Author: Dat Fucking Writefag
Description: Twilight Sparkle found something in her studies and makes the discovery of a century.Pony Symphony
Pony Symphony Part 2
Pony Symphony Part 3
Pony Symphony Part 4
Pony Symphony Part 5
Pony Symphony Part 6
Pony Symphony Part 7
Pony Symphony Part 8
Pony Symphony Part 9 (New!)
32 comments:
Remember reading this in /co/, looks interesting
...interesting...
confusing grammar and word choice, like you said, but still an interesting and plausible storyline. The writter here does seem to overdo AJ's accent though, which tends to make it a bit difficult.
Overall, I'm pleased.
I shall edit!
Hey, I am the author of this fic.
First of all, I thank kari for editing it. It's really hard to get beta-reader these days.
MasterMask, I was aware that I overdid it, but I don't know how redneck lingo works, so I just looked over the other fics to see how they handled it.
Grammar and word choice are indeed a problem, so I hope I can overcome that problem soon. Maybe I should read more classic English works, I dunno.
Heh heh, Pony Symphony. I finally get it.
Okay... I have no idea with what this Crossover is supposed to be with. Cowboy Bebop?
@RommyWolf
Yup.
Maybe it should be additionally labeled here to avoid further confusion.
I'm starting to wonder who's in the tube, Spike Speagle, Jet Black, Faye Valentine, or Radical Edward.
I noticed that it isn't on the front page?
how about an update sometime this friggin year!
Gosh, I wonder why more people haven't read this! As far as crossovers go, it's pretty well written.
fav'd
can't wait for the next chapter
Hmmm...the ponies swearing really breaks the immersion a bit.
Really good storyline though, looking forward to ch 8.
@Anonymous
But without little swearing it wouldn't be a CB crossover now, would it?
@Anonymous
if he ever makes a fucking chapter 8!
@Anonymous
Hey dude, chill, I got a fuckin' life to handle. I will be finished soon, so hold yer horses.
Chapter 8 was awesome, well written and I approve. Please write moar! :D
Excellent crossfic, You really pull off spike(beta) well. It seems like chapter 8's the ending... but I'd most definitely read more if more were to be read. Keep up the good writing.
@Anonymous
Oh, it is the end. Of this session.
The real fun starts with the next one.
@dat fucking writefag
If this were ponychan I would post a picture of a very happy pony and say MFW.
But it isn't. So I won't.
@Anonymous
Heh, what would happen if there was a thread on Ponychan?
http://www.ponychan.net/chan/fic/res/6595.html#6595
Heh, what would happen if there was an update?
I would read it with great enjoyment ^^
Need more :3
Wtb chapter 9
waiting patiently for author to deliver
If we're in the cowboy bebop universe with each individual star being surrounded by it's own unique, hospitible planets which orbit around them, then how does Celestia raise the sun?
The link to part 9 just links back to this page.
this ... wow, needs work. tense confusion, word confusion, spelling errors. the characterization seemed, eh, ok. not entirely sure i agree with the mad-cap 'pure zany' Pinkie Pie but this may have been started earlier in Season 1 and for that, it's ok. my god, though, that language use.
it's been a long time since i watched Cowboy Bebop and my sister was always more interested in it than i ever was, but Spike seems rather out of character. i've always thought of him as more calm, even in extremely odd situations, only really being ... expressive when he's annoyed. i may be wrong, as i said it's been a long time since last i watched any episodes. so if so, please forgive.
overall, interesting (if somewhat hard to reconcile) premise but you really desperately need an editor. like, majorly. i don't know if i can finish this, i'm on chapter 5 and it's becoming increasingly difficult for me to ignore the ... grammar and usage problems. sorry ... i hate pointing things like that out, it makes me feel like a jerk. sorry.
@Minalkra
>tense confusion, word confusion, spelling errors.
-Huh ? Really ? I never had any problem reading the 8 previous parts, so far ?
Note the errors you saw, then post them. 'That' should be helful.
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And now... Wow ? I remember that story... It has been a while.
New part should be good.
Alright....
Chapter 1:
"Spike hold his right arm behind is back and looked down shamefully" hold should be held
"All the curtains are closed" are should be were
"All were anticipated." Not really tense here, just ... what? This implies someone was anticipating them which, while it is ... true, it's not something that really needed to be said. Perhaps you meant they were filled with anticipation?
"It was when Twilight Sparkle showed up again, this time less vivid than AJ seen her." had seen her
"and she smelled like as if she didn't take a shower for days." hadn't taken a shower
"Twilight encountered, her excitement overtaking her again" encountered is used wrong, should be countered.
This is all within the first chapter, a chapter that will be the introduction of the reader to both your writing style and mechanical aptitude. And these aren't all of the problems, just the tense issues and a few of the more ... eclectic word choices. There are also a few instances of two speaking characters sharing the same paragraph (generally frowned on) as well as just ... strange choices for both verb-noun placement and a bit of a dry 'and then so-and-so walked and sat.' It's accurate, just a bit plain. Admittedly, the few things I've written were called dry or, what was that word ... stale? Anyway, an editor would help tons getting some of these things fixed. I'll let the author decide what to do with the information I've given.
Also, congratulations, I dropped my un-capitalized style for this post and only realized it in editing. Far too late to go back to fix it. I hate that.
Ch9 :
>But mah sis here might get up before yer done, and Nightmare Moon is on the loose 'gain..."
-Are you compairing AJ with Nightmare Moon, or are you really saying that Nightmare Moon is back(which wouldn't quite make sense) ?
This sentence isn't quite clearly formulated.
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Well, even though it has been a while since last update, and that the new chapters are a bit on the short-side...
Story is still quite interesting I must say, and with ''The Store'' now open, well... I wonder what will happen next. :)
What sort of odd jobs and mysterious contracts await the hero ? One day, we will find out.
Hey there. Chapter 11 should be up soon.
1st, thanks Minalkra for his critics. I will make sure to learn from this.
Yes, my grammar and my use of tenses suck, but I am planning a big rewrite once I am done with at least 2 sessions. Hopefully during Xmas, because I have lots of stuff to do IRL.
I have 2 new prereaders, so I hope I will get some support on that matter. Human beings should always be able to learn new things :3.
Yes, Spike is OOC in the beginning, but I did this on purpose for the later story line. But I won't tell anything more.
@Nova25, yes, I was compairing AJ with Nightmare Moon.
Ultimately, yes, it really needs some really really great editing.
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