awesome penmanship, constant, unshifting and well created personalities, quite realistic insight into a "Party Hard" ponies life.So, all in all, CAN'T wait for next part, I want to know what would Rarity do with her new Knowledge and how happy Pinkie/Dash will be, when they realise, that they both want to be with each other.So far: Five Cupcakes!
After reading the rest of this, I can't wait for more. Good work author, you have me interested.
YEAAAAAAA new part ty
@Anonymousyes, but they suck
The only thing stopping me from crying is the hope that there will be a happy ending, there will be a happy ending.... Right?
@AmazighThey both seem to want the same thing; they just think the other isn`t interested. I see it being resolved happily, in this case.
@AnonymousI going to like totally cry now =C just promise us mr/mrs author person that you will finish this story? alot of pony fic writers stop mid story with a depressing end...AND also i love your fanfic!sincerely,Obsessive pony fan
OH GOD, PLEASE WRITE MMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
Oh God, I can really sympathise with both Dash and Pinkie :/ Reading this physically hurt... You're an amazing writer!<3 Coffeebean.
The first bit didn't quite sit well with me, but the story's been winning me over gradually.
5 Star tag plz.
@MidnightFINISH YOUR FREAKING FANFIC ALREADY!!!
Lol sorry ment to say @ author
Dear Celestia please finish this soon...
Oh my God. This is fantastic. Entirely fantastic. This author is... absolutely brilliant. I mean, their grasp of language, their deft word-play... it's astounding. I must now go and read every other fanfic they have written, as I impatiently wait for a continuation in this series.
gosh darn you Christery. I've never cried to fanfiction. But after reading chapter 3 I really broke down. I love the series. Please finish it.
Please for the love of Celestia finish this fic! I must know what happens!
You've made this brony sad. And happy."At least for a little while, I was special."
As of the season finale, this story is officially canon.
Oh please oh please oh please finish! I must know!
Make do moar chapter. NAO
Ohmygod I need to know the ending before I go insane...PLEEEEEEAAAAAASE?!?!
Do want more!!!
ending needed please, I can't wait any longer
AAAAARRRRRRGGG!!!! SHE DOES THINK OF YOU AS SPECIAL PINKIE!!!!! MUST! HAVE! ENDING! NOW!!!!
It started out happy, then got weird, and now I has a sad.
Patience young ones, art is a form that should not be rushed, let it come at it's time, panic if more than a month has passed, before it's wasting your worries. It has only been 11 days, I assure you that chistery has a tendency of making sure the work is the best possible unless fans attempt to rushed it, so waiting is better, the end result will be to die for. So wait, the faithful shall be repaid.
For Luna's sake, FINISH!!!
When RD said, "You want to 'feel' like strawberries?" i thought "hawt dayum!!!".Just sayin'…
you realy need to finish this story I beggith it of you also your amazing this is the first time a story has made me feel any emotion
amazing story, best ever xD but need moarrrrrrrrr D:
This story is officially discontinued.Pack it in, people.
But...why? =( I loved this story. I read part 4 on your DA account and was looking forward to part 5.
wha...? Nooooo! This was fantastic!
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh no D; -cries-see what you did! you just made a girl cry be ashamed :3
WHY IS THIS INCOMPLETEDEAR CELESTIA WHY DONT YOU FINISH IT
D'Awww...Let the unofficial endings abound! D:
@ChisteryLike hell its discontinued! you are grounded until you give a proper ending! ...please? If thats ok? I really, really want to see this come to fruition. your writing is just so stylized and really, really enjoyable to read and all around great! plus the crying Dash and the Rarity thing left a cliff hanger! A HUGE one! it can't be over!
Awesome. Very cute, more please!
Why exactly would rarity bring up the topic of tribadism?
Damn it, this has been a good story, it is a right pain in the arse that its been discontinued. Espcially on a sort of cliffhanger like that.I am saddened.