Description: Twilight was just about to study the flowers she gathered but she is interrupted by a sudden discovery. (mild shipping)
Well, Fluttershy sure jumped the gun on that one, lol.
@Anonymous Well she isn't that far of the truth. Rainbow Dash has heavily implied that she seen Twilight as a lover. But I agree that Fluttershy acted far too brashly for her own good.
Yeah, Rainbow did make her feelings pretty obvious, but Twilight never gave any indication whether she felt the same way or not. Fluttershy probably at least should've waited to find that out before she packed up and just left.
I'm going to guess that English isn't your first language and I know it can be damn hard to express oneself in their own language, let alone someone else's.But beyond that, I'd say it's a good effort. Keep writing.
The description up above for this fic indicates as much; English isn't the author's first language.
Really cute I hope that we get to see a second part
Really cute story, but the end made me sad.The only problem I found was that it's really fast.Don't get me wrong, I like short stories, but you tried to do a lot in a really short period of time.
It really does need a second chapter. Twilight's emotional state is pretty up in the air, even ignoring the fact she's being an ingrate the entire time.
I'm really hoping this one isn't a one-shot, because it really leaves off at a cliffhanger and would be kind of choppy, especially Fluttershy's reaction to the situation. This story really could use a second chapter to help it out.
Good job, why make a difficult choice if you can just take a third option? No, seriously, the conclusion to the whole thing was just as surprising as it was pleasant to read. Nice work.
I was not expecting the chapter to end like that. I think Twilight learned an important lesson, though: you never really appreciate the things you have until you lose them.
Twilight had the right idea, besides there's still Pinkie and Applejack... no wait they just hooked up looks like your stuck with the unloved rarity of the group. (Not that the word rarity is not capitilized for a reason)
Or there's always Derpy or Zecora or Big Mac or Carrot or OPPP...
what a TWEEST!
Rainbow Dash: I got my heart broken by Twilight Sparkle.Fluttershy: I also got my heart broken by Twilight Sparkle.Rainbow Dash: Wanna make out?Fluttershy: Hell yes!Twilight Sparkle: Why is it all the girls that fall for me eventually turn into lesbians? ...oh waitTWILIGHT SPARKLE, BRINGING PONIES TOGETHER!
Is this a new meme? Cause I can get behind a 'Screw Twilight' reoccurring thematic.I remember another story where Twilight went out on a limb and also ended watching people she might have been falling for making out in the distance. It's not like the series doesn't already go out of it's way to hurt her, no reason the fanbase shouldn't also.
@A.n.B.Tear streaming Twilight Sparkle is the one true Twilight Sparkle. Accept no imitations.
I don't normally comment on grammar and stuff, but this was pretty hard to ignore. The story was there, the characters are there and as far as I can tell, this is gonna end pretty well. So, I will assume that English is a second language for the author and read on! ON TO CHAPTER TWO!
Grammar needs help get a god editor that will help ALOT I'm sure you could find one here or on ponychan. More importantly this was a DAMN good story, don't hesitate to write more.
That was good, my one problem was that RBD didn't want to find Fluttershy at first. Rainbow IS the element of LOYALTY. Other than that, good job.